Criminal Record Puns

A list of puns related to "Criminal Record"

I was telling my friend that brown rice is the same as white rice, but with a criminal record....

He thinks I'm a riceist for saying that.

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Nov 29 2020
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A British man is visiting Australia and is asked by the Customs Officer if he has a criminal record.

He replies, 'I didn't think you needed one to get into Australia any more'.

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👤︎ u/tyrannosaur85
📅︎ Jan 05 2020
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I was applying for Australian citizenship and the interviewer asked whether I had a criminal record.

I replied: "No. Is that still a requirement?"

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👤︎ u/BassWizard420
📅︎ Apr 13 2019
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"What's your criminal record?" asked the cop.

I said, "Once I robbed a bank in 24 seconds."

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👤︎ u/TommehBoi
📅︎ Jan 25 2019
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Dad gave me this after my criminal record got expunged. imgur.com/ISEGtLr
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👤︎ u/cr3atur3ofth3wh33l
📅︎ Oct 29 2013
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Found a old jukebox in prison...

It was full of criminal records.

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👤︎ u/chawjubs
📅︎ Sep 12 2020
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It’s really cool that prisoners are now getting juke boxes in their cells.

Seems like a great place for criminal records.

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👤︎ u/coltomatic
📅︎ Aug 24 2018
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A guy sets a world record for farting in a police car the most amount of times in a row. What else did he set?

A criminal record.

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👤︎ u/dusterbusterv1
📅︎ Apr 17 2017
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I was applying for Australian citizenship.

The interviewer asked "Do you have a criminal record?"

"No. Is that still required?"

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👤︎ u/Valdagast
📅︎ Nov 06 2019
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I was applying for an Australian citizenship

When the interviewer asked me ‘Do you have a criminal record?”

I said “No, is that still required?”

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👤︎ u/RealFletch
📅︎ Apr 06 2019
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