I showed up late to the Kleptomaniacs Anonymous meeting.

Needless to say, all the seats were already taken.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jfshay
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 11 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call alcoholics anonymous in Canada?

Eh eh

πŸ‘οΈŽ 33
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 24 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the hardest part in joining Hypochondriacs Anonymous?

Admitting you don’t have a problem.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 65
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Names redacted for anonymity, of course.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 245
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/LordOysteryn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous.

I see a few new faces this week and I must say I’m disappointed.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ThaCrimsonChinn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 02 2020
🚨︎ report
This support group will help you recharge
πŸ‘οΈŽ 82
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/habsfan1112
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 06 2021
🚨︎ report
I went to the local Kleptomaniacs Anonymous meeting last night

but all the seats were taken.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 78
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Welcome to plastic surgery anonymous.

I'm seeing a lot of new faces in the crowd tonight and I just have to say I'm really disappointed

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hayeshilton
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I've just got back from Schizophrenics Anonymous.

I can't wait to tell myself all about it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 40
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Funny 'Dads Anonymous' story to share for the holiday weekend.

"Welcome everyone to Dads Anonymous. Again my name is Bill and you will notice that we have a new member, please welcome Gary -- Can you tell us what brought you to us today?"

"Well I have a very embarrassing confession. It's even hard to get the words out."

Bill reassures him, "We are all dads here and have been meeting for decades, we've been through all the highs and lows, births and deaths, tragedies, we've heard it all. Just tell us what's on your mind son, we are here to support each other."

"Well, a couple months ago, I broke both my legs in a motorcycle accident and couldn't walk, so I let my wife use the lawnmower." He says through the sobs...

Bob, one of the other dads, starts to get pale. "...and she didn't even cut it in a crisp geometric pattern, it was just random..." Bob starts to sweat and get dry heaves. "YOU BASTARD", he screams. "HOW COULD YOU LET THAT HAPPEN." The dads rise and get ready to beat the crap out of Gary, when Bill stands between them and breaks it up.

"Guys! Guys, we all get weak sometimes and things happen outside our control. Doug, you remember when you were in recovering from Chemo and you gave your wife a hammer, and she used it to hammer a roofing nail into the drywall to hang a picture!" Doug, looks down in shame, "Yes, that was a bad day, I was so weak. She missed the stud and left a dent in the wall, and she just hung the picture over it, crooked!" There was dead silence. "Thats ok Doug, it was twenty years ago, you were young and foolish, you can let it go". Then all the dads shook hands and sat back down.

Bill starts the meeting up again. Then Gary says, "..theres one more thing, Right after I got out of the hospital, she wanted to make a special dinner for us, so I let her grill the steaks..." "OH LORD THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!" screams Dave, another dad, his face turning red. Gary continues "...she burnt them one one side and they were dry and chewy." Now there is a bedlam, one dad immediately passes out cold, chairs are thrown, broken bottles, Gary is on the ground being kicked in the ribs. After a few tense minutes Bill managed to get the dads off of Gary. "Stop it, Dave you're killing him. Come on, you remember that time you let your wife go to the repair shop for an oil change?" Dave hung his head, and muttered yeah. "They convinced her to change the cabin filter, wiper blades and the radiator collant..." Bill kept prodding "and, aaand" ...Dave broke down, "and she bought a jug of blinker fluid!" T

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I'm going out with a group of friends from OCD anonymous tonight.

Things aren't gonna get messy.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I forgot to go to Hypochondriacs Anonymous today.

I bet it's early-onset Alzheimer's.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 27
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 12 2020
🚨︎ report
It is a very little known fact that Boy George has an anonymous Reddit account

You might say he is a karma chameleon

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheyCallMeDrAsshole
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 25 2020
🚨︎ report
β€œOil on canvas”——Anonymous Artist, circa 21st century.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 212
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 28 2018
🚨︎ report
β€œOil on Canvas.”—- Anonymous Artist, circa 21st century.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 18 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call an anonymous internet creep?

Torpedo.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pdxp2b
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I've joined Alcoholics Anonymous.

I now drink under a different name.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Candidates for the president of the Evolution Society said that the anonymous votes were fudged...

But the committee assured them it was just natural selection!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/space0watch
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 25 2019
🚨︎ report
I went to gamblers anonymous the other day.

They gave me 2-to-1 odds I wouldn’t make it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cerebolic-parabellum
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 15 2020
🚨︎ report
"Hello, My name is Dave and I'm addicted to baby powder "

Talcoholics Anonymous.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 21 2021
🚨︎ report
Just trying to keep people safe (bad cropping for anonymity)
πŸ‘οΈŽ 42
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CaseAub12
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 11 2018
🚨︎ report
I just got kicked out of Hypochondriacs Anonymous.

I just couldn’t admit I didn’t have a problem.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 02 2019
🚨︎ report
β€œHello Police, I would like to leave an anonymous tip.”

Dispatcher: Go ahead.

Man: Vaccinations don’t cause autism.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 18 2019
🚨︎ report
The Russian people anxiously awaited the results of their anonymous election...

Sorry, not Czar E.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/IO_you_new_socks
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 06 2017
🚨︎ report
I am not with alcoholics anonymous

but something synonymous to alcoholic

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SeeWhatEyeSee
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 25 2018
🚨︎ report
I've been Internet hacking for almost thirty years, and now I want to give it up.

Can someone point me to an Anonymous Anonymous group?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 67
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Naitraen
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 14 2020
🚨︎ report
AA meeting
πŸ‘οΈŽ 4k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/moses10960
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Say what you want about the group Anonymous, they've written some beautiful poetry over the years.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RyanRebalkin
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 14 2018
🚨︎ report
I went to Premature Ejaculators Anonymous but nobody was there.

I guess I came too soon.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 82
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hasoon004
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 21 2014
🚨︎ report
After 40 years, I met my long lost twin brother at a Gamblers Anonymous meeting last night...

What are the odds!!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 55
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 28 2017
🚨︎ report
So I would have had my procrastinators anonymous meeting tomorrow

But they keep putting it off

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/QXander
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 31 2018
🚨︎ report
Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous.

I see a few new faces here this week and I must say I am very disappointed.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 133
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NYRion7
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I showed up late to the Kleptomaniacs Anonymous meeting.

Needless to say, all the seats were already taken.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 132
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jfshay
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous.

I see a few new faces here this week and I must say I am very disappointed.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 436
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/iateaps4
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Hypochondriacs anonymous

Step#1 admitting you don't have a problem.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I showed up at the weekly Kleptomaniacs Anonymous meeting...

...but all the seats were already taken.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/KoronaSenpai
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous.

I see a few new faces here this week and I must say I am very disappointed.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 39
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CulturedGrass
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 06 2019
🚨︎ report
I showed up late to last night's meeting of Kleptomaniacs Anonymous.

All of the seats were already taken.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jfshay
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I showed up at the weekly Kleptomaniacs Anonymous meeting...

...but all the seats were already taken.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 56
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jfshay
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 11 2019
🚨︎ report
Welcome to plastic surgery addiction anonymous

I'm seeing a lot of new faces this week, and I have to say I'm disappointed.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/4mouldyoranges
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous

I see a few new faces here this week and I must say that I'm disappointed.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Mo_Stache_
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Welcome to Plastic Surgery Addicts Anonymous

I'm seeing a lot of new faces here in the crowd this week and I have to say I am very disappointed.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 66
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DemonMango
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous

I see a few new faces here this week and I must say I am very disappointed

πŸ‘οΈŽ 26
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DallasDomino0806
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous. I see a few new faces here this week and I must say I’m disappointed.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 62
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/frenzy3
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 24 2018
🚨︎ report
I just went to a Plastic Surgery Addicts Anonymous meet up...

and boy, did I see a lot of new faces!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 195
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/tosil
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 28 2017
🚨︎ report
Welcome to Plastic Surgery Anonymous!

I see we have a lot of new faces this week.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MelkorHimself
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 04 2019
🚨︎ report
I just got kicked out of Hypochondriacs Anonymous.

I had a hard time admitting I didn’t have a problem.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 16 2018
🚨︎ report

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