Do not wear headphones while vacuuming.

I just now vacuumed the whole house to discover the vacuum was not plugged in.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NikonDexter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I really hate vacuuming the stairs but I'm taking it one step at a time
πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lan_chop
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Having someone join a voice chat while their parents are vacuuming really sucks.
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TLop_123
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Vacuuming friend

During some home renovation my friend was using a vacuum and after he shut it off, he turned to me and said with a concerned voice "this thing sucks" and slowly cracked a smile.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dfunkhizzle
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2013
🚨︎ report
I decided to sell my vacuum...

It was only collecting dust.

πŸ‘︎ 6k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kameemo
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Let me tell you a joke about a vacuum

Never mind. It sucks.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thecataclysmo
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2021
🚨︎ report
After a few uses, I decided to get rid of my vacuum.

It sucks.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
what vacuum cleaner has no male heirs

dyson

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/twitchard
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2021
🚨︎ report
I gave my ex wife my old vacuum

Jokes on her the thing really sucked

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/handsoffmynuts08
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
I had to sell my vacuum cleaner

It was just gathering dust

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/vamplestat666
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I sold my vacuum cleaner today..

All it was doing was collecting dust

πŸ‘︎ 104
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Snugl-v203
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
My father told me about an astronaut who suffocated because he left a vacuum upside down in an airlock

Father: What a horrible way to Dyson

Joke sucked, I know

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GeneraLi525
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
🚨︎ report
My dad attacked me with the vacuum yesterday

He was running around the house yelling "Dyson!"

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lil_suge
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I sold my old vacuum cleaner...

... it sucked. All it did was gather dust.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FirstHomosapien
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Kinda sucks
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ha-Ka-Tu
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2021
🚨︎ report
If you clean a vacuum cleaner...

...you make the vacuum cleaner.

If you make a living out of it, you'd be called the vacuum cleaner.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NecroUknown
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I got a vacuum cleaner from Wish.com

It sucks

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rckidyt
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Just bought a vacuum cleaner, from a Buddhist selling them door to door. I should have known better..

..it came with no attachments.

πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
🚨︎ report
What sound does a vacuum sweeper make when it explodes?

KA-BROOM!!!

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/justcallmebean
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Vacuum go brrrr.
πŸ‘︎ 477
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Ordered a vacuum a few days back. Good quality, though the product was a little sucky.

https://preview.redd.it/05c4ayjw55m51.png?width=288&format=png&auto=webp&s=40eb4d62a8ab9c00eac11c75f34ac611a41c910d

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the guy who got rid of his vacuum cleaner?

It was just gathering dust.

Sorry. Won't do another vacuum joke. They suck.

πŸ‘︎ 119
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/yorkshirenation
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I prefer to use the vacuum cleaner with boxing gloves on

They call me Dyson Fury

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Barderz
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Q: Why don't Buddhists vacuum in the corners?

A: Because they have no attachments.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/winkelschleifer
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife complained that I don't do enough housework, so she forced me to vacuum

It really sucks

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Dyson Vacuum
πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TrubbishRubish
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Vacuums suck
πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ASHER999999
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife claims that vacuum cleaners are always better for cleaning than a brush.

I said, β€œThat’s a sweeping generalization.”

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I snuck up behind my daughter and whispered, "I think our microwave and our TV are spying on us!!! And I also think our vacuum cleaner..."

"...has been gathering dirt on us for years!"

πŸ‘︎ 98
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2020
🚨︎ report
What was the vacuum’s first name?

Erin

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/__Almazan__
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
🚨︎ report
How's that new vacuum working?

It sucks.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MassGootz
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2020
🚨︎ report
What kind of vacuum did Abraham own?

Dyson

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zigbigidorlu
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
🚨︎ report
My roomba went out my front door and a pack of bears attacked it, an eagle carried it away to the ocean, and a shark finished it off.

Nature abhors a vacuum.

πŸ‘︎ 45
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dingogordy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2021
🚨︎ report
What did the murderous vacuum say to his son?

Dyson.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ChaseCeer
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
🚨︎ report
My gun and vacuum store doesn’t get really good reviews.

It seems to Suck and Blow.

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/robindc_93
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2020
🚨︎ report
I hate vacuum cleaners...

They suck.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Di_Ma_Re_Bra
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Freedom cannot exist in a vacuum.

It must suck for you!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/whatizitman
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I decided to sell my vacuum...

It was nothing.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kliuch
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
🚨︎ report
My dad attacked me with a vacuum cleaner today, yelling.....

Dyson, Dyson.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I had to sell my vacuum cleaner...

It was only gathering dust.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I’ve decided to sell my vacuum cleaner this week...

It’s just collecting dust.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/audiomandan
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
me: *cleans vacuum cleaner*

I’m a vacuum cleaner

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SmeltingFire
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
🚨︎ report
i recently sold my vacuum cleaner

all it was doing was gathering dust

πŸ‘︎ 44
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jayraj77
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
I got a new vacuum cleaner today...

It sucks

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bogan_gopnik
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner

It was just collecting dust

πŸ‘︎ 201
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/chicomagnifico
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2020
🚨︎ report

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