A list of puns related to "Colonial"
Grace, an Aboriginal woman falls in love with a convict called Ed.
Grace's brother, Wilangorga ( commonly known as William) is known for his anger and hate for the English.
That does not stop Grace seeing Ed any time possible.
One night William is out hunting near the town and sees Ed and Grace together
Caught off guard , He tries to scare Ed away so William Shakes Spear.
.... because theyβre full of anty bodies
Authorities are looking into it.
The first week was the hardest!
I told her I think itβs worth a shot
Police are looking into it.
She prevents ant-archy!
It isnβt hard...
The bacteria say, "But we're staph!"
There was, for instance, the time he conducted a crew of new S.A.R.H. (Society for the Aesthetic Rearrangement of History -BJ) recruits β all from late twentieth-century Terra β on a training study of Carterβs World, a newly established agricultural colony attempting to support itself by the export of edible nuts. Barely into their second generation, and having yet to show a profit, the colonists were technologically backward. Nevertheless, they showed a surprising ingenuity in the use of their few advantages. It was this resourcefulness that Feghoot was demonstrating to his rookies.
βLook at the perfection with which these streets are gradedβ, exclaimed one student. βEarth-moving machinery on this scale is strictly high technology stuff. How can they do it?β
βA new alleyway is being constructed, nearbyβ, said Feghoot. βLet us walk that way while I explain.β As they strolled, he told his students that countless centuries before, the Carterβs World system had been inhabited by a now-vanished race of giants. This very planet had served them for a nursery, and among the many artifacts they had left were thousands of childrens blocks, immense and precision-cut. You simply jack one up onto logs, bring it where you want it, put collapsible jacks underneath, snake out the logs, spread soil more or less evenly beneath, and collapse the jacks.
βI seeβ, said the student. βItβs not graded road at all; its a simple hammered-earth base.β
βThatβs right,β Feghoot went on smoothly. βYou just hit the road jack and donβt come back no mo.β
His students registered dismay and anguish.
βIsnβt that right, old-timer?,β Feghoot demanded of an ancient Carterian standing by the mouth of the newly completed alley they had just reached.
βAhm afraid not, suhβ, said the senior citizen, and the students giggled at Feghoots discomfiture. βOh, we used to do it that way, but it was far too much trouble. Itβs the soil heah. You see, the very same soil which produced our famous cashews is so high in clay content that a child could roll out a road of it. Then, we simply use a system of lenses to bake it into hardness. Ahve just completed this alley mahself, and ahm just a retired professor of Sports History, much too old and feeble to handle hydraulic jacks.
βSo you see,β he finished, eyes twinkling, βMah hammered alley is really cashews clay.β
Howls of agony rose from the students, but Feghoot never hesitated. βAnd heβ, he said, turning to his students, βis clearly the gradi
... keep reading on reddit β‘He's important
I said restaurants.
βI didnβt.β
I answered negatively, "does ant matter".
I would call her clothes-minded but that would make me a dickhead.
A penal colony
At the leper colony.
I was born ready.
I'm not sure, but it definitely will be Moonotheisitic
"Clothed for Winter"
They only have one cell.
but a leper never changes its tots.
(My dad made this up when we visited Spinalonga in about 1998...its one of his all time classics. I only remember the punchline so I made up the first bit and its not historically true.)
"The first day is meant to be the hardest, you stick out like a sore thumb"
Their slogan: "Don't thread on me"
That was classic Colognialism
He calls them his watch dogs
"Nude Colony Ahead, Keep Your Eyes on the Road!"
He said "Oh, Cool Ranch?"
Me: Umm...this is clearly a Colonial
Why did the scarecrow win a prize? Because he stood alone in his field! He stood there for years, rotting, until he was forgotten.
I tell my kids, youβre allowed to watch the TV all you wantβ¦ Just donβt turn it on! This way they will begin to understand the futility of all things.
How does a penguin build a house? Igloos it together. Like all animals, it is an automaton, driven by blind genetic imperative, marching slowly to oblivion.
Why donβt skeletons go trick or treating? They have no body to go with them! The skeletons are like us: alone, empty, dead already.
I donβt really like playing soccer. I just do it for kicks! Like all of humanity, I pretend to enjoy things, and others pretend to care about my charade.
You hear about the moon restaurant? Good food, no atmosphere! If you eat there, you forfeit your life, which would make no difference to the universe as a whole.
Why did the blonde focus on an orange juice container? It said concentrate! She realized that societyβs depictions of her were like the juice: formulaic, insipid, fake.
My wife told me to put the cat out. I didnβt know it was on fire! By the time I could act, it was incinerated, a harbinger of the path we all must take.
How come the invisible man wasnβt offered a job? They just couldnβt see him doing it! This man stands for all of us: unseen, misunderstood, irrelevant.
Today I gave away my old batteriesβ¦ Free of charge! No one wanted them, so I became angry and threw them in the yard. The battery acid now leaks into the soil, killing a colony of ants. A sparrow eats their bodies and is poisoned. Somewhere in the Serengeti, a lion devours his rivalβs cubs. Then the lion is shot by a poacher and sold to an unloved rich man whose father was an unloved rich man. In five billion years, the Sun will become a bloated giant, boiling the oceans and consuming our pointless cruelties with flames. I wake sweat-drenched and screaming, staring at the visage of a faceless god. βWHAT HAVE I DONE?! HOW COULD I BRING A CHILD INTO THIS WORLD!?β But this god, like all gods, is nothingβjust my sonβs Wilson baseball mitt, sitting on my dresser, mocking me.
Will February March? No, but April May! Soon we become ash, and time forgets us.
Source: https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/nihilist-dad-jokes
Hard labor in the renal colony.
The new rover Curiosity discovered life on Mars tonight. A small group of creatures resembling cats was discovered unfortunately, the rover came down directly on top of the colony killing them. Even millions of miles away, Curiosity kills the cats.
Authorities are looking into it
Itβs not hard.
The first few days were the hardest...
The first few days were the hardest.
The first few days were the hardest.
It's not very hard.
The police are looking into it
Police are looking into it.
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