So last night my boyfriend left the bedroom door open to get more heat in the room because there are more heating vents in the hallway than in the bedroom. I said, "You might say it's eVENTful." He didn't laugh. So then I said, "You'll laugh eVENTually."
What do you call a dinosaur who is easy to clean, heat resistant and long lasting?
py-rex
I'll get my coat...
Why, when I heat some water, I am boiling it. But when my wife heats some water...
Literally took the heat off!
My wife finally bought a ventilator yesterday because of the heat..
Oven mitts make hands immune to heat.
At least to a certain degree.
(first post here. thought of this while making a hot pocket)
I have a farmer friend who heats his milk products to 212 degrees Fahrenheit using cow chips...
Yep. It's called pasture-ized milk.
During the heat of the summer, my wife asked if I wanted the fan to oscillate.
I said I like it both ways, but it is variable.
If something were heat resistant...
Would you say it's heat proof, to a certain degree?
Today I found out that roofing in the summer heat can be really dangerous.
WARNING: HOT SHINGLES ARE IN YOUR AREA.
Why do partcles get exited when we heat something up?
Because it's volume increases
What do you call someone that's always stealing your heat?
What's more effective than a heat-seeking missile?
When the heat turns down, we thieves gather in our secret hideout for a meeting.
We call it our Con Den session.
What's faster, heat or cold?
Heat. Because you can catch a cold.
My wife asked me the best way to heat up her leftovers
I told her to put some hot sauce on it.
That desert heat must have started getting to the sign makers
All we need to make heat is create a little friction, I'll give you the fric- you give me the -tion
Frick, that's what I like to hear
So, if I heat my solid state hard drive until it becomes a gaseous state hard drive
Would that mean I'm doing cloud computing?
LPT: If you can't afford to heat your bedroom there are some places in the room that are warmer then others.
The corners for example are always 90 degrees
My girlfriend told me to heat up the chilli in the fridge for dinner.
I asked if I wasn't better off heating up the chilli in the microwave. No response.
Teacher: “Which Of The Two Travels Faster, Heat Or Cold?”
Teacher: “Which Of The Two Travels Faster, Heat Or Cold?”
Student: “Heat”
Teacher: “What Makes You Think That?”
Student: “Because We Catch Cold“
If you heat up a Panzer enough, will it be a gas tank?
I found this small stick with one end coated with a material that can be ignited by frictional heat. It made me feel loved, wholesome and beautiful.
Like a match made in heaven.
Its 80 degrees outside and my co-worker is wearing a sweater in this heat
When I asked him about it he said "I'm just that cool"
It’s weird how direct sunlight heats up my car while the air outside is well below freezing.
The sun must be some kind of space heater.
I melted in the 103 degree Dallas heat just to document this pun - I hope it was worth it.....
imgur.com/lRgYEuB
This July heat really gets to me (guess the pun!)
With this recent heat wave, I can't help but feel bad for the pigs.
You know how things expand with heat.
I walked out into the heat yesterday after it rained...
and then someone jumped me and my wallet was stolen. It was a bit muggy.
Justin Bieber was in a hotel in Arizona yesterday. The air conditioning was broken, so he asked the hotel manager if he could do something about the heat.
The hotel manager replied, "sorry, I'm not a big fan."
My dorm room has no heat
My mom was worried. She told me to make sure I have plenty of blankets on my bed.
I told her I had it covered.
How does a fetus heat his apartment?
Why don't surfers heat up their food?
They don't like microwaves.
Why do you heat up shawarma before you eat it?
Otherwise, it'd be called Sha-cold-a.
I bought soup to heat up for dinner...
Wife: Can you man the soup while I make the grilled cheese?
Me yelling at the soup cans: BE A MAN!!!
What do you call something you sit on that can heat you up or cool you down?
Seating and chair conditioning!
We just a new heat pump installed in our house.
My dad was telling me all the fancy features and telling me how efficient it is compared to our old gas furnace.
Me: Well it sounds like we are going to saving a bunch of money on our heating bill! That's awesome.
Dad: yeah it's super efficient. So I'm pretty pumped!
Me: -_-
Dad: shit eating grin and a good chuckle
Me: god dammit dad
Can you turn the heat up, Dad?
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