My defecation is on a different elevation
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/flashmann95
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 29 2019
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My friend said he saw a nocturnal mammal defecate in a French River

I told him thats bat shit in Seine

πŸ‘οΈŽ 61
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Chilidog0572
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 01 2021
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Ah I love a good self-defecating joke

I shit myself every time I tell one!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ZackAshM
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 13 2021
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Two dogs were walking down an empty highway. One of them stopped and defecated in the middle of the road.

When he was finished, he looked at the other dog and said, β€œClean up that mess.”

The other dog sniffed the pile and said, β€œNope. That’s your asphalt!”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pippingigi
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 15 2020
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Did you know that Owls don’t defecate?

They have Owl movements.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CapnFancyPants
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 14 2019
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Did you know you have to urinate before you can defecate?

Because every poop starts with a P.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Umdron
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 26 2019
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It is said that male cows don't defecate

But as you See this is bullshit

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Jaku2201
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 09 2019
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I tried the world's most expensive coffee, Kopi Luwak, made with part-digested coffee cherries eaten and defecated by the Asian palm civet

Now every other type of coffee is un-civet-lysed

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Porkchops_on_My_Face
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 31 2018
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My best friend says she doesn't defecate.

I told her she's full of shit.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Am4ndaPlz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 02 2017
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Why can't Microsoft Excel properly defecate inside a small jar?

Because it spreadsheet

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HOLY_S-HIT
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 01 2016
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My cousin is an aspiring plumber. He asked me how to be successful.

"Hard work and defecation."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Simounstar
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 20 2020
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They put up an out of order sign on the washroom door...

Or, as they call it, a no-defecation notification.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/OiTheRolk
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 02 2019
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My wife says she can usually tell when our baby is pooping because he's laughing so much.

I guess he just has a self defecating sense of humor.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 36
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/s7evenofspades
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 13 2018
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I've got a bad case of gastro and have been making diarrhea puns...

my wife told me to stop, but I replied that I enjoy self-defecating jokes.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/tokyo-dawn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 06 2019
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I'm suing Ex-Lax...

...for defecation of character. That is of course my constipational right. It's better than sitting on my stool and doing nothing.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Spotted_Lady
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 25 2018
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When you make someone laugh so hard they literally shit themselves.

Self-defecating humor is the best.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/frameRAID
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 27 2018
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A friend joked about the time he soiled himself

I've always liked his self-defecating sense of humor

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Wein33
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 19 2018
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Shit coffee

A year or two back, I was at this coffee farm in Hawaii. In the store, where they sell their coffee, I noticed a jar of Kopi Luwak on display (for those you that don't know, it's coffee that's eaten and defecated by an Asian civet). Because it's kind of a rarity, I was surprised that had a jar of it just sitting on the table. So I asked the older man that worked there if Kopi Luwak was something they sold there. He says, "No, we don't sell that shit here." I died a little inside.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 88
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Cubanise
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 21 2014
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Jokes about pooping your pants:

Self-defecating jokes.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VoxGens
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 30 2015
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