Why did the blind guy fall into the well?
Because he didn't see that well.
What's the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle?
Today someone bought our department a box of donuts and some lotto tickets. The potential grand prize was $3,000, in which my boss exclaimed "Well that isn't enough to retire".
I corrected him by saying that is plenty of money to buy some new tires for your car.
The physical pain on his face was priceless.
Well.. We made another trip around the sun.
But it's the earth's rotation that really makes my day.
Keep cows well hydrated
Otherwise, they turn into real jerkies.
Well I walked right into that one didn't I
At the office barbecue, I grilled some rare steak for our boss, and he said, “I like it well done.”
I said, “Thanks. That means a lot.”
Eight days in and this year looks like it might be as bad as last year. Possibly even worse. If it does turn out worse, well, you know what they say...
Did you think 2020’s done with you? Well you’re wrong!
Because next year is 2022
Why do Canadian geese go well with mashed potatoes?
Because they make nice gray-V's.
Well, it's that time on New Year's Eve. I'll see you all...
Kids want to know why I named my new guinea pig Moresby, well..
Because it’s papa’s new guinea
When you're driving but can't see that well...
Pretty much the first dad joke I've ever seen that requires a video punchline.
https://i.imgur.com/pfZya7P.gifv
Originally posted to /r/IdiotsInCars/ by /u/My_Memes_Will_Cure_U
Me: So, what do you do for a living? Ornithologist: Well, I’m an ornithologist.
Me: Oh, really? Knock, knock!
Ornithologist: Who’s there?
Me: Woodpeckers.
Ornithologist: Woodpeckers who?
Me: No, that’s the owl. And you call yourself an ornithologist?
Well I mean I would be mad...
well, you know what they say... when life gives you melons...
You’re probably dislexic.
What do you call a guy who fell into a well?
Well, I decked the Halls today...
They kept coming over singing those damn Christmas carols. Bah humbug!
We live in Colorado and took my son outside today to play hide and seek for the first time. I pointed at the Rockies, looked him dead in the eye and said, "Under no circumstances can we allow them to play!" Confused, he ask why, so I explained, "Well, you see...
People keep telling me to use my energy well...
Does anyone know where I can get a mana pool?
What’s the difference between a well dressed man and a tired out dog?
One wears a suit and the other just pants.
The orange juice industry is not doing very well.
Tomorrow they will give a special press release.
What do you call a well educated Englishman napping?
Well, twenty-twenty's over...
I guess that means twenty-twenty won.
Apple just announced their new electric vehicle, the iCar, coming in 2024. Rumor is they’re working on a self driving boat as well.
They’re going to call it the iAye
A man and his son had a farm, but things weren't going too well.
The son said "I think we need to start growing something other than just wheat" and started naming fruits and vegetables.
"I think you're right, kiddo" said the man.
He went over to one of the haybales and started grabbing fistfuls of it. He spread it out and then started covering it with dirt.
"Dad, what are you doing?" asked the son, confused.
"I'm making straw-buries".
What did the well driller sing to his customers when he couldn't find water for them.
What do you call a well informed wolf ?
A husband and wife were at a marriage counselor. The wife complained, "he only talks about Star Wars! I've had it. I'm leaving him!" The counselor turned to the husband: "well?"
The husband looked at his wife and said, "divorce is strong with this one."
What's the difference between a well dressed man on a bicycle and a poorly dressed man on a tricycle?
Why did the partially blind man fall into a well?
Because he could not see that well.
Why did the farmer fall in the well?
Because he didn’t see that well.
Why did the old man fall in the well?
Because he couldn't see that well!
What's the difference between a well-dressed man on a bicycle, and a poorly-dressed man on a unicycle?
Why did the old man fall in the well
He couldn’t see that well
Why did the blind man fall in the well?
Because he couldn’t see that well
What’s the difference between a well dressed man on a bicycle and a poorly dressed man on a unicycle?
Why did the blind man fall in the well?
Because he couldn’t see that well
Why did the blind guy fall into the well?
Because he didn't see that well!
Why did the legally blind guy fall into the well?
Because he didn’t see that well.
Why did the old man fall in the well?
Because he couldn't see that well!
What’s the difference between a well dressed man on a unicycle and a badly dressed man on a bicycle?
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
