One of my friends was really in to fencing until his weapon broke
Apparently now it’s dull and pointless
My British friend was really proud of his heritage until he found out that his great grandfather was from Transylvania.
Now he can even look at himself in the mirror.
Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth.
Then it becomes a soap opera.
I never knew what happiness was until I got married....
...and then, it was too late.
Found out that my nanna used to compete in banana eating competitions until she was caught cheating...
... Then they had to ban nanna
I used to be the soccer team's striker until my coach realized I wasn't playing well. He said....
You should play defense, no offense.
I'm testing how long until my gum runs out of flavor,
We always thought my sisters dog Belle was an idiot, until we realized
Shes won the "No-Belle" prize
I was thinking of joining the space force until I heard about the ridiculous physical requirements!
Turns out I'm a little short for a stormtrooper.
My kids came out of school and told my partner they have made cards for her for Mother's Day. I asked for a card, but they said I had to wait until Father's Day. I told my boy I had made a card for him, and he could have it the day after tomorrow,
Never criticize someone until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes.
That way you are a mile away and you have their shoes.
This gun club wouldn't let me in until I could ejaculate bullets.
I was skeptical at first, but eventually I came a round
I was peacefully eating my Chinese soup, until a guy came out of nowhere and flipped the bowl, spilling my soup everywhere and ruining my meal.
This was an act of wonton destruction.
I enjoyed hiking up mountains, until I arrived at the top.
From there, it's all downhill.
Catholic priests were forbidden from learning math until the 20th century
Before that it was a cardinal Sin
Used to never be able to use the wifi at my farm until I moved my router to the barn.
Now I have a stable connection.
362 days until Christmas and people already have their lights up...
Not long until you get RAM’d
Wife: I’m exhausted. I was up until 4 AM with the baby.
Me: It’s probably not a good idea to keep a baby up that late.
How do you keep water in a hole in the ground until you need it?
What is president elect Joseph Robinette Biden going to do until January 20th?
Don’t knock it until you diet
A man is incomplete until he’s married.
Apparently until the age of 10 ,
Sean Connery's son thought Humpty Dumpty, shat on the wall
Everything was fine until I got a universal remote
There was an old man who lived by a forest. As he grew older and older, he started losing his hair, until one day, on his deathbed, he was completely bald. That day, he called his children to a meeting...
He said, "Look at my hair. It used to be so magnificent, but it's completely gone now. My hair can't be saved. But look outside at the forest. It's such a lovely forest with so many trees, but sooner or later they'll all be cut down and this forest will look as bald as my hair."
"What I want you to do..." the man continued. "Is, every time a tree is cut down or dies, plant a new one in my memory. Tell your descendants to do the same. It shall be our family's duty to keep this forest strong."
So they did.
Each time the forest lost a tree, the children replanted one, and so did their children, and their children after them.
And for centuries, the forest remained as lush and pretty as it once was, all because of one man and his re-seeding heirline.
I pestered my wife all evening with nonstop corny wordplay jokes until I got “the look”...
I may have encountered some punintended consequences.
I struggle with Roman Numerals until I get to 159.
This guy just approached me and won’t leave me alone until I solve a trigonometry problem.
I don’t know what his angle is.
Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
A Catholic priest will always be a Catholic until he goes on a pilgrimage....
...then He becomes a Roamin' Catholic
With on 75 days until Biden takes oath...
We'll have a lame Donald Duck period.
My job interview for the Navy was going well, until they asked if I could swim
To be honest, I thought they’d have boats.
"Egg-plant" shirt by me. Never got why the vegetable was called that until I found out that they used to be white and look like goose eggs back in the day
I can’t wait until hindsight....
These days everyone seems to be going for progressiveness until it comes to something they really care about.
& hence I don't care 'bout anything.
So I walked into my daughter's room with a tape measure the other day, and she was lying on her bed reading a book. I stood in the doorway and started slowly extending the tape measure, all the way across the room, until it touched her cheek. "What??" she asked me. My response...
"I'm measuring your patience!"
I was lonely until I glued a coffee cup to the roof of my car
Just wait until you aunt marries Robert,
Wait until he hears about the doors.
During my first month on the road paving crew, they always gave me all the worst jobs. I endured all of it, up until they put me on paint duty...
...that's where I finally had to draw the line.
My British friend was really proud of his heritage until he found out that his great grandfather was from Transylvania.
Now he can’t even look at himself in the mirror.
Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth
Then it becomes a soap opera
My British friend was really proud of his heritage until he found out that his great grandfather was from Transylvania.
Now he can’t even look at himself in the mirror.
My friend was really proud of his British heritage until he found out that his great grandfather was from Transylvania.
Now he can’t even look at himself in the mirror.
My friend was really proud of his British heritage until he found out that his great grandfather was from Transylvania.
Now he can’t even look at himself in the mirror.
Some guy just approached me and refused to leave until I solve a trigonometry problem.
I have no idea what his angle is.
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