He got 25 days!
It feels like their days are numbered.
Because it's the most punderful time of the year!
Link to calendar for those who want it: https://pdfhost.io/v/TQuSCzy.W_AdventCalendar2020pdf.pdf
because you know their days are numbered.
There is only 3 days till Xmas.
Did water vaporate?
Foiled again.
Cause they can't decide who's responsible for opening the doors.
Because they keep breaking on through to the other side
Dad: I'm gonna get a Oscar Pistorious Advent Calendar, because there's a shot behind every door.
God my Dads jokes get worse and worse... :P
Who would do that to another person's Advent Calendar?!
The winner and the 9 runner ups: "I keep randomly shouting out 'Broccoli' and 'Cauliflower' - I think I might have florets"
- "Someone stole my antidepressants. Whoever they are, I hope they're happy" - Richard Stott
- "What's driving Brexit? From here it looks like it's probably the Duke of Edinburgh" - Milton Jones
- "A cowboy asked me if I could help him round up 18 cows. I said, 'Yes, of course. - That's 20 cows'" - Jake Lambert
- "A thesaurus is great. There's no other word for it" - Ross Smith
- "Sleep is my favourite thing in the world. It's the reason I get up in the morning" - Ross Smith
- "I accidentally booked myself onto an escapology course; I'm really struggling to get out of it" - Adele Cliff
- "After learning six hours of basic semaphore, I was flagging - Richard Pulsford
- "To be or not to be a horse rider, that is Equestrian" - Mark Simmons
- "I've got an Eton-themed advent calendar, where all the doors are opened for me by my dad's contacts" - Ivo Graham
They were discussing an advent calendar which had angered people because the part of Baby Jesus was played by a sausage.
One of the panelists, I think Mo Rocca, quipped that people were frank-incensed.
I need your best/worst cracker jokes for a groanworthy advent calendar I'm making last minute.
Help!
Afterwards, the bar was pretty un-adventful.
I was munching down on chocolate from my advent calendar, having forgotten to eat the previous couple day's pieces. My mom notices and says:
"Is this your way of saying youre too old for advent calendars?" (I'm eighteen)
"No, Im just bad with dates."
My dad speaks up:
"Is that why youre single?" Then laughs together with my mom.
Talking about Christmas, and advent calendars. Then my work colleague comes up with this incredibly cheesy line:
"I think advent calendars aren't as popular in this country nowadays. maybe they are past their time and their days are numbered!"
....there's only 3 days left till Xmas
