Donald Trump should drop the ball in Times Square on New Years Eve

He certainly has plenty of experience

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DigThisMyBrother
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
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I don't know why people expect Time's Square to put on a decent New Year's Eve show.

They're always dropping the ball.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Elnateo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
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I put my root beer in a square glass

Now I just have beer

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πŸ‘€︎ u/icemage27
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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So proud of my 6 year old. While teaching her to hit a softball, I told her to β€œsquare up on the ball”

She replied β€œthe ball is round daddy” (with a straight face) So I tell her β€œno, what I mean is, get mad! I want you to hit the ball really hard like if you were mad at it!”

She grabs the ball, stares right at it and says β€œI’M REALLY DISAPPOINTED IN YOU, BALL!” Then throws it right back at me.

Proud dad moment.

πŸ‘︎ 12k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Itsjorgehernandez
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2020
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What does the square root of 2 like to describe something awesome as?

Root-ing two-ting

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πŸ‘€︎ u/StrangerBatman01
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2020
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Patel was teaching a boy named Ed basic geometry, which he was failing to grasp even on the most basic levels. He mistook squares for triangles, circles for hexagons and so on...

So Patel tried to go to the lowest level and put a dot on the paper.

"What this, Ed?"

"A line?" the boy replied.

"I... I expected more from you. I'm... This a point, Ed."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/alkaath
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
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Why do they say, be there or be square?

Because you're not around

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
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If someone mails you a square can of meat, DON'T open it!

It's Spam.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IamREBELoe
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
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My girlfriend is the square root of -100.

A perfect 10 but purely imaginary.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BamaPaul
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
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I poured root beer in a square glass, now I have only beer
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WetSoggyTaco
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
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My girlfriend is like square root -100

A straight 10 but imaginary too

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πŸ‘€︎ u/somedudefromsg
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
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My girlfriend is the square root of - 100

She's a perfect 10, but completely imaginary

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xtilexx
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
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My girlfriend is like the square root of -100.

A solid 10, but also imaginary.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bot_10
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2019
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Why are City Morgues always square?

It's because of all of the coroners.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2020
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If I poured root beer into a square glass,

would I just have beer?

πŸ‘︎ 890
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πŸ‘€︎ u/knopper91
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2020
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A square-root
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheSlippyKnot
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2020
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What animal is shaped like a square ?

A squarrel

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2020
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A square ran into a dead end while running away from hundred of circles

He was cornered

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zero_the_Red
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
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I still remember the moment when my math professor told us what the square root of -1 was.

It was unreal.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
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What do you get when you put root beer in a square glass?

Just beer i guess.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eagle_Vision_13
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2020
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A pun-net punnet square
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pixl8er
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2020
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How did the circle know the square had nothing on him?

Because he said he had him cornered.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/saltyquill
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
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Why was the square dance fiddler arrested for smuggling?

Because of his contra band...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/changhaobyu
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
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Square root
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πŸ‘€︎ u/marinthierry
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2020
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What happens to a square when it watches porn

It becomes an erectangle

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fairywithcancer
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
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Square root? Or cube root?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madmoola
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2020
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What do you call 100 penguins in Trafalgar Square?

Lost, they’re lost.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CallMeMrWhite
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2020
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Two rich dudes were hanging out in a bar. One said to the other, "Hey, you wanna come to my square island?"

The other responded "Four shore!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedBluemann
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2020
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Dad: β€œSon, your mother and I are thinking about moving to a square island.”

Son: β€œWow really? Can I come too?”

Dad: β€œFour shore!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/misplacedfreckles
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2020
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Be there or bean square
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πŸ‘€︎ u/moolie-sheep
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2020
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This Square Earth I found at a book store.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Greekboy69Z
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2020
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If I pour root beer into a square glass

Is it just regular beer?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Akbeardman
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2020
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The teacher asked if anyone knew the square root of negative one...

So I shouted β€œI”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MattAmpersand
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2020
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I pour my root beer into a square cup.

Now it's just beer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tanzaniteflame
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2018
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Finally found the square root
πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pyk0th
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2017
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When people say "be there or be square"...

It's because if you're not there, you're not around.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HalfCrazed
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2020
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What happens when you put a plant in a square?

It dies.

Why?
It loses its root

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πŸ‘€︎ u/good_haircut
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
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Do you know why the say "be there or be square?"

Because you're not around.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/acanadianbloake
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2019
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What do you call a square missing a side

An incomplete meal

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πŸ‘€︎ u/epicboi6
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2020
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My girlfriend is like the square root of -100

A solid 10, complex and negative half the time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/phantomPl0x
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2019
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What’s the square root of Orange Julius?

We don’t square roots here, we juice oranges. Get back to work!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LumpadBFarby
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2020
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Why is the circle more trustworthy than the square?

Because he doesn’t have an angle

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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I really wish I had made a pun about how we celebrate New Years Eve in Times Square.

I really dropped the ball on that one.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ajd011394
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2020
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I used to work at a square tyre factory...

It was a real bumpy ride.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TerrySlews
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2019
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I put my root beer in a square glass

And now I have beer.

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DM_me_some_rice
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I poured root beer into a square glass

Now I just have beer

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PIatinumP0tato
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend is like the square root of -100

A solid 10, but also imaginary

πŸ‘︎ 933
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RoyTheShip
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2018
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