Me: “I can’t say I’m surprised.”
Being of Native American descent I lack the ability to grow a full beard. My wife finds this a great source of comedic inspiration and dropped this gem.
Wife: You know why Prerblo can't grow a beard.
Friend: I don't know. Why?
Wife: Because it's all apache.
Not quite as tragic, but it manifested into something which has haunted me at my job for years.
When I was a little kid learning about the world around me, my dad was naturally the font of all knowledge for me, He would answer all of little snippersmith's questions with his own unique insights and anecdotes teaching me of my surroundings with varying degrees of accuracy.
One day In a picture book, I encountered a photo of one of natures most bizarre creatures, the mighty duck billed platypus. Filled with curiosity of this bizarre creature and an Inability to read a young snippersmith asked his father what this creature was called, To which his father replied,
That's a Quackopotamous.....
As is a highly likely situation in day to day life the Platypus (or indeed the Quackopotamous), did not come into conversation for another 17 years, Until of course the Platypus came into conversation around the lunch table at a now grown up snippersmith's full time place of work.
I have not been allowed to forget I thought the Platypus was called a Quackopotamous, Indeed I am reminded on a daily basis by my colleagues, by my nickname Quackopotamous .
Thanks Dad.
EDIT 1: Holy Cow this took off! Gold! thank you so much.
One of her friends was giving her a mini-lecture about her inability to tell people no, and then gave her the caveat, "But you really need to choose your 'no's'..."
Me: "But of course, rhinoplasty is pretty pricey!"
Both of them: glare
Me: How are you like me?
Daughter: I have your inability to listen
Me: What?
Her: I have your inability to listen
Me: Ha ha
Her: I can't believe I fell for that, I was concentrating on my sandwich
