best place to find puns
πŸ‘οΈŽ 25
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/nouganouga
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 07 2019
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How do you find Will Smith in a snow storm?

You look for fresh prints

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheHibernian
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 26 2021
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Chinese take out: 8 dollars. Tip: 2 dollars. Getting home to find out they forgot part of your order...

Riceless

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Degtyrev
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 15 2020
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You are lost in winter but find a cabin. You find it has a fireplace, a kerosene lamp and a stove, but you only have one match. What item in the cabin do you light first?

The match.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 34
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/leetrd
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 24 2021
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My boss said, β€œI find it highly suspicious that you are only sick on weekdays.”

I said, β€œIt must be my weekend immune system.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 28 2020
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Though I did find the color palate of this particular film rather surprising
πŸ‘οΈŽ 37
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/alphanumericusername
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 19 2020
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To the person who stole my spectacles. I will find you.

I have contacts.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/OliPark
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 17 2020
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A waiter asks the "How did you find your steak, Sir?"

Me: I just looked next to the mash potatoes and there it was!

Source: tedthestoner2.0.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jabhiram
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 25 2021
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Mate was feeling down so I told him there's a positive and negative to everything, you just gotta find it...

Poor fella can't even put batteries in right....

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BaccyBuegs
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 26 2021
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I come up with a really lame two word gay joke the other day that i was afraid my gay mate might find offensive

Butt willy?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/josuhataylor
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 11 2021
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I can't find my 'Gone In 60 seconds' DVD.

It was here a minute ago.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 461
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 23 2020
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When people find out I’m not a very good electrician

They are shocked

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/crazyfortaco
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 23 2021
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How do you find a blind man at a nude beach?

It’s not hard.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/LordCinko
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 16 2021
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I just bought a dictionary today and bought it home to find out that all the pages were blank.

I have no words to describe how angry I am.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 43
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 10 2020
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So you find the perfect Asian gal, you get up the courage to speak to her, you walk over and start small talk, you ask her name, and you find out...

Shi Tou Yong

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/skycooper11
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 12 2021
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When I was a teenager, I tried really hard to find the hypotenuse of a circle

That's when I realized it is pointless.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rpdaca
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 22 2021
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A woman walks into a music shop and finds an album for 95 cents and pays for it with a dollar

she got a nickleback

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sarcastic_kittie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 26 2021
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Why can you never find a hippo hiding in a tree?

Because they are so good at it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 38
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SumOfMostFears
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 07 2020
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Where do you find a turtle with no legs?

Right where you left it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/squarish_woodworking
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 18 2021
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I used to be a flat earther. I even set out to sail across the ocean to find the big ice wall.

But eventually I came around.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jradio610
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 15 2021
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There was a joke I wanted to share with my family but I can’t find it on here..

I literally just reddit.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 30
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/iTzbr00tal
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 08 2021
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Why couldn’t the priest find his rosary?

Because it was Lent.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/alatteprincess
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 24 2021
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Where should you go to find a date after you leave your ex?

The Y!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HappyRamenMan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 19 2021
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Ngl I find it pretty funny
πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/rinkemax
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 30 2020
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I can't find my scrubber in the shower

It's aloof-ah

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/abeen30
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 02 2021
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When I was digging through the wardrobe on the weekend, I managed to find a present for the kids that I wrapped in a box last year and forgot to give them. Bargain

Can't wait to see their faces when they realize they have a puppy.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/runew0lf
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 24 2020
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I was up all of last night, trying to find my keys

Then it dawned on me

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Folically-endowed
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 24 2020
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police find two teenagers eating and drinking fireworks and battery acid

one was let off and the other one was charged

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Nds_fan_using_emu
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 11 2021
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How does a giraffe find a job?

Through neckworking.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/khalizziebeth
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 03 2020
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When he found out I was sick, my friend messaged me, hoping that I will quickly find a deep hole in a ground full of water.

I'm happy he wished me to get well soon.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Sodrohu
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 04 2021
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A guy walks into a bar to find pieces of meat hanging above him…

He asks the barman about it and the barman explains, β€œIf you can jump up and hit one, you’ll get a free drink, but if you miss, you have to buy everyone a round!”

The guy looks up and ponders for a minute then replies, β€œNah, the steaks are too high.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/snrckrd
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 22 2020
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I heard they want to find a new actor to play Iron Man

Guess they'll need to cast someone.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/abhishekms89
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 30 2020
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Sometimes, when you find yourself walking through a shallow pool for no reason...

...you have to stop and ask yourself what you’re wading for...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sully1227
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 09 2020
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Goldilocks, running from the 3 bears, finds herself in a dead end with nothing but a bag of ice. Papa bear is Drunk and scary. What happens next?

A Goldy-smack with a cold sack in a cul de sac, which is more than a bear with beer could bare.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ASimplyFantasticName
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 16 2020
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My girlfriend in college was obsessed with trying to find the largest known prime number.

I wonder what she’s up to now.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 31 2020
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I opened my radiator to find a lone insect, wearing sunglasses and a leather jecket. It said. "ayyyy!"

It was a cool ant.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 18 2020
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I find it really hard to say what my wife does for a living.

She sells seashells by the sea shore.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 23 2020
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As this year is coming to a close, I find myself thinking about all the things I would have done differently.

Seems like I got 20/20 hindsight.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MadSlingshoter
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 31 2020
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How am I supposed to find the Big Apple?

I don’t even know where the Minneapolis!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 84
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/lacazadora66
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 08 2020
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I can't find my limbo bar. Someone must have stolen it!

I mean, how low can you go?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 36
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jfshay
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 24 2020
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I don't think I'll ever find a stable job

To be honest I'm not too comfortable around horses.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/APunchToThePuss
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 17 2020
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What did the well driller sing to his customers when he couldn't find water for them.

Noel Noel Noel

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/timthedriller
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 25 2020
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To whoever stole my microsoft account, I will find you...

You have my word.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 25
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/_NotSlimShady
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 02 2020
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Boss: I find it highly suspicious that you are sick only on weekdays.

Me: It must be my weakened immune system.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 29
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 21 2021
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How did you find your steak, sir?

Right next to the potatoes.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/shazbeer
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 07 2021
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I just bought a Thesaurus at the store and bought it home to find all the pages were blank.

I have no words to describe how angry I am.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 196
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 16 2020
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How do you find Will Smith in a snowstorm?

Easy. Just look for fresh prints.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 75
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/EMOmosie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 26 2020
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How do you find Will Smith in snow?

You look for the fresh prints

πŸ‘οΈŽ 53
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PrinceGubbleBum
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 17 2020
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