19 Hilarious Sleeve Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

What did the general have up his sleeves

His armies!

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📅︎ Oct 28 2020

My friend has peg on his short sleeve shirt for balancing small white balls on when he wants to whack them with a club...

He always wears his tee-shirt when golfing.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline

📅︎ Sep 07 2020

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So I was rolling coins from my tip money and placing the rolled up sleeves on each other forming a kind of pyramid shape:

My sister walks up to me and asks: “Are you creating a pyramid scheme?”

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👤︎ u/ColinHenrichon

📅︎ Jun 05 2020

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A guy with flame tattoo sleeves walks into a building. Security stops him and says,

There are no firearms allowed in this building.

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👤︎ u/Quint_Cordewener

📅︎ Jun 12 2019

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Right up my sleeve

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👤︎ u/AgentAqua7897

📅︎ Feb 01 2020

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Just became an American so I cut off all my sleeves

Since I now have the right to bare arms

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👤︎ u/Teddy4Prez

📅︎ Feb 01 2020

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My friend lied about creating a cloth that can easily be ripped to remove sleeves...

It was a tearable fabrication!

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline

📅︎ Nov 03 2019

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Got a couple Twix up my sleeve.

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👤︎ u/InstantKorma

📅︎ Oct 09 2018

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I was watching football with my 11 year old son and wearing a short sleeve shirt. He said, "Dad, you have as much hair on your arms as I have on my head." I said,

"even more interesting, you have as much hair on your arms as I have on my head."

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👤︎ u/whosevelt

📅︎ Sep 29 2019

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Looking for puns on full/long sleeves.

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👤︎ u/var_lock99

📅︎ Mar 10 2019

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I have a few twix up my sleeve.

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👤︎ u/faisalhassanx

📅︎ Apr 20 2017

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[from a chat] friend: really random side note: my sleeve smells like jam and idk why

Me: were you having a jamboree earlier?

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👤︎ u/reeper147

📅︎ Mar 31 2019

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I asked my Dad why he had a third sleeve in his jumper

He said “Well there’s no ‘arm in it”

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👤︎ u/pip_goes_pop

📅︎ May 11 2018

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Magicians have rabbits in their hats because they have Trix up their sleeves.

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👤︎ u/Ericmc80

📅︎ Jun 04 2018

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I'm just going to sleeve this here.

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👤︎ u/alexan1an

📅︎ Nov 28 2013

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I wear a jacket with no sleeves when I'm serious about what I'm doing.

That way you know I'm in-vest-ed.

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👤︎ u/RichNCrispy

📅︎ Mar 18 2017

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I guess I've just never read a Hot Pocket sleeve before...

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👤︎ u/idkmybffyossarian

📅︎ Nov 19 2013

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I'm going to design decorative sleeves that go over women's handbags and call them...

... Hot Purse Suits

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👤︎ u/psychopathic_rhino

📅︎ Nov 02 2014

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Working at a restaurant, always have a few jokes up my sleeve.

Working as a waiter, I have a couple of wonderful/awful/wonderfully awful jokes when customers place an order. For example...

"Can I please have the rabbit pasta?"

"Oh I'm not sure I'd recommend that, there have been numerous complaints about a hare in their food."

And for the steaks...

"How would you like that cooked?"

"Well done."

"Thanks, but I'm just doing my job."

I either get laughs, confused looks or groans; most of the time I get a combination of the three. But since I'm childless (19 seems a tad young) I have to get my dad jokes out somehow.

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👤︎ u/delusion-of-adequacy

📅︎ May 14 2014

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