Where is a breast after it gets warmed up?
Global Warming pun spotted on r/memes
When I moved into my new igloo my friends threw me a surprise house-warming party.
What is the best house warming present?
My son asked me, "Daddy, why do bees stay in the hive in the winter?" I smiled and answered...
How warm is a janitors closet?
What do astronauts use to stay warm?
My wife keeps insisting that I should warm up before I start exercising.
Sounds like a stretch to me.
I've started a new band called "Blanket'
With the global warming raising the sea level, it is only a question of time for England to become Engsea.
Build a man a fire and he’s warm for a day...
...set him on fire and he’s warm the rest of his life.
I heard it was warm and cozy inside.
A german tourist jumped in the freezing water to save my dog. After he climbed out, he said, “here is ze dog, dry him off and keep him warm, he vill be fine. I asked him, “are you a vet?”
He said, “vet? I’m fucking soaking”
Whenever I can't work because of lack of connectivity, I get a warm fuzzy feeling
Global Warming?
What a load of rubbish...
Credits: u/expectdaworst
How else would they stay warm all winter?
Yup I quit cold turkey last month.
Warmed in the microwave is so much better.
Justice is a dish best served cold, if it were served warm jt would be justwater.
Did you know global warming is reducing terrorism?
2020 came out looking like a warm chocolate chip cookie...
My wife had a hard day at work, so I drew her a warm bath...
She didn't really seem to appreciate the sketch but it went on the fridge anyway...
Edit: I thunk up a better punchline.
Do you know who shouldn’t have house warming parties?
Eskimos.
If they have a house warming party their house will melt.
my friend moved into an igloo
everything was going well until the housewarming party
[from my 4yo boy] How do you keep warm in a cold room?
Go to the corner there always around 90°
Today i drank a warm monster or should i say
I have always preffered winter more than summer
Because in winter you can keep adding more layers until you are warm but in summer you can only take off so many before you are arrested
Why isn’t the Pacific Ocean warm?
Because it’s bordering on Chile..
What did the fish say when he rammed into the warm wall?
Our landlord knocked on our door today and said that if we didn't pay rent, they'd turn off the heater tomorrow
The key to staying warm is lots of layers
I'm applying coats of varnish to the table I'm making
My brother: Jeez, How many coats do you need? I'm sure the table is warm enough already!
Global warming will kill every single person on this planet,
It's a good thing I'm married...
My friend keeps insisting that I should always warm up before I start exercising.
I think that’s a stretch.
A man is out ice fishing, but not having any luck. But he sees a guy across the lake pulling out fish after fish.
So the man goes over and says “I’ve been watching you catch so many fish today, but I’m getting nothing. What’s your secret?”
The other man says “Mffffmmm mmmm mfffmmmm mmmmm”
The first man says “What?”
The other man spits something into his hand and says “I said, you gotta keep your worms warm!”
With the nice warm weather last weekend, a neighbor was enthusiastically diggin' in the dirt planting his garden!
He was so excited about it, he wet his plants.
Why did the wizard have a pie with a hole in it?
You know what they say about hindsight!
My friends threw a house warming party in my new igloo.
If you build a man a fire he will be warm for a day.
If you set a man on fire he will be warm for the rest of his life.
Justice is a dish best served cold
If it were served warm it would be justwater.
Justice is a dish best served cold
Because if it were served warm it would be justwater
Justice is a dish best served cold, if it were served warm it would be justwater
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