Donald Trump should drop the ball in Times Square on New Years Eve
He certainly has plenty of experience
π︎ 9
π
︎ Dec 31 2020
What does the square root of 2 like to describe something awesome as?
π︎ 4
π
︎ Dec 08 2020
So proud of my 6 year old. While teaching her to hit a softball, I told her to βsquare up on the ballβ
She replied βthe ball is round daddyβ (with a straight face) So I tell her βno, what I mean is, get mad! I want you to hit the ball really hard like if you were mad at it!β
She grabs the ball, stares right at it and says βIβM REALLY DISAPPOINTED IN YOU, BALL!β Then throws it right back at me.
Proud dad moment.
π︎ 12k
π
︎ Jun 23 2020
Patel was teaching a boy named Ed basic geometry, which he was failing to grasp even on the most basic levels. He mistook squares for triangles, circles for hexagons and so on...
So Patel tried to go to the lowest level and put a dot on the paper.
"What this, Ed?"
"A line?" the boy replied.
"I... I expected more from you. I'm... This a point, Ed."
π︎ 16
π
︎ Nov 09 2020
My girlfriend is the square root of -100.
A perfect 10 but purely imaginary.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Nov 01 2020
I still remember the moment when my math professor told us what the square root of -1 was.
π︎ 20
π
︎ Jun 25 2020
How did the circle know the square had nothing on him?
Because he said he had him cornered.
π︎ 32
π
︎ May 25 2020
Why was the square dance fiddler arrested for smuggling?
Because of his contra band...
π︎ 2
π
︎ Aug 15 2020
Two rich dudes were hanging out in a bar. One said to the other, "Hey, you wanna come to my square island?"
The other responded "Four shore!"
π︎ 24
π
︎ May 01 2020
The teacher asked if anyone knew the square root of negative one...
π︎ 14
π
︎ Jan 08 2020
Finally found the square root
π︎ 6k
π
︎ Dec 28 2017
Do you know why the say "be there or be square?"
Because you're not around.
π︎ 530
π
︎ Apr 06 2019
Why is the circle more trustworthy than the square?
Because he doesnβt have an angle
π︎ 7
π
︎ Oct 24 2019
The New Year's celebration at Times Square was pretty disappointing.
They really dropped the ball this time.
π︎ 423
π
︎ Jan 01 2019
Do you know where the expression, βbe there or be squareβ comes from?
If youβre not there, youβre not around.
π︎ 1k
π
︎ Feb 19 2018
Did you see they made round bails of hay illegal in Wisconsin? Itβs because the cows werenβt getting a square meal.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Nov 16 2019
You matter. That is, until you multiply yourself by the speed of light squared...
π︎ 32
π
︎ Jun 24 2019
Which state has the most streets per square mile?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Oct 22 2019
The amount of cabbage is directly proportional to the square root of the carrots divided by the volume of the Mayo.
π︎ 72
π
︎ Jun 16 2019
Son: Math sucks so much. My teacher wants me to find the square root of I Donβt Give a Crap.
Dad: Easy! Next time, just tell your teacher I Donβt Give Two Shits.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Sep 11 2019
Son: Arenβt the pyramids really just squares?
Me: Yeah, but only up to a point
π︎ 32
π
︎ May 26 2019
I guess we can call the music in a segment of a popular Square Enix game...
π︎ 3
π
︎ Feb 08 2019
How did the triangle kill the square?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Feb 05 2019
Teaching a 3 year-old the difference between a circle and square is pointless
π︎ 36
π
︎ Apr 16 2019
The villagers gathered as the guards dragged the blacksmith through the town square.
One of the villagers turned and asked another, "what happened?"
She told him, "he's been arrested for forgery."
π︎ 8
π
︎ May 25 2019
My wife said βYou canβt change the square-root of a negative.β
She said I couldnβt..... but i can.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Apr 03 2019
LPT: Want beer but are too young to buy it? Buy rootbeer and put it in a square glass. The square cancels out the root and all that's left is beer!
reddit.com/r/ShittyLifePrβ¦
π︎ 18
π
︎ Jul 05 2018
I accidentally downloaded the Square app for store owners instead of the one for personal use
My dad- "You had no business signing up for that."
π︎ 1k
π
︎ Jun 24 2015
I'm not impressed with the people who organize the New Year's celebration in Times Square
They always drop the ball.
π︎ 15
π
︎ Jan 01 2019
The worlds largest bounce house is now touring the U.S.A. At 10,000 square feet, the house is large enough to live in.
The rent is pretty expensive but that's mostly due to inflation.
π︎ 36
π
︎ Mar 23 2018
I hear there aren't enough bathrooms for the NYE celebration in Time Square.
They really dropped the ball on that one.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Dec 31 2018
The giant Dumbo ad playing at Times Square on new year's eve said "Happy New Year"...
It should have said "Happy New Ear" instead.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 01 2019
My girlfriend called me a square for always following the speed limit.
I told her that I was more like a circle, squares are too edgy for me.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Sep 23 2018
TIL the square root of Pai...
π︎ 13
π
︎ Dec 15 2017
I was attacked by 1, 3, 5, 7 and 9.
The odds were against me.
π︎ 7k
π
︎ Apr 12 2020
My girlfriend is the square root of - 100
She's a perfect 10, but completely imaginary
π︎ 42
π
︎ Aug 22 2020
My girlfriend is like the square root of -100.
A solid 10, but also imaginary.
π︎ 9k
π
︎ Nov 15 2019
My girlfriend is like the square root of -100
A solid 10, but also imaginary
π︎ 936
π
︎ Nov 18 2018
My girlfriend is like the square root of -100
A solid 10, complex and negative half the time.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Nov 16 2019
The New Year's celebration at Times Square was pretty disappointing.
They really dropped the ball this year.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 01 2019
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.