21 Hilarious Go Away Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

A family vacation is when you go away with people....

....you need to get away from.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD

📅︎ Feb 07 2021

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My day is full of conference calls, collaborations, and 1-on-1s. I wish they would all just go away...

...but then my life would be meetingless.

👍︎ 11

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👤︎ u/Ciden

📅︎ Jan 21 2021

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Why did the germaphobe go away to live by himself?

He wanted to be hermitically sealed.

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👤︎ u/TopGovtOfficial

📅︎ Sep 12 2020

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Man-go away.

👍︎ 1k

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👤︎ u/Minimine35

📅︎ May 16 2019

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I decided I could go outside as long as I stayed 6 feet away from everyone

So I went for a nice walk through the cemetery

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👤︎ u/HellsJuggernaut

📅︎ Apr 09 2020

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Where do ghosts go to scare away all of the insects?

Boo-da-pest.

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👤︎ u/timmyb55

📅︎ Oct 13 2019

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Sometimes it is better to just walk away from things and go back to them later when you’re in a better frame of mind.

While it's true, that's how I lost my job as a surgeon.

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👤︎ u/TommehBoi

📅︎ Nov 27 2018

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What do you call an ant that won't go away?

Permanant

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👤︎ u/Mbwanderski

📅︎ May 30 2018

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Every balloon store i go to tells me that my balloons are just going to fly away and i’m sick of it!

I just want a regular balloon, no strings attached!

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👤︎ u/Pocoparker

📅︎ May 24 2019

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The web designer presented us the options, but I knew right away which one we would go with.

I was love at first site.

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👤︎ u/lawpoop

📅︎ Apr 27 2019

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Where do birds go to drink their troubles away?

The crowbar.

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👤︎ u/Joesdad65

📅︎ Jan 29 2019

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When food based puns won't go away

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👤︎ u/RBC_SUCKS_BALLS

📅︎ Nov 19 2017

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Isn't a bit odd that you have to go completely off the grid to get away and recharge yourself?

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline

📅︎ Feb 08 2019

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“Hi, is this the rejection hotline?” “No! Go away!”

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👤︎ u/jc123ucme

📅︎ Dec 20 2018

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What do you tell annoying footwear so that it will go away?

You tell it to shoe.

👍︎ 11

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👤︎ u/xx_das_shame_xx

📅︎ Jan 23 2017

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I used to go over to my grandmother's house in the middle of the night and drink earl grey with her. It was our ritual. I called this evening out of habit, forgetting she had passed away, and her ghost answered.

I guess you could call it a boo-tea call.

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👤︎ u/NWmba

📅︎ Oct 31 2015

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I asked a contrarian yoga instructor to go away

He said "namaste"

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👤︎ u/Escaridole

📅︎ May 13 2017

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What weapon do British people use to make their enemies go away?

A sod off shotgun.

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👤︎ u/Not_Brandon

📅︎ Feb 01 2014

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My grandfather recently passed away. Here is his go-to joke.

Whenever we would all have an extended family dinner, he would always look up with a grin on his face and say "this is the best dinner I've had all day! Every. Time.

My grandfather was a man a few words. But dang it he was good at making the entire family groan.

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👤︎ u/airborneaaron

📅︎ Jun 01 2015

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Go away dad

Dad sits really close to son. Son: Go away. Dad: Towards you is a way, scoots even closer

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👤︎ u/Chrisfindlay

📅︎ Jul 31 2015

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What did the pessimist with the flu say when the doctor told him his congestion symptoms would go away within a week?

That'snot going to happen.

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👤︎ u/PoisedProgramar

📅︎ Mar 06 2016

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