Not to brag, but yesterday I beat our local chess champion in less than 5 moves.
Finally my high school Karate lessons came to some use.
“Dad, did you remember to move the clocks forward last night?”
‘Yeah, but they fell off the shelf.”
"I’ve managed not to move for an entire week"
"What do you want, atrophy?"
What do cowboys use to move from state to state?
I'd really like to move to Switzerland one day
I hear the flag's a real plus.
While I was gardening a potato was watching me and criticizing my every move. He thought he was big stuff.
But I think he was just a commontater
What do you call a spider with outdated dance moves?
Laying on the grass...”two tired”...to move
People ask me why the notepad on my desk never moves
I tell them it’s stationary
Finland is offering foreign tech workers the chance to relocate to the Nordic country for 90 days to see if they want to make the move permanent.
If they don't, after the 90 days they will finnish being Finnish
How does an avocado move?
The flag is not the only reason to move to Switzerland
What do you call the 2nd richest man, when he moves to Mexico?
I asked some clams to help me move but all they wanted to do was sit there and breathe seawater.
I told them they were just being shellfish.
I invented a car that moves only when the driver is silent....
It goes without saying...
Which lawn decorations move around from yard to yard?
Gnomads.
(I'm not a dad but I came up with this one last year and have been dying to share it.)
What do you win if you don't move a single muscle all week?
Today morning when I stood on the weighing scale it didn't move at all
My friend said that its impossible for a river to move through the desert.
I told him he was in deNile.
How do actors move around film sets?
Which country did Usain Bolt move to after his retirement?
Upon seeing a gorgeous girl at the party, I knew I had to meet her. So I approached and told her about a special-purpose ship designed to move and navigate through frozen waters, and provide safe waterways for other boats and ships.
I've used it before and it works. It's the perfect icebreaker.
Once, I agreed to help Death move his couch to his new place.
After we got there, I realized I forgot those things you’re supposed to sit on. There were reaper cushions.
What do you call a pig's karate moves?
Pork chops. (Credit to my baby sister who just told me this.)
What do you call a donkey that refuses to move?
I told my dad that I was planning to move to the Arctic circle for a few months.
He said, “I don’t like your latitude.”
I need to move out of my parent's house
Their wifi password is " our40yrsoldbaby", i mean come on I'm 45.
Betcha $5 I can move that bottle with my mind...
"No way, dad!"
knocks bottle over with hands My mind controls my hands. Now where's my $5?!
I got a fake passport to move to Sydney
What computer code will give you the moves of a politician?
Why can't pencils and erasers move?
Because they're stationery.
Mom moves expensive cuts of beef into the top shelf.
Dad: The steaks have never been higher.
Being a wheelchair user must be wheelie hard to move on especially when someone walks out on you
Due to the state of the pandemic I decided to move to my house boat for a while
I move America last month and I'm still try to learning English
Teacher : Juan, create a sentence using the word "harmony"
Me: i tell my girlfriend that my money is harmony. We share everything together.
As much as you might move around an envelope
It'll always be stationery.
Not to brag, but I beat our local chess champion in less than 5 moves yesterday.
Finally my high school karate lessons came to some use.
Not to brag, but I defeated our local chess champion in less than 5 moves.
Finally my high school karate lessons came to some use.
Not to brag, but I beat the local chess champion in less than 5 moves yesterday.
Finally my high school karate lessons came of some use.
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