He said it blows.
He said "I love it"
A kid was manning the pump and I asked if they take cards He replies with a straight face : No we give it back after swiping
But it's a bore
So my wife just got her breast pump all set up. She's got the double suckers rolling, tits out, milk flowing like a minor tributary. And I ASK "ARE YOU PUMPED?!" fucking genius.... She stared silently for like 10 seconds. Then told me to post here.
The nine button wasn’t working.
He was a type 2 superconductor
(Actual joke told by my dad today)
It’s because of inflation
He told me he deCAPitated it.
"Don't be upset, you're just compensating for inflation."
"I guess they don't want us to leave any of our crap."
Wife: Last time I bought these, they were packaged 3 to a pack, but now they only come 2 per pack. Me: Sheesh....talk about inflation.
I bought a new pump today for €10. That exact pump was only €8 last year, but that's inflation for you.
"You just press this button ... IT'S GUNNA BLOW!!"
Followed by embarrassed teen noises.
My dad was telling me all the fancy features and telling me how efficient it is compared to our old gas furnace.
Me: Well it sounds like we are going to saving a bunch of money on our heating bill! That's awesome.
Dad: yeah it's super efficient. So I'm pretty pumped!
Dad: shit eating grin and a good chuckle
Me: god dammit dad