sausage bread will always be by your side

for batter or for wurst

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thekuecker
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2021
🚨︎ report
I just saw two birds flying side by side into the courthouse.

I think they’re called β€œparaleagles.”

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dwqewve
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
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What do you call 2 horses side by side in a stable?

Neigh-bours.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2020
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My "friend" pranked me by putting a dead bird on the driver's side seat of my car...

It was a lark.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2020
🚨︎ report
I used to make extra money by selling illegal tennis equipment on the side, but I was approached by some thugs who told me to stop.

I guess they control the Tennis Racket around here.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
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A cowboy and a Mexican were walking side-by-side by a beach in Mexico. The Cowboy asked to the Mexican if the Gulf of Mexico was an ocean.

"Sea, SeΓ±or," replied the Mexican.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FlumeHound9
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2020
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I'd like to thank my legs for always supporting me, my arms for always being by my side and my fingers...

I could always count on them.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shwastedd
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2017
🚨︎ report
In some religions, dividing the opposite side by the hypotenuse is a sin
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Adam-P-D
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2019
🚨︎ report
By the way, I was looking at the other side
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShadyNite
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend is a pretty unsuccessful farmer. But he tries a lot to promote his business on social media by providing a new profile picture every 3 months. Unfortunately the picture always seems to have his head or side chopped off a bit.

Another season, another bad crop.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chateau512
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the man who was attacked by a bear that ate his whole left side?

He's all right now.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WheelyMac
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2019
🚨︎ report
I didn't really know how to play Texas Hold Em but luckily my friend was by my side to assist with raising and calling...

He was aiding and a-betting!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Last night I turned my wife on by ironing one side of her shirt...

I was pressing all the right buttons.

πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BeardFM
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2016
🚨︎ report
I could never live without you by my side
πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheMaddest_Man
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2018
🚨︎ report
There was a man on the side of the road throwing bits of ice at taxis that drove by.

A concerned passerby stopped and asked him why he was throwing ice at taxis.

The man replied, "I'm hailing a cab."

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WillKay10
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2018
🚨︎ report
All the boats in Denmark and Sweden are required by law to have a barcode on the side.

It's so they can scan-da-navy-in.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Randomd0g
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2018
🚨︎ report
I got fired from my job of making a double or multiple fold in a garment or other item made of cloth, held by stitching the top or side.

I was de-pleated.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2019
🚨︎ report
I once went to work drunk and put too many double or multiple folds in a garment or other item made of cloth, held by stitching at the top or side.

It was replete with pleats.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Why were the two seedless Dates standing side by side so angry?

They were pitted against one another

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PaxPaw
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2018
🚨︎ report
If a business segregated people by sexual orientation, there would inevitably be a homo-side there.
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mutant_Llama1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2016
🚨︎ report
There was a guy who got his entire left side smashed by a train

I heard he is all right now

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_BlNG_
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2016
🚨︎ report
"Could you turn a fridge into a bed by laying it on its side and putting a mattress on top?"

"Hmm...I don't think it'd be very comfortable, but it would be...

...

...

COOL!"

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/acoustic_wave
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2014
🚨︎ report

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