Why do partcles get exited when we heat something up?
Because it's volume increases
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︎ Apr 04 2020
What did the exited gardener do when spring finally came...
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︎ Jun 27 2019
The King exited the toilet triumphantly...
...proclaiming he had a royal flush
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︎ Dec 17 2018
I exited the highway in search of some sausage.
Things took a turn for the wurst.
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︎ Jan 19 2017
My friend got mad at me yesterday and I don't know why. He had just picked up a sewing machine and was telling me how exited he was to start sewing, so naturally I asked:
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︎ Jun 12 2017
What is a beehive that doesn't have an exit?
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︎ Apr 11 2021
What is written by the exit to the sperm bank?
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︎ Apr 07 2021
Last night when exiting Disney, I asked my group if anyone remembered where we parked.
My son: βthe parking lotβ
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︎ Mar 10 2021
What do you call it when you accidentally miss the exit for your camp ground?
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︎ Jan 25 2021
There was a fire at the yodeling school. Everyone was asked to exit in an orderly orderly orderly manner
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︎ Dec 03 2020
Hey dad, can we stop at the casino at the next exit?
Dad: Sure, why?
Son: I need to go to the bathroom and the sign says they have the best craps in the state.
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︎ Dec 22 2020
I was exiting my vehicle and the dashboard told me βdoor ajarβ
Still have yet to successfully store my jam there
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︎ Sep 26 2020
Custom made Exit signs are all the rage nowadays in my town.
But I think they are on the way out.
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︎ Jul 13 2020
What does the sign say at the exit of the sperm bank?
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︎ Apr 07 2020
What's the safest room in the house during a zombie invasion?
After I dug into the details of a theoretical zombie crisis and the entrances and exits of our home, I settled on the master bedroom.
My son sighs and says, "the living room."
High five buddy, you got me.
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︎ Mar 14 2021
My girlfriend threatened to leave me if I didn't stop pointing out random exits and entrances.
I said: "There's the door."
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︎ Jan 04 2020
Aah the outdoors.
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︎ Apr 24 2020
My friend didn't want to exit the EU, so now he stays home making wigs for horses..
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︎ Apr 11 2020
What do you call a dramatic exit at a tea party?
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︎ Mar 07 2020
What do you call a beehive with no exit?
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︎ Jun 14 2019
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︎ Aug 16 2019
so youre american when you enter and exit a bathroom, so what are you while youre in the bathroom?
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︎ Oct 04 2019
If you're American when you enter the toilet, and American when you exit the toilet, what are you while you're inside the toilet?
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︎ May 27 2019
We were driving across state over the holidays and my 4 year old tells us she has to pee. We just happened to be almost to an exit with several gas stations to take her. I proudly proclaimed βUrine luck! There are plenty of places to go at this exit!β Sadly, I only got an eye roll from my wife.
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︎ Jan 02 2019
The store manager asked me if I could move the Kia that was blocking the exit.
I said that I could, but thatβs not my Forte.
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︎ Oct 21 2018
I was driving down the interstate when I came across a sign for the world's largest pickle...
I turned at the next exit and found that there was a whole town around it.
Shops, restaurants, even churches devoted to this pickle.
When I finally found the museum holding this legendary pickle, I discovered it was closed.
Dismayed, I went back to the interstate.
I just never saw what the big dill was.
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︎ Dec 12 2020
After one hour of searching I finally found an exit out of the room
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︎ Jun 14 2019
After giving birth, I quit my job. The exit questionnaire asked: βWhat else could the management provide β that might have prevented you from leaving?β
I wrote βBirth control.β
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︎ Oct 30 2018
There's a decline in exit sign use.
Experts are saying they are on the way out.
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︎ Feb 23 2019
This morning I climbed up to the beehive in my yard and used putty to block the exit.
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︎ May 24 2019
My workplace won an award for "Most Polite Exit Signs".
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︎ Jun 30 2018
All of the doors in a fire station are fire exits.
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︎ Apr 03 2018
I got scolded for exiting my house carrying a coffer with a ursine emblem on it
Apparently it's not OK to walk around in public with a bear chest...
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︎ Apr 15 2019
What do you call a group of fathers making a quick exit?
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︎ Apr 03 2018
My friends "Cactie"...
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︎ Jan 25 2019
If you make dad jokes, what language do you speak?
Pun-Jabi
proceeds to the nearest exit
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︎ Oct 28 2020
Have you ever heard of a reverse exorcism?
Itβs when the devil tells a priest to exit the childβs body.
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︎ Sep 18 2020
Pirates make me irate
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︎ Nov 29 2019
Upon exiting the elevator I noticed that I had just used Schindler's Lift
imgur.com/TpSKLN4
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︎ May 23 2014
What do horses in adjacent boxes call each other?
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︎ Apr 14 2020
What do you call a subreddit exclusively for the letter Q?
A Q-mmunity.
I see the exit door.
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︎ Aug 24 2020
What does it say on the exit door to the sperm bank?
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︎ Feb 05 2021
Novelty exit signs are quite a rage in my town these days.
But I think they are on the way out.
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︎ Jul 02 2020
My girlfriend threatened to leave me if I didn't stop pointing out random exits and entrances....
I said "There's the door"
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︎ Jan 04 2020
What do you call a beehive with no exit?
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︎ May 14 2019
Exit signs.
Theyβre on their way out.
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︎ Nov 06 2018
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