..I really need to clean a few mugs around here.
But you are coming back with high heels”. Her mom sent me a text asking me what I said that made my wife throw her phone in to her lap and groan aloud. Mission accomplished haha
To hide in strawberry patches.
What, don't get it? Come on, have YOU ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch?
Then I guess those slippers are doing a pretty good job, huh?
I thought to myself "I really should buy her a fry pan "
If she doesn't like the slippers, she can go fuck herself.
Me: No, it must've slipped away
To cover his bear feet
...but the investors got cold feet
He would say "Don't come running to me if you get your legs cut off!".
"Yep, sure is son."
"Oops I dropped it. Too slippery."
He's two and already a dad. I'm so proud.
"Well that's nice they give you both of them."
He asked if he could get them and said "I've always wanted bear feet." "Fine," I said, "take off you shoes." He did, smiling. Next, I told him "take off your socks." He excitedly eyed the slippers as he pulled off his socks. When he finished, I said "there, now you have bare feet." My wife just sighed and shook her head.
"I'm fairly sure I'm slipperier than you."
I really need to clean some mugs
I really need to wash out the mugs...