A bunch of books fell on me yesterday, but I couldn’t find anyone at fault in the accident.
I only have my shelf to blame.
I accidentally swallowed a bunch of Scrabble tiles.
My next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster.
Did you hear about Roger Daltrey and Pete Townshend breaking into an animal shelter and releasing a bunch of huskies into the wild??
Turns out it was The Who that let the dogs out
I just killed a bunch of chickpeas...
A bunch of guys decided to build a cocktail lounge on top of Pike’s Peak.
It didn’t do as well as hoped. Maybe they set the bar too high.
I saved a bunch of money on my car insurance
When I fled the scene of the accident.
Space X is planning to send a bunch of cattle into orbit.
It will be the herd shot 'round the world.
I got a bunch of crows together and tried to teach them how to sing
But it just resulted in a cacawphony
I have a bunch of dead batteries if anyone is interested...
What do you call a bunch of racist red necks storming the Capitol Building?
If you wanted to take a bunch of bullets and forge them into a sword fit for a king what Caliber would you use?
I have a bunch of unemployment jokes
My dog swallowed a bunch of scrabble pieces
When he goes to the bathroom it could spell trouble.
I have a bunch of lazy people jokes
They never work out anyways
What do you call a bunch of chess nerds bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.
If I put a bunch of iron in a line
I just printed out a bunch of pamphlets on how to avoid saying the wrong things and getting into a fight.
The other day I was attacked by a bunch of children...
but it's okay since I only took minor damage.
What do you call a bunch of people in a car driving through a big tube?
An old mine shaft collapsed on a bunch of workers the other day.
But it’s okay, they only suffered miner injuries.
Saw a bunch of guys in the local department store, shouting “f#ck”, “b#ll&cks”, “w#nker”!
Then realised I was in the menswear section.
My coworker was trying to reorganize his filling cabinet and got stuck when he discovered a bunch of documents about Italian dictators.
I told him to file them as Mussollaneous.
For the past few days, I wake up to see someone has dumped a bunch of LEGO blocks on my front porch.
I don’t know what to make of it.
I thought about asking my girlfriend why she wears a bunch of wristwatches on her belt...
But I decided it was a waist of time.
A group of bedazzled tarps and a bunch of poles walk into a restaurant and order some stakes....
Things became pretty tents.
Top places to get a bunch of doves
- Bird store
- Magicians warehouse
What happens when you put a bunch of lads together?
A bunch of male ducks teased me today because I still watch Nickelodeon.
I ignored them because I don't have time for Drakes and Josh
Did you hear that the Air Force just bought a bunch of copies of The Little Mermaid on DVD?
They must be preparing for an Ariel assault.
My friend put a bunch of laxatives into my food without me knowing.
With friends like that, who needs enemas?
I just saw my wife tripping and dropping a bunch of clothes she just ironed.
A bunch of robbers came in and stole all of my soap.
Dirty bastards.
Then the cops came over and did a full report.
They said they got away clean.
I met a creepy guy who forced me to take home a bunch of horses with swords in their mouths.
My brother and I are on a tight deadline to make a bunch of Dracula action figures.
I have to make every second Count.
What's it called when a bunch of obese people have a drag race?
I saw a bunch of crooks kidnap a blind man.
Safe to say he did not see that coming.
What do you call a bunch of girls addicted to cocaine?
A bunch of people said they liked my shirt
Yesterday I was confronted by a bunch of angry prostitutes.
It was a hoes-tile situation.
I’ve accidentally swallowed a bunch of Scrabble tiles.
My next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster.
I just ate a bunch of Scrabble tiles.
My next trip to the bathroom might spell disaster.
I had a bunch of books fall on me
I only have my shelf to blame.
I accidentally swallowed a bunch of Scrabble tiles.
My next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster.
I accidentally swallowed a bunch of Scrabble tiles…
…my next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster.
I just printed a bunch of pamphlets on how to avoid conflicts and not say the wrong thing.
Every morning after I wake up, I find that someone has dumped a bunch of LEGO on my front porch.
I don’t know what to make of it.
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