Toothpaste Puns

I was Crest-fallen.

Sadly, there was no plaque on it.

A toiletry

Because you’ll destroy your stomach cavity!

So if you have a dental implant, and brush with blue toothpaste, what do you call it?

A Bluetooth device.

Courtesy of my seven-year-old son, who is getting the hang of this pun thing.

Don't worry, they're all in mint condition.

I'm crestfallen.

It was a nice change of paste

I'm still an asshole

I was crest fallen

Fluoride-a.

So my dad was going through his normal morning ritual, when he screamed "GODDAMMIT" from the bathroom. He walked out a few minutes later, looking sad.

Me: "What was the yelling about?"

Dad: "I dropped my toothpaste."

Me: "That made you upset?"

Dad: "No, ZTheJerk. Upset doesn't cover it. I'm absolutely crestfallen."

I called it Nonsenseodyne.

Next time, I’ll ask for teethpaste.

The flavor is "mint to be".

Now all I need is a toothbrush.

Coalgate.

What did the toothpaste wear to the club? --A tube top!

So I tried it but it didn't mend my car at all.

It isnt mint to be swallowed.

Crest-ianity.

...so as to avoid floss-contamination.

Apparently some toothpaste companies are on Santa's naughty list. Many are calling it the Coalgate Scandal.

I told her, "Ya win some, ya lose gums!".

He's really crestfallen about it.

...she felt "crestfallen."

Because it was in mint condition.

Me: "Oh yeah, I need to put toothpaste on the grocery list."

Dad: "Don't do that! It'll be all messy!"

Technically, he did. FFS Dad

I was crestfallen.

I'm crestfallen.

He said crestfallen.