A lot of the jokes on this sub are just terrible, but at the end of the day...
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︎ Apr 20 2021
A lot of people canβt tell the difference between entomology and etymology.
I canβt find the words for how much this bugs me.
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︎ Apr 26 2021
So you know Gandhi? Walked barefoot, tough feet. Fasted a lot, so he was weak. Prayed a lot, real spiritual. Unfortunately, suffered from bad breath.
In other words, he was a super-calloused fragile mystic suffering from halitosis.
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︎ Apr 22 2021
It means a lot
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︎ Apr 12 2021
Not to brag, but I experimented a lot with drugs and sex when I was in college.
Unfortunately I was part of the control group.
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︎ Mar 09 2021
I like jokes with a lot of soul in them.
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︎ Mar 23 2021
Been coughing up black feathers a lot recently.
The doctors think I might have Corvid.
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︎ Apr 27 2021
What reptile uses the phone a lot?
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︎ Apr 11 2021
Whatβs big, grey, and asks a lot of questions?
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︎ Apr 09 2021
I have a pencil that used to belong to William Shakespeare. He chewed it a lot.
Now, I can't tell if it's 2B or not 2B!
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︎ Dec 10 2020
This post might be a little ballsy. And if it gets a lot of attention, I might get cocky.
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︎ Mar 04 2021
I've been building a lot of LEGO sets with my kids lately.
I'm happy to say I've been having an AFOL time!
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︎ Apr 17 2021
My son grows a lot of fur and manufactures products of art or craft on nights when the moon is full...
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︎ Apr 28 2021
People give me a lot of trouble for being a necromancer
Can't a guy just raise a family in peace?
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︎ Apr 06 2021
I recently joined a support group for people who talk a lot.
We call ourselves On and On Anon.
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︎ Mar 09 2021
There's been a lot of people who aren't Dad's making Dad jokes on here recently. If you're not a Dad you shouldn't be making Dad Jokes.
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︎ Nov 05 2020
I have a lot of unemployment jokes
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︎ Apr 15 2021
A lot of people think that crop circles are caused by alien aircrafts.
But, I think they are done by cereal killers.
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︎ Apr 19 2021
Why do police talk to bankers a lot?
Because they are "persons of interest."
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︎ Apr 24 2021
Jay Leno went to Morgan Freemanβs house and had a lot of drinks. Leno suddenly started to urinate on Freemanβs carpet. Freeman was furious and ran after him as he kept on urinating. The banker next door saw the whole thing and decided to start a bank...
Kids, that is the true story of how Jay-pee-Morgan-chase was named
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︎ Apr 30 2021
What do you call a fish that knows a lot of organized information?
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︎ Apr 04 2021
I learned a lot about belly buttons in college...
I went to the Navel Academy
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︎ Apr 11 2021
You can learn a lot of things when making a rose garden
I learnt that I donβt feel like making a rose garden any time soon.
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︎ Apr 20 2021
What's a PokΓ©mon that sneezes a lot?
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︎ Apr 05 2021
Someone dug a plethora of dβearth. Now Iβve got a hole lot of nothing.
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︎ Mar 19 2021
Lots of people know about Harley Quinn but very few people have heard about her twin brother who was stillborn...
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︎ Mar 23 2021
My wife uses nasal spray a lot, to the point we think she is addicted to it. I tried to send her to rehab, but she didn't like it.
She said it was just a bunch of stuffy people.
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︎ Mar 21 2021
If you change word "Love" to "Lunch", you can totally change the meaning of a lot of songs.
All You Need Is Lunch
Do You Believe In Life After Lunch
Lunch In An Elevator
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︎ Jan 23 2021
During my dental appointment, I found out that I had a lot of cavities
Turned out to be my dental dis-appointment
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︎ Mar 30 2021
I have a lot of patience
Cause I never use any of it
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︎ Feb 26 2021
What do you call a truck driver who knows a lot about the truck but can't read or write fluently?
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︎ Apr 05 2021
I've noticed that a lot of math teachers don't want to be mean...
They strive to be above average.
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︎ Mar 24 2021
My dad has been going through a lot of hard ships latelyβ¦
He dismantles them for a living.
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︎ Mar 24 2021
How do you call something that makes a lot of sense for people who know how to count if you dont?
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︎ Mar 10 2021
I found out the other day that the flying spaghetti monster has a lot of anxiety.
I guess he suffers from impasta syndrome
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︎ Mar 28 2021
A bread demon would bring a lot of pain.
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︎ Feb 15 2021
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "You are in here a lot, do you think you have a drinking problem?"
The horse says, "I don't think so," then disappears into nothing.
This is the point in time when all the philosophy students in the audience begin to giggle, as they are familiar with the philosophical proposition of Cogito ergo sum, or I think, therefore, I am. The classic philosophy put forward by RenΓ© Descartes.
But to explain the concept aforehand would be putting Descartes before the horse.
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︎ Sep 05 2020
My Wife got a thin crust pizza for dinner. It reminded me a lot of myself:
No dough and lots of cheese.
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︎ Mar 01 2021
There's a lot of different ways to depict Jesus, but I always think of him up on the cross
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︎ Mar 08 2021
Ever since my girlfriend got pregnant, a lot in my life has changed....
Like, my name, phone number, and address
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︎ Mar 17 2021
Youβll do a lot of dumb things in your youth, son, and thatβs okay, because most of the consequences wonβt follow you into adulthood. But you know what will always come back to haunt you?
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︎ Mar 15 2021
What is the best month to drink a lot of beer?
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︎ Feb 01 2021
With the A380, Airbus really had a lotβ¦
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︎ Mar 22 2021
Sex is a lot like maths...
You add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and pray you don't multiply.
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︎ Feb 03 2021
I used to like lemons a lot.
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︎ Mar 10 2021
If they launched a lot of cattle into orbit.
If they launched a lot of cattle into orbit.
It would be the herd shot βround the world.
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︎ Jan 27 2021
A lot of people think that crop circles are done by alien aircrafts.
But I think they are done by cereal killers.
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︎ Apr 21 2021
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