I've started a boating business from my attic.
The sails are going through the roof.
The 2020 boating expo was crazy
I'm going to bow out of my Introduction to Boating class
The instructor's way too stern!
I was struggling to find a sale on boating equipment. Eventually I did find one.
[True Story] My son had a great day power boating - my wife asked if it all went off without a hitch...
I’m like, that’s nearly impossible!
I was recently in a boating accident...
It was quite an oar-deal.
[request] Boat puns?
Decorating a cardboard boat tomorrow (made it today) and thinking of covering it with different puns. The name shall be Admiralable Saboateur if I go this route, but I'm not sure how to incorporate it all together to make it a theme. I also thought of Aquadisiac and "Are you my armama?" but I'm not sure if the crowd would get the armada reference either. Any boat puns are appreciated!
Three men were onboard a ship playing dice on deck when the oldest man angrily jumped off the front of the boat. The younger man said..
You keeled my father. Prepare two die.
*I sent this to my brother and he replies: Was his name Inyougo?
^(What a freaking professional)
4 men were sitting in a boat about to smoke a cigarette, when they realized they didn't have a cigarette lighter.
So, they threw one cigarette off their boat and the boat became one cigarette lighter.
I bought a sail for my boat on Amazon the other day.
Today it dawned on me that it's not the right size so I called to cancel. They said it's too late.
That sail has shipped.
If your boat flips you can wear it on your head.
I bought a boat half price...
Traveling with my nine year old, and he observed that our gate in Hartford was A6, and our gate in Baltimore is B6. I respond that it's raining so hard we'll take a boat home...
How did Noah fit 2 of every animal in a single boat ?
Have you seen the movie about production methods of boats, planes, and bridges in the 20th century?
I can't remember the name but it's riveting.
Best game to play on a huge boat?
It was easy to justify buying a new boat
Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on their boats?
So when they pull up to port, they can Scandanavian
Apple just announced their new electric vehicle, the iCar, coming in 2024. Rumor is they’re working on a self driving boat as well.
They’re going to call it the iAye
Theres a leek on the boat!
I saw a drunk dude riding in a boat on the chests of four women with average bust size, one of whom had a single mastectomy.
He was sailing on the seven C’s
Did you hear about the guy who went into the Everglades, found this huge sea-cow thing and beat it to death with the oar of his boat?
They're prosecuting him for crimes against a manatee.
Before my surgery today, the anesthesiologist asked if I'd like to be knocked out with gas or he could just hit me over the head with a canoe paddle. So I guess it was...
...an ether/oar situation...
Why do scuba divers fall backwards out of the boat?
Because if they fell forwards, they’d still be in the boat!
The boat is sick
We gotta take it to the dock.
What did the boat say to the pier?
My 8yo daughter made me proud and came up with this: I don't get why pirates go around on boats...
They should be in the arrrrmy
Why did the Viking buy an old boat?
He couldn’t a fjord a new one.
I don't think the author even realized what they did! Context: the article is about killer whales attacking boats.
My friend told me about his new boat. Apparently, it has a canopy.
I said "Well, better than a can o' poo."
Her: whatever floats your boat
Me: Water works the best!
What is the most popular boat in the southern US?
Upon seeing a gorgeous girl at the party, I knew I had to meet her. So I approached and told her about a special-purpose ship designed to move and navigate through frozen waters, and provide safe waterways for other boats and ships.
I've used it before and it works. It's the perfect icebreaker.
The guy who mans the fishing rods on my boat tried to convince me to vote for a candidate. I fired him.
Pole workers aren't allowed to do that!
I was going to row across the Atlantic in a little boat...
Why did the boat know it had a leak?
Just finished resding a great book called "Arguement On The Narrow Boat"
What kind of boat only hauls women's underwear?
Hitler, Stalin, and Mussolini were on a boat.
It was quite a powerful dictator ship.
What do you say to a police officer when he gets on your boat?
Police put on your life vest!
(This is a joke I made up at the age of 6 while on a boat!)
I used to be a fan of boats...
But that ship has sailed.
What do you do with a sick boat?
Things are a-boat to get interesting.
Where does a boat go when it’s sick?
I started a boating business in my attic..
Sails are through the roof.
Why did the viking buy an old boat ?
He couldn't a fjord a new one