Advent Calendar Puns

He got 25 days!

It feels like their days are numbered.

because you know their days are numbered.

Because it's the most punderful time of the year!

Link to calendar for those who want it: https://pdfhost.io/v/TQuSCzy.W_AdventCalendar2020pdf.pdf

....there's only 3 days left till Xmas

Cause they can't decide who's responsible for opening the doors.

Dad: I'm gonna get a Oscar Pistorious Advent Calendar, because there's a shot behind every door.

God my Dads jokes get worse and worse... :P

Who would do that to another person's Advent Calendar?!

The winner and the 9 runner ups: "I keep randomly shouting out 'Broccoli' and 'Cauliflower' - I think I might have florets"

• "Someone stole my antidepressants. Whoever they are, I hope they're happy" - Richard Stott
• "What's driving Brexit? From here it looks like it's probably the Duke of Edinburgh" - Milton Jones
• "A cowboy asked me if I could help him round up 18 cows. I said, 'Yes, of course. - That's 20 cows'" - Jake Lambert
• "A thesaurus is great. There's no other word for it" - Ross Smith
• "Sleep is my favourite thing in the world. It's the reason I get up in the morning" - Ross Smith
• "I accidentally booked myself onto an escapology course; I'm really struggling to get out of it" - Adele Cliff
• "After learning six hours of basic semaphore, I was flagging - Richard Pulsford
• "To be or not to be a horse rider, that is Equestrian" - Mark Simmons
• "I've got an Eton-themed advent calendar, where all the doors are opened for me by my dad's contacts" - Ivo Graham

They were discussing an advent calendar which had angered people because the part of Baby Jesus was played by a sausage.

One of the panelists, I think Mo Rocca, quipped that people were frank-incensed.

I need your best/worst cracker jokes for a groanworthy advent calendar I'm making last minute.

Help!

I was munching down on chocolate from my advent calendar, having forgotten to eat the previous couple day's pieces. My mom notices and says:

"Is this your way of saying youre too old for advent calendars?" (I'm eighteen)

"No, Im just bad with dates."

My dad speaks up:

"Is that why youre single?" Then laughs together with my mom.

Talking about Christmas, and advent calendars. Then my work colleague comes up with this incredibly cheesy line:

"I think advent calendars aren't as popular in this country nowadays. maybe they are past their time and their days are numbered!"