I invented the cure for Covid, it's made of my own breed of coffee.

I call it the Mcafee antivirus

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Aglaz
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
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I went to a zoo once and all it had were dogs, I saw this breed I didn’t recognize.

Then I realized, it was a shit zoo

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2020
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What do you get when you breed an elephant with a rhinoceros?

El if I know!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rule62Club
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
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Hairdressers are the most corrupt breed...

They're always making shortcuts

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Persons1001
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2020
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Why dont eagles and eels breed?

Because its eeleagle.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlobbyChong
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2020
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Did you know you can change the breed of your poodle by teaching it to giggle on command?

It will change the breed of your dog into a snicker-doodle.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Youtuatoot
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
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What breed is the dog of a magician?

A labracadabrador

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RickWithCK
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
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Why don’t owls breed in the rain?

Because it’s too wet to woo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2020
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Apparently, there's a big market for an expensive breed of cow that only eats marijuana plants.

The steaks are high.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JuicyPotato21
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2020
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What are scientists favorite dog breed?

Labs

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πŸ‘€︎ u/youcomebeforeyou
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2020
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what do you call a dog breed, bred to hear really well?

what do you call a dog breed bred to hear really well?

corn bread

*this was a pun i made a while ago to see how many puns i could fit in a short joke.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDragonInNight
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2020
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My uncle's wife started a pet store that specialized in one breed of dog only...

She closed due to terrier-able sales.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2020
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Elaborate, what's your favorite dog breed ?

Elaborador

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nadimazar
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2020
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Me and some other guys like to get together at the local supermarket to show off our rare breed black-feathered chickens. New guy today mustn't have understood because...

There was an unexpected white hen in the bragging area

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mittenshape
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2020
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Be careful if you decide to breed rabbits

I've heard that it's a real hare raising experience

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cheerfulsith
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2019
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What breed of dog can jump higher than buildings?

Any dog. Buildings can’t jump.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/labink
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2020
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So apparently there's now a mutated virus specifically targeting people who have worthless, aggressive, mixed breed dogs.

The cur owner virus.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AarGee1
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2020
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TV Narrator* This is a mallard. A mallard is a dabbling duck that breeds throughout the world. This one is in search of a mate. A female will lay 8 to 13 eggs.

Duckumentary

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Odd-looking
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2020
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Why don’t you breed an eel with an eagle?

It’s Eeleagle

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Swoholo
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2019
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What is Edgar Allen Poe's favorite breed of dog?

A melancholy

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2020
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What's the saddest breed of dog?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/logan_btw
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2019
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What do get when a bulldog and a shitzu Breed?

Bullshit!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lockdoggs15
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2019
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What Breed of Dog is Always Sad?

A Mellon Collie

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IceCold_Kelvin
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2019
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My uncle used to breed and sell parakeets...

they were flying off the shelves but he switched to chickens and they didn't take off. So he tried ducks and then it was all bills, bills, bills.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lineman5
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2018
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What’s Waluigi’s favorite dog breed

A chiWAHWAH

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πŸ‘€︎ u/potato_potterhead
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2019
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New dog breeds!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/acadiel
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2018
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What breed of dog does a ghost have?

A Yorkshee Terroror.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/objectional
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2019
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Dachshund's are a cowboy's favorite dog breed.

They're always telling everyone to get a long little doggie!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/breakone9r
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2019
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Did you know there is a breed of dog that loves science?

You can tell which one it is because they're always wearing a lab coat.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScotchHarbour
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2019
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I believe it's wrong for humans to selectively breed dogs until their faces are smashed flat and they can't breathe normally.

Hugs not pugs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wrethlig
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2018
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In 2017, the top breed of dog on Google was the Golden Retriever.

Second and third place went to the silver and bronze retrievers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/randomion
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2018
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What do you call a place that breeds green cows?

Moscow

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NickWilde992
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2018
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What do you get when you breed a rhino with an elephant?

Elephino.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cado111
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2018
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What do you get if you cross-breed an elephant with a kangaroo?

A dead kangaroo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/alaginge
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2017
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Why can’t you breed an eel with an eagle?

It’s Eeleagle.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Quint_Cordewener
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
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Why can't you breed an eel with an eagle?

Because it's eeleagle.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kirbykooll
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
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Why can't you breed an eel with an eagle?

It's eeleagle...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Im_the_black_hole
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2019
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I used to breed rabbits but it got out of control.

It was a hare raising experience.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dadjokesig
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2018
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I used to breed rabbits

It was a hare raising experience.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dan_the_Man0904
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2018
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How do you call a breed between a bulldog and shitzu

bullshit

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jeffrey15092001
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2018
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