A robot from the future decided to avoid eliminating its target for as long as possible
I tried to walk into a Target Store today...
Maybe they should CRISPR target Coronavirus with a bunch of memes and hope it goes viral
Scientists developed a male birth control gel but it only targets the X/Y chromosome
Theyre calling it "Son-Block"
Two ninjas are sneaking up on their target when one of the ninjas asks the other: "do you think you can hit him from here?" and the ninja says:
Why did the machine gunner keep missing his targets?
He suffered from turret syndrome.
Picking my cousin up from work at Target, asked her if she's in Style this week (fitting room/clothing)
Her dad said "she's never in style, she's always out of style. Her clothes never look good"!
I bought a globe at Target...
I put it on the conveyor, and when the cashier picked it up to scan it, I said, “be careful! That means the world to me!”
Why didn’t the light rain hit the target?
A woman checks out of target with two apples, a banana, and a quart of ice cream. The cashier asks, “Are you single?” The woman replies, “Yes, how could you tell?”
What did the sniper say when asked why he couldn't kill his target when he realized it was his long lost best friend?
guess you could call her a missile because she really homed in on her target
I always use avocados in target practice...
I guess you could make some Glockamole.
Why did the thief target the local pizza shop??
Because they are rolling in the dough..
Why does Harry Potter only shop at Target?
Because he hates Waldemart.
Saw these two magazines next to each other at Target and couldn’t help myself.
Walking past the maternity department at Target, I said to my wife...
"It's great that they have clothes for both expecting parents"
https://i.imgur.com/n9YPBrD.jpg
Seems there's been a lot of coverage about a serial pick-pocketer that targets little people
How could anyone stoop so low?
I met with my friend who said he developed a weapon to harness the wind and propel it like a bullet. We took turns firing at a target he had in his yard...
My dog bit off my cat's tail off today. My dad said I should take the cat to Target
Since they are such a good retailer
What do you call it when you go to Target and leave without buying anything?
Why do aliens always target farms?
Because they have a tractor beam.
Just got my wife at the Target
So I just had surgery and one of my restrictions is that I can't lift anything heavier than 20 lbs. Was at the Target today with the wife to return a lamp that she had purchased but then decided she didn't like. She parked the SUV and I opened the back to carry the lamp on the store. She said "What are you doing? You aren't supposed to lift anything!" I replied, "But it's light!"
Got the triple whammy. The groan, eye roll, and disgusted walk away from me and into the store. Had to carry the lamp, but it was worth it.
How did the blind man get healed at Target
Who always hits their target, but only after a delay?
Target now selling canned frozen soup
I told my wife this and then showed her this that I found on a recent trip to Target.
https://imgur.com/gallery/tG3An8G
Daughter was running through Target
when she slipped and fell on her butt. She got up and brushed it off and my husband asked her if she was ok. When she said yes he replied, "are you sure? Because it looks like your butt has a crack."
Instant eye roll.
I always eat lunch at Target....
A dad and son are at Target when the boy says “look menswear”
Dad: men swear only when they stub their toes on a table.
Why did the pistol miss its target?
I just gave a friend a Target gift card...
"Don't spend it all in one place"
I own a business where two folks jump from a plane and compete to hit the most targets as they fall to Earth.
It's called Pair a' Shooters
Little brother dadjoked me in Target
LB: Why are the soda dispensers out of order?
Me: Something is broken and it hasn't been fixed yet.
LB: But they can just reorganize it!
A Target cashier commented on my purchase
I was buying Goat Simulator as a gag gift for a friend. The cashier looks at it and I smile uncomfortably. He says, "Don't be sheepish about buying this".
I just got a job working in the apparel department for Target!
My friends tell me that it suits me well.
Fiance and I walk into Target
He runs ahead of me, stops, turns around, and stands there waiting for me to catch up.
"I just got a great preview...of you walking down the aisle to me."
Gonna make a great dad someday.
I tried walking into target but...
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