The ancient Romans made a lot of deadly poisons. The fourth one they created, however, just made people itchy.

They called it poison IV

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
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My daughter’s creation: Who is the fourth most dangerous supervillain?

Poison IV.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GovernorZipper
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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May the fourth be with you .
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thedroidlife
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2020
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And the Lord said unto John "come fourth and receive eternal life"

But he came fifth and won a toaster.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IwantaWeasel
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
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Ha Ha this is funny joke english is fourth language
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bobtomzoe69
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
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If lazyness was an olympic sport, I would come fourth.

I woudn't want to climb up the podium

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hoggenstein123
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
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Why are there no knock knock jokes about the Fourth of July?

Because freedom rings.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gasoline-rainbows
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
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What do you call a sidewalk that zig zags back and fourth all crazy?

A.. psycho path!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/paul092834
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
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What did the widow who just buried her fourth husband say?

Another male in the coffin.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bismuth21
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
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A princess wants to choose her future husband. Her engineers create a maze full of deadly traps. After the struggle, four princes survive. The first three have both their hands cut off. The fourth one still has one hand left. Which one will she choose?

She will chose the fourth prince: he's the most hand-some.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/danielsoft1
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2020
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Pun maybe funny (sorry english is my fourth language).
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bobtomzoe69
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2019
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I've worn glasses since fourth grade.

I can't wait to finally see 2020 tomorrow.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JhopkinsWA
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
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My boss said that an outdoor concert was fine this fourth of July celebration despite the forecast f rain...

Just so I cover all the bassists.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2020
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Breaking the fourth wall.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SimpleSavio
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2019
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What do you call a duck on the Fourth of July?

A firequacker!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/glucose-fructose
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2019
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I have a friend named Henry the fourth.

We call him β€˜HIV’.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/artakhosravi
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2019
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Some people have off on July 4th. Fire does not. Fire works on the Fourth of July
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PandaYoshi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2019
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What cereal do you eat late in the fourth quarter?

Cinnamon Toast Crunch-Time

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lifelonglifter
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2019
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Happy Fourth of July!!!

But have you wondered where the other 75% is?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/davekrawczyk
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2018
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I am one before the Fourth and the Fourth is with me.

(getting a jump on everyone posting May the Fourth be with you tommorrow)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/groggyjava
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2017
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Fourth generation dad joke.

My Grandfather passed it on to my dad who I picked it up from and now my son just looks at me. It works for almost everything.

-Anyone: "geez it's cold outside"

-me: "yeah it's not very warm either"

Or

-"look how small that car is" -"it's not very big either"

"I think that guy is sleeping over there" "Yeah, he's not very awake either"

So yeah, not the best, but it's somthing I constantly do whenever I can think of the opposite.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wellheythereguys
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2014
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A classic dad joke from Blackadder Goes Fourth

Blackadder: I spy, with my bored little eye... something beginning with "T".

Baldrick: Breakfast!

Blackadder: What?

Baldrick: My breakfast always begins with tea. Then I have a little sausage. Then a egg with some little soldiers.

Blackadder: Baldrick, when I said it begins with "T," I was talking about a letter.

Baldrick: No, it never begins with a letter! The postman don't come 'til 10:30!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/slamalamafistvag
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2013
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Just found this place - my dad follows up about a fourth of his jokes with this one.

After telling a joke, he'll have a little dialogue with himself like this:

Dad: [joke] Us: Ha ha, we get it dad. Dad: Haha I'm such a wit. Or at least half that.

I say "dialogue with himself" since he'll say this to nobody in particular/after we've left/as he's walking away. And I love him for it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Snophie
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2013
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God said to John, "come fourth and you will receive eternal life",

John came fifth and won a toaster.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LeJash
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2019
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God said: come fourth John and win eternal life

John came fifth and won a toaster!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommyBoi69696969
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2019
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God told John come fourth and receive eternal life...

But John came fifth and got a toaster

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ARandomGuy678
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2018
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God said to Tom "Come fourth and receive eternal life."

Instead Tom came fifth and received a toaster

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πŸ‘€︎ u/twizzlerwhipped
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2019
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And God said unto John, "Come fourth and receive eternal life."

But John came fifth and ended up with a toaster.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fcsquire
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2017
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God said come fourth John and...

...receive eternal life. But John came fifth and won a toaster.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Flame_CK
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2017
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