Which melon is unable to secretly marry?
Can't Elope
Told my daughter I was unable to make reservations at the library..
They were completely booked
She won’t talk to me
Be sure to use Pure L if you are unable to wash your hands!
Why was the double barreled shotgun unable to speak when it was upset?
It was two triggered.
A pirate was unable to recite the alphabet in full
He sadly died at c
Did you hear? Parents everywhere are feeling disoriented and unable to keep up with their kids while at home.
An announcement was made by the Center for Dizzies Control.
My wife told me im unable to describe my feelings
Can’t say that I‘m surprised
What do you call a philosopher who is unable to do anything?
Kant
I am unable to support the "fat-acceptance" movement
Because they're too heavy
Why are overeaters often unable to spare you much time?
They usually have a lot on their plate.
Someone stole my cutlery set, but we were unable to identify the thief
It was stainless steel
Why was Christopher Nolan unable to share his movies?
Because he had NO-LAN!
Will feels trapped inside his operating system, unable to make non-deterministic decisions.
Will free will free Will?
Why was Iron Man unable to get out of his suit?
Tony Stuck
You are on a horse galloping at a constant speed. On your right side, is a sharp drop off and on your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you. Directly in front of you is another galloping horse, but your horse is unable to overtake it.
Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the horse in front of you.
What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?
Get off the merry-go-round!
What do you call a man who can't do anything properly and is unable to have children?
Incompotent.
Why was Beethoven unable to see his teacher?
Cos he was Haydn.
If you fib twice in a row, you'll be unable to move.
That's a pair-o-lies.
What do you call a melon that is unable to run off and get married?
A cantaloupe.
If you are unable to see the morning star...
Does that make you a Venetian blind?
The zen Buddhist achieved enlightenment, only to find himself unable to vacuum in corners.
He had no attachments.
A factory worker got his arm caught in some machinery, severing it just below the wrist. Unable to work, and with no income, he knew he had to see a prosthetic specialist as soon as possible.
What do you call a bird which rises from the ashes but is unable to fly?
Joaquin Phoenix
