β€œWould you like to have sour cream, bacon, and chives on your potato?”

β€œThat’s a loaded question.”

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 02 2018
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I bought an onion. Cutting it burned my eyes so badly I went back to the store to complain.

Strong OP onion

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SandJA1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 16 2021
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My husband asked me to label our new spice rack. I took creative liberties. reddit.com/gallery/j8u7w7
πŸ‘οΈŽ 82
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thefoxclady
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 10 2020
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I thought I heard an onion singing a Bee Gees song.

But it was just a chive talking.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/wimpykidfan37
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 25 2021
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I thought I heard the Bee Gees singing in my herb garden...

But it was just the chives talkin'

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/klwill1192
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 17 2021
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What do you call a gestalt consciousness of plants?

A chive mind.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Vanatrix
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 28 2020
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What happens when an onion has an allergic reaction?

It breaks out in chives

:D

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/peachynabi12
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 13 2020
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Where did the onion find his family history?

In the archives

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/frankiervi
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 02 2020
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I saw an onion ring.

So I answered it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 29
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/forkingbread
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 21 2019
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I was walking past my fridge last night when I thought I heard two onions singing a BeeGees song.

But when I opened the door it was just the chives talking.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mykeuk
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 24 2019
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What happened to the allergic baked potato?

It broke out in chives (Original content, thank you very much)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 33
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pinkyporkchops
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 22 2018
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What did the green grape say to the purple grape?

Breathe, dammit!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 61
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DownwardSpirals
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 18 2016
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I'm allergic to green onions

Every time I eat them, I break out in chives.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 26
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/vaxis2113
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 29 2018
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Where do bees go when they want to pollinate an onion?

To their chive

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/zberry97
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 08 2019
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Daughter made this up. Where do you go to find spices they no longer use?

The Ar-chives.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/werdnadrew
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 15 2017
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We were at Outback Steakhouse...

I asked the waiter what was on a dressed baked potato and my dad chimed in with "a suit and tie". The waiter and I lost it while the rest of my family stared.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/YourShoeIsUntied
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 11 2014
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