half-baked pastry puns

Coming up with pastry puns is easy as pie. Seriously, it's a cakewalk. Carrots and nuts can loaf around but figs are barred. I'm on a roll here, but I gotta stop, turnover a new leaf. One cannoli hope. Scone be pretty hard, dough.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SumGai984
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2015
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What do good pastry shops and cats have in common.

Great whiskers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jgpitre
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2021
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A weeping pastry...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MartianGlassner
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2021
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What kind of pastries do quarterbacks hate?

Turnovers

GO BROWNS!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/meatfish
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2021
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What do you call a pastry that uses a thesaurus?

A synonym roll.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tacobellforlyfe
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
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My French pastry machine doesn't work anymore.

It shot crepes

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SplashbackDeuce
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2021
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What do you call it when you have to quickly eat a beef dish wrapped in pastry crust?

A brief Wellington

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Giraffaery
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
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I brought over the wrong pastries to my relatives' house for Christmas brunch

Now I'm stuck with a bunch of cross-aunts

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Saltycook
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
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What do you call a superpower that lets you locate french pastries with your mind?

Γ‰clairvoyance

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πŸ‘€︎ u/_stevel
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
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I was stalked by a pastry chef once.

He was a real crepe.

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
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Did you hear about the overworked pastry chef?

He suffered a mental bake-down

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πŸ‘€︎ u/berninicaco3
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2020
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That French pastry chef makes me so uncomfortable.

To be honest, he gives me the crepes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mcslims
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2020
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I've been told I can eat more pastries than anyone else.

Well, if the choux fits...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Porkpenknife
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
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How do pastries fight?

They Γ©clair war.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MetalMan3663
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
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What pastry tried to take over the world?

Attila the Bun

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PHATstuFF21
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
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I remember dressing up as a breakfast pastry for one of my high school plays.

It was a sweet role.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
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My wife yelled at me after I ate all of our English pastries

Hell hath no fury like a woman sconed

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PygmeePony
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2020
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Why was the pastry chef nervous about making 100 cakes in a day?

It was a high whisk situation

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πŸ‘€︎ u/weathermancam12
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2020
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When making pastries, you wouldn't want to overdough the kneading
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πŸ‘€︎ u/coffinedude
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2020
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I've heard the german army only liked one type of pastry.

The luft-waffle

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πŸ‘€︎ u/YKantSpiel66
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2020
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Which ninja turtle likes pastries?

Donutello

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πŸ‘€︎ u/steelkamote
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2020
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I once had crush on a pastry chef

Turns out she didn’t have any fillings for me

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
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I don't get what's the big deal in making a pastry?

It's a piece of cake

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dadNigga
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2020
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[At an Indian restaurant] Dad: β€œThese triangular pastries with spicy filling are excellent!”

Waiter: Samosa?

Dad: No thanks. I’m already full.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2019
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What do you call a fish that only eats pastry?

A pie-ranha

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MakeMeADonut
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
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β€ͺAn evil French chef mixes Kryptonite in their treats and flings them at Superman. Batman arrives on the scene but does nothing, allowing Jimmy Olsen to catch the pastries in a net, at which point Superman saves the day. It’s like they say:

Not all heroes snare crepes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/atruthtellingliar
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
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What breakfast pastry willfully causes more pain and suffering than a donut?

A crueller

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πŸ‘€︎ u/yahtzee44444
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
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What do you say to the waiter who takes forever to bring your fancy pastry?

β€œHey!! Torte us!!!!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2019
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You could say I eat my pastries in...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/razzlesnazzlepasz
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2016
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What did the loan shark tell the pastry chef as he was choking?

Cough up the dough

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2019
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The pastry that comes with a thesaurus
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πŸ‘€︎ u/journeyman369
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2015
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I asked my Italian friend if I could have a few of his Star Wars themed pastries

but he said I can have only one cannoli

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ltdansicecream1
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2018
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I don't think a vegetarian pastry chef would survive,

they couldn't go more than a day or so without bacon.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shitty_Orangutan
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2018
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My pastry making business failed terribly.

We never managed to have a good turnover.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2018
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How does a pastry chef tell a dog to leave the kitchen?

CHOUX!

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2018
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What's the fastest pastry?

S'cone

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dravalo
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2019
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What do you call a slice of cheese flavored pastry?

A pizza cake.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DForce5289
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2019
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What did the German pieces of cookie dough say to the pastry chef?

Viscous

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BinaryPeach
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2019
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How do you call a pastry chef who came up with a new recipe for a cake?

A pieoneer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/blaaaablaaaa
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2019
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What kind of pastries can you buy from a Tryan-thesaurus-rex?

Synonym Rolls

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MC_Queen
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2018
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What pastry wanted to rule the world?

Attila the Bun

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScratPacc
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2020
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