Is it the time to adopt glass coffins?

remains to be seen!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/malhosainy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
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Why did the cowboy adopt a dachshund?

Someone told him to β€œget along little doggie”

πŸ‘︎ 800
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CptLeelooSattler
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
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If a male owl's sibling adopts a baboon,

then owl be a monkey's uncle.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Iceman838
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
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What did the skeleton say to his wife when he wanted to adopt a child?

I have some bones to pick with you.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Doomage007
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2020
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Never adopt a dog from a blacksmith.

We did, and within an hour he'd made a bolt for the door

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Baconlessness
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2020
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Why do Chinese couples adopt caucasian children?

Because two Wongs don’t make a White

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dose172
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2020
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A friend of mine asked me to adopt some baby cows, and I agreed.

What can I say, I’m always willing to raise the steaks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DifferentNoodles
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2019
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My son suggested to my parents that they should adopt twin girls. I said,

"Do you want aunts? Cause that's how you get aunts!"

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dlordcletus
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
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If a transgender adopts a child, he/she will become transparent.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KnightRadiant17
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2018
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A cowboy was looking to adopt a dog, so he got a dachshund

He got a long little doggie.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Advnchur
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2019
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I took my daughter to adopt a cat at the shelter. I was surprised we had to sign an itemized legal contract with expected costs. When I told the clerk I thought rescuing a cat would be free...

She told me ”Dad, If you want a cat, you should expect a fee line.” I’m so proud!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tarynxm
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2019
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My wife and I decided to adopt a kid from Germany but all he would talk about is sausages...

What a brat.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2019
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I wish someone adopts my grades.

I can't raise them on my own.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sagarkaniche
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2019
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My city has developed an "Adopt a Highway" program...

They wouldn't allow me to adopt easy street...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2019
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If you adopt a child, can you still tell dad jokes?

Yes, but they are not that original.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sleepynotsleazy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2017
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This three legged doggo, whom i wish I could adopt, has a great photography pun name, not too mention a badass story victoriahumanesociety.com…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/StoutGirdy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2017
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My dad adopts an alter ego any time he farts

He starts shadow boxing and proclaiming he is "Gaseous Clay" and "he is the greatest"

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jty87
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2016
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My roommate knows I have sleep trouble and want to adopt a dog....

Told me the only dog I need is a sleep lab

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2016
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What did the skeleton say to his wife when he wanted to adopt a child?

I've got some bones to pick with you.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Doomage007
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2020
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Why'd the cowboy adopt a daschund?

To get a long little doggie.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OhioTry
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2019
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Why did the cowboy adopt a Dachshund?

He wanted to get a long little doggie

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MilPens
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2018
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Why did the cowboy adopt a miniature dachshund?

Because he wanted to get a long lil doggie.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chickinkyiv
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2017
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