I was in a cat competition that wasn't like your typical competition. They had a category for cat butts, which I ended up winning...
But it was just a cat-ass-trophy
I finally found a drink that will help me get my butt in shape.
Acetone.
For legal reasons, this is a joke.
If I pay a doctor to stick his finger in my butt...
...does that make him a prostatoot too?
I took my 1 year old to the ER with the flu. As the nurse was taking her temperature rectally with the thermometer in the butt, he sympathized with her misery by saying “I know, it stinks.”
To which I responded “It certainly will when you take it out.” I accepted the long awkward silence that followed as thunderous applause.
What to do, when a pickle get's stuck in your butt?
Oh shit, this isn't Google!
Checking out your butt in a dressing room is just you looking through a rear-view mirror.
Being constipated can be a pain in the butt
My son has been throwing paper darts around and a big one got stuck in my butt crack
To be honest it’s a massive plane in the arse
I got a steroid shot in my butt today...
It was a real pain in the ass...
I lost all feeling in my butt nerves. I'm not joking.
I'm dead ass serious.
Butt how do you get get it in the first place?
If you give Dwayne Johnson an athletic slap in the butt
You’re hitting rock bottom
I found some lettuce stuck in my dog's butt.
Alas, it was only the tip of the iceberg.
Anybody ever smuggle drugs in their butt?
... Cause it sounds like a dope ass job.
Everybody has a hole in their butt...
And anyone who claims they don't, is full of shit.
"Can I borrow your butt? Mine has a crack in it."
A baguette in the butt is a pain in the ass.
Pain is the word for bread in French. I posted this to r/Showerthoughts which did not go over well
Would surprise butt sex for dogs be an "unexpected item in wagging area"?
As I logged into facebook, the first post I saw was an article called "showing your butt in beautiful places is the new trend".
I can get behind that.
i think this bubble butt pic belongs in here... (try and guess what it will be... ) imgur.com/qLpvnaV
A baguette in the butt...
Would be such a pain in the ass
