Floss Puns

And that's the tooth of the matter.

It truly was a breath of fresh air.

Daughter buys some fairy floss
Dad: "You know, spiders make cobwebs for free."

Like bro you were there!

I said yes, you do it twice a year.

Thank you I’ll see myself out

But then it grew on me

I told her I normally throw my hip out whenever I floss

They most certainly have floss.

A floss-o-raptor

Bob Floss.

We all have our floss.

She accepted me with all my floss.

He said "oh, I didn't know you were a Flossipher!"

No strings attached.

"Its because it taught kids how to floss"

She was showing her patient how to floss.

"You need to exercise more. Have you tried dancing? Maybe you should join a club", the doctor says.

The man, unsure if more movement would really solve the problem, replies: "I don't know Doc, I think I want a second opinion on that."

"In that case, I'd suggest you to see a dentist", comes the answer.

"But Doc, why would I go to the dentist with my hip problem?"

To this, the doctor says: "It hurts because you don't floss."

Because not all who plunder have flossed.

He then proceeds to take out his dentures, brushes them and whistles.

Floss Vegas.

He recommends I floss every day.

I want to start a page to post my embroidery projects in. Give me some puns about needles/floss/hoops and any other sewing and embroidery ideas.

Thanks!

Link to some of my work: https://imgur.com/gallery/DDBmG

He always asks his patients what they are going to be for Halloween. If it’s anything related to Star Wars, he asks...

“What would Obi-Wan Kenobi say if he were a dentist? May the floss be with you!”

Smh

Dispatcher: Sure. Go ahead.

Me: Flossing prevents tooth decay.

Me: sometime I get sad and I don't know why

I saw my new dentist for the first time this morning, and the hygienist was going over my insurance with me. We were talking about full mouth x-rays - I wasn't sure when my last one was and she wasn't sure if it was covered.

Hygienist: "The doctor recommends doing it anyway, and if your insurance doesn't cover it, he'll eat the cost."

Me: "I just hope he remembers to floss afterward."

...so as to avoid floss-contamination.

Our boys got bags with new toothbrushes and stuff from their dentist visit. Out oldest looked inside and said "hey, it cane with floss!"

Without looking up from the TV, I blurted out "that's floss-some".

So my mom had jsut gone to the store to get extra fine filter floss for the aquarium I am setting up for her. The conversation went like this:

Mom: "I saw this and thought it is what you meant. It's super-fine floss. Will this work?"

Me: "Yeah, that's fine" (mom rolls eyes)

Dad: "Well that's what she said zwhenry, it's fine. Will it work though?"

My mom left the room without another word while my dad and I were trying to contain our laughter.

Floss Vegas