I've started a boating business from my attic.

The sails are going through the roof.

πŸ‘︎ 250
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
The 2020 boating expo was crazy

It was mast hysteria

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bridgeheadprod
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01
🚨︎ report
I'm going to bow out of my Introduction to Boating class

The instructor's way too stern!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CIMMGW
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I was struggling to find a sale on boating equipment. Eventually I did find one.

But it was an oar deal.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/friday-the-horse
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2019
🚨︎ report
[True Story] My son had a great day power boating - my wife asked if it all went off without a hitch...

I’m like, that’s nearly impossible!

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tmoneynchange
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2018
🚨︎ report
I was recently in a boating accident...

It was quite an oar-deal.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Lord_Double_D
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2017
🚨︎ report
[request] Boat puns?

Decorating a cardboard boat tomorrow (made it today) and thinking of covering it with different puns. The name shall be Admiralable Saboateur if I go this route, but I'm not sure how to incorporate it all together to make it a theme. I also thought of Aquadisiac and "Are you my armama?" but I'm not sure if the crowd would get the armada reference either. Any boat puns are appreciated!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LivingSecrets
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2017
🚨︎ report
Three men were onboard a ship playing dice on deck when the oldest man angrily jumped off the front of the boat. The younger man said..

You keeled my father. Prepare two die.

*I sent this to my brother and he replies: Was his name Inyougo?

^(What a freaking professional)

πŸ‘︎ 65
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/calvinweight
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
🚨︎ report
4 men were sitting in a boat about to smoke a cigarette, when they realized they didn't have a cigarette lighter.

So, they threw one cigarette off their boat and the boat became one cigarette lighter.

πŸ‘︎ 12k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/icemage27
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I bought a sail for my boat on Amazon the other day.

Today it dawned on me that it's not the right size so I called to cancel. They said it's too late.

That sail has shipped.

πŸ‘︎ 50
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tfowler11
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
🚨︎ report
If your boat flips you can wear it on your head.

Because it capsized.

πŸ‘︎ 38
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VegetarianReaper
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I bought a boat half price...

It was on sail.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Traveling with my nine year old, and he observed that our gate in Hartford was A6, and our gate in Baltimore is B6. I respond that it's raining so hard we'll take a boat home...

...then we'll be C6.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sunstoned1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
🚨︎ report
How did Noah fit 2 of every animal in a single boat ?

State-of-the-Ark technology

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Amart1985
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Have you seen the movie about production methods of boats, planes, and bridges in the 20th century?

I can't remember the name but it's riveting.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Joey_the_Duck
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02
🚨︎ report
Best game to play on a huge boat?

Yacht-zee

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01
🚨︎ report
It was easy to justify buying a new boat

There was a big sail.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PicaRuler
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01
🚨︎ report
Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on their boats?

So when they pull up to port, they can Scandanavian

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gabz09
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
🚨︎ report
Apple just announced their new electric vehicle, the iCar, coming in 2024. Rumor is they’re working on a self driving boat as well.

They’re going to call it the iAye

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RockhardManstrong
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Theres a leek on the boat!
πŸ‘︎ 51
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NathyDre
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I saw a drunk dude riding in a boat on the chests of four women with average bust size, one of whom had a single mastectomy.

He was sailing on the seven C’s

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/serialcompliment
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Leek in the boat
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the guy who went into the Everglades, found this huge sea-cow thing and beat it to death with the oar of his boat?

They're prosecuting him for crimes against a manatee.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Fitz_cuniculus
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Before my surgery today, the anesthesiologist asked if I'd like to be knocked out with gas or he could just hit me over the head with a canoe paddle. So I guess it was...

...an ether/oar situation...

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do scuba divers fall backwards out of the boat?

Because if they fell forwards, they’d still be in the boat!

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/halokost
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
The boat is sick

We gotta take it to the dock.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cosmotheseptic
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?

πŸ‘︎ 84
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/emjay144
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
My 8yo daughter made me proud and came up with this: I don't get why pirates go around on boats...

They should be in the arrrrmy

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ConstableBrew
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the Viking buy an old boat?

He couldn’t a fjord a new one.

πŸ‘︎ 409
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/coadnamedalex
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I don't think the author even realized what they did! Context: the article is about killer whales attacking boats.
πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Comanch3
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend told me about his new boat. Apparently, it has a canopy.

I said "Well, better than a can o' poo."

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SuicidalNomad
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Her: whatever floats your boat

Me: Water works the best!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/starwars93
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the most popular boat in the southern US?

A yawl.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Upon seeing a gorgeous girl at the party, I knew I had to meet her. So I approached and told her about a special-purpose ship designed to move and navigate through frozen waters, and provide safe waterways for other boats and ships.

I've used it before and it works. It's the perfect icebreaker.

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
🚨︎ report
A moored boat called Maud. imgur.com/GA8hgZy
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/boobamajugs
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
🚨︎ report
The guy who mans the fishing rods on my boat tried to convince me to vote for a candidate. I fired him.

Pole workers aren't allowed to do that!

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
I was going to row across the Atlantic in a little boat...

But I bottled it.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/trendfoll
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the boat know it had a leak?

That sinking feeling...

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Just finished resding a great book called "Arguement On The Narrow Boat"

By R.G.Bargee.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
What kind of boat only hauls women's underwear?

A pantiliner!

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CognitiveNerd1701
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Hitler, Stalin, and Mussolini were on a boat.

It was quite a powerful dictator ship.

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mush_Tilly
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you say to a police officer when he gets on your boat?

Police put on your life vest!

(This is a joke I made up at the age of 6 while on a boat!)

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NoLoMoXI
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I used to be a fan of boats...

But that ship has sailed.

πŸ‘︎ 108
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/OhTheComedy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you do with a sick boat?

Take it to the doc.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jigsatics
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Things are a-boat to get interesting.
πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ramachetan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Where does a boat go when it’s sick?

The dock!

πŸ‘︎ 123
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Fonz136
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I started a boating business in my attic..

Sails are through the roof.

πŸ‘︎ 56
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GigaMike123
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the viking buy an old boat ?

He couldn't a fjord a new one

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.