What watches over a castle when the sun goes down?

A night

πŸ‘︎ 77
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πŸ‘€︎ u/troutslayer12
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2021
🚨︎ report
Why are bouncy castles getting so expensive?

Because of the inflation

πŸ‘︎ 109
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tahadalal5253
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2021
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I read that in medieval times, if you lost your castle to invaders during a siege, it was incredibly unlikely that you’d get the well-fortified tower area back.

Guys back then were playing for keeps.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/astrosmash77
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the bouncy castle with a size of 10,000 Sq ft area?

The entry is quite expensive, mostly due to inflation.

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2021
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What do castles eat for breakfast?

Moatmeal

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2021
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Bought my wife a castle shaped abacus for her birthday...

It’s the fort that counts

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wavepoolsquad
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2021
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A man's house is his castle

In a manor of speaking

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2020
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I like all Ghibli movies, except for Howl's Moving Castle.

It got old quickly.

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shy_Gal_Skye
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
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How do you break down the gates to the Cookie Castle?

With a batter-ing ram to do it all at once, or you can chocolate chip away at it for a long time.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hornwalker
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
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What cheese goes around castles?

Moatzarella

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thisispeculiar
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
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What did the emporar who lost his castle say?

Its just not my forte.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cmbhatt
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2020
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What happened to the sand just before it became a castle?

It got in pailed.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/clark_creationz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2020
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My daughter wanted a bouncy castle for her birthday. The guy said the rental was $50, and the set-up fee was $1000 dollars.

I said, β€œThat’s outrageous!”

He just shrugged and said, β€œThat’s inflation for you.”

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hughdman
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2018
🚨︎ report
When does the dwarf that is a knight, guard the castle?

Mid-knight.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lord_nikon_burned
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2020
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Why did Anna and Elsa install air dryers in all of the castle bathrooms?

To make it Hans free

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LegendOfKhaos
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2020
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My new pants are like a poorly built castle

No ballroom.

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
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My bouncy castle has almost tripled in value since I bought it

It’s just another product of inflation

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MJspringer
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
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Why does Darth Vader live in a castle on Mustafar and not in the capital?

Because he does not like coarse sand.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Werschweinchen
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the joke about the old castle?

No? It’s historical

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/danielblanchard
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2019
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Just bought a new pair of pants, and they fit like a cheaply made castle.

No ballroom.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mardrom_Bransle
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2019
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There are so many beautiful castles in Wales, but I only had time to visit one.

I chose Caerphilly.

πŸ‘︎ 64
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAnagramancer
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s the difference between an artist’s folder and a castle of antivaxxers?

One is a portfolio and the other is Fort Polio

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Soosoos19926
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2019
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Belongs bere
πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Flor1an_
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
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How do you protect a castle made of cheese?

You build a moatzerella.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NickWilde992
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2018
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What's the best way to get into the Hogwarts castle?

Through the Dumble-door.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/89iroc
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2019
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Dracula's wife is divorcing him because he cheated. She wants it all, the castles the coffins, etc...

She's going to bleed him dry!

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2019
🚨︎ report
The price of bouncy castles has doubled in the past year

That's inflation for you

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/StAnger99
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Castles

My brother and I were told we'd become lords of castles when my father passed. The mischievous old git was true to his word: my brother is now lord of a bouncy castle, and I rule a fairy-tale castle.

He feels let down, but I'm made up!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/clothesbootsmyrrh
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Which cheese surrounds a medieval castle?

Moatzarella.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SirFancii
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2019
🚨︎ report
I went to Transylvania...

...to take a tour of Dracula’s castle. It was closed, and he wasn’t even there. I guess I’ll have to go back when it gets re-vamped.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
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Help me remember the pun I had. For a RPG game I was planning an encounter with a walking brothel/whore house (like howl's moving castle)and the whorehouse had a really punny name.

I can only think of "The bone wanderer", but what I had was better than that and I cant remember it. please make suggestions, and maybe it'll be close enough to spark my memory

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/camerawn
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2018
🚨︎ report
When I first started playing chess, I thought the castle could move diagonally.

Classic rook-y mistake.

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/keithasaurus
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2018
🚨︎ report
I took the kids to a bouncy castle, but it was really expensive compared to last year.

That’s inflation for you.

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2018
🚨︎ report
Explaining castle security to my son.

I tell him how some castle guards would take night shifts.

He said β€œso some knights will sleep all day and wake up and night time?”

Me: β€œyes... they are called... nights...”

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JordanMichael08
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2019
🚨︎ report
People say, "a man's home is his castle"...

In a manor of speaking

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2018
🚨︎ report
What’s a drug dealer in a castle called?

A Druggler.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Budwin64
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a defender of a castle who is too weak? (X-post r/Jokes)

A fortnight

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/akc1999
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2017
🚨︎ report
I'm going to open a pub in a castle.

It shall be called Fort Knightly.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TalisFletcher
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2017
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I just found out that β€œAaarghh” is not a real word.

I can’t express how angry that makes me.

πŸ‘︎ 15k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2018
🚨︎ report
French bombe

Did you hear about the French castle made of cheese that exploded?

There was de-brie everywhere....

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bobbylake71
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I had to take dad shopping for pants....

When asked how they fit he replied: "like a cheaply made castle, no ballroom".

πŸ‘︎ 64
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrBlue08
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do Castle doors have their locks so far above the ground?

Because of the higher-key

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheFifthStep
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2017
🚨︎ report
My wife was disappointed with the castle shaped clock I bought for her birthday....

But it’s the fort that counts.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wavepoolsquad
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I made my son a castle out of a abacus for his birthday

It's the Fort that counts

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/akjohnston87
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
🚨︎ report
My daughter wanted a bouncy castle for her birthday.

The rental was $50, and the set-up fee was $1000 dollars. That's inflation for you...

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/savemoney2121
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2018
🚨︎ report
A man's home is his castle...

In a manor of speaking.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2017
🚨︎ report

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