They have Cicadian rythm...
My body thinks my mind is an idiot.
Every time this queer couple lied to their son, he would see right through them.
>they were trans-parent.
Those are the years youβre in your prime
I said, "Every year"
It says it's M 18+
It was a minor minority minor miner notoriety.
http://imgur.com/48pSnFZ
I'm in my prime.
So I guess the difference is a matter of a pinion.
They CAN'T EVEN right now!
B: "Hey dad, how many animals can jump higher than a building?"
Me: "I Don't know."
B: "All of them, buildings can't jump."
Me: ΰ² _ΰ²
Not quite as tragic, but it manifested into something which has haunted me at my job for years.
When I was a little kid learning about the world around me, my dad was naturally the font of all knowledge for me, He would answer all of little snippersmith's questions with his own unique insights and anecdotes teaching me of my surroundings with varying degrees of accuracy.
One day In a picture book, I encountered a photo of one of natures most bizarre creatures, the mighty duck billed platypus. Filled with curiosity of this bizarre creature and an Inability to read a young snippersmith asked his father what this creature was called, To which his father replied,
That's a Quackopotamous.....
As is a highly likely situation in day to day life the Platypus (or indeed the Quackopotamous), did not come into conversation for another 17 years, Until of course the Platypus came into conversation around the lunch table at a now grown up snippersmith's full time place of work.
I have not been allowed to forget I thought the Platypus was called a Quackopotamous, Indeed I am reminded on a daily basis by my colleagues, by my nickname Quackopotamous .
Thanks Dad.
EDIT 1: Holy Cow this took off! Gold! thank you so much.
They literally can't even
I tell her "leave her alone, she's trying to stay on top of her education."
Wife still won't admit it was funny. :(
*edit for grammar.
The big ones at the end of the wing. These feathers are called pinion feathers. A crow has sixteen.
So, the difference between a crow and a raven is only a matter of a pinion.
Of course theyβre all newborns.
Really big hands.
Me- Sure, but why so many people? Dad- The DVD says it is only for 18+ viewers.
Went to get tickets from the office, waited in line for a while but got sorted.
Had to rent a limo, another line in their office but got one pretty quick.
Remembered I needed flowers, ran to the local florist, this time there was a massive line but they looked after me.
Eventually we got to Prom. Future Wife asks me to get her some punch.
I go to the refreshments table
Theres no punchline.
This might seem odd but I can't even
Tonight, I'm gonna potty like it's 1999.
Thatβs Horatio of about 3 to 1.
Constantine
What do you call a baptized bale of hay?
Christian Bale
I guess you could call it a...
Flying FORDTRESS
...is Horatio
Mom: Well how are you feeling being 17 now?
Dad: I bet he's feeling a little odd.
Collective groan
Dad: But at least he's in his prime!
In regards to how to pursue a girl, a friend said, "I just don't know what angle to take." To which I replied: "A 90 degree. It's always right"
Me: Bye, Dad! I'm going to get a haircut." Dad: "Which one?"
Due to the millennium bug all 3d modelling software has been rendered useless.
My friend was helping me on a piece of music I was having trouble with. Him: "You're rushin'. " (rushin'=rushing=playing the music faster than the tempo) Me: "No, I'm Italian"
There were only two other people in the room. One of them looked at me like I had murdered their dog, and the other was on the floor for a solid two minutes.
When he returned home this morning I looked at the car and yelled "did you leave the car out in the rain last night?"
His look of terror faded into disbelief that he fell for it.
My friend: You hear Jack got to 2nd base for the first time yesterday
Me: He must not be that good at baseball
My friend told me that my jokes were worse than his dad :(
I bought some wooden birds that one of the IT guys from Africa sells and I walk into my area to change into my work clothes.
My supervisor says to me, "You got a bird in your hand."
I say, "Yeah! It was worth 2 in a bush! ( Ν‘Β° ΝΚ Ν‘Β°)"
Supervisor: ΰ² _ΰ²
I was driving with my parents and see a hearse in an auto shop and I was like, "That hearse's engine probably died!" then comes the groaning
He lives in a somewhat rural town and someone he knows rode his horse through town today. As he pulled up next to him he asked " How many miles to the gallon does your MUSTANG get?"
So proud right now.
TV: "She is one of only a handful of people who can read the ancient script Cuneiform."
Brother: "They must be tiny."
In Seattle, Two guys are fighting, when one of them says
guy1: "I'll punch you so hard you'll fly and drop in Portland"
guy2: "I'll punch you so hard you'll fly off and drop in Vegas"
And third guy walking past overhears this and asks,
"Which ones of you can give me half a punch, I need to get to LA"
Talking about ordering drinks in a pitcher vs cups. Me: And that's why I'll never order pitchers. I prefer cups. Him: Really? I prefer batters. At least they can score.
These are the big ones at the end of the wing, also called pinion feathers. A crow only has 16 of them. So the difference between a crow and a raven is only a matter of a pinion.
