What do you call someone with, a sextant, a stetson, a saxophone and a syringe?

A rooting tooting shooting cowboy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Vesurel
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07
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Saxophone might be considered as the sexiest musical instrument

but there is nothing sounds more horny than brass

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/r96340
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15
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Stole it from r/saxophone
πŸ‘︎ 228
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KnucklesFan2013
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2019
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Shopping at the music store, my friend had to settle for a fiver saxophone ...

They couldn't afford a tenor.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/drozzi007
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2019
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Hear about the saxophone player who switched from a tenor to a soprano saxophone in the middle of the concert?

The press made quite a big deal out of his sax change.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spotted_Lady
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2018
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Got my entire saxophone department today

Today in my classical saxophone class one of the upperclassmen wanted to plan a get together for all of the saxophone majors.

Him: What do your evenings look like?

Me: Dark

More than 30 disapproving college students: Groan

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/My_Name_Is_Sam
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2014
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I'd never let my children watch the orchestra

There's too much sax and violins

Edit: Thank you so much for the gold and silver

πŸ‘︎ 16k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/theDwarfed
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2019
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A man walked into a bar with his pet octopus. He went up to the counter and bet everyone in the bar $50 that they couldn’t bring the octopus a musical instrument that it couldn’t play...

One man pulled an old guitar off the wall that hadn’t been tuned in years and gave it to the octopus.

The octopus took the guitar, tuned it right up and began play.

There was no doubt that the octopus was an excellent guitar player.

The man paid his handler $50 and sat down.

Another man brought a saxophone to the octopus.

The octopus took it and stared for a bit.

After a minute or two the octopus began playing a deep and soulful jazz solo.

This man paid his $50 and sat down.

The bartender went into the back and brought out a set of bag pipes.

The bartender said, β€œI’ll bet $100 that the octopus can’t play these bagpipes.”

The man agreed and handed them to the octopus.

The octopus sat there eyeing the bagpipes up and down for quite awhile.

The handler began to get nervous so he said to the octopus, β€œHurry up and start playing the thing”

The octopus spewed, β€œPlay it?! I wanna marry her!"

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2019
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My friend went to a jazz gig last night.

Told me all about his friend's girlfriend who was playing saxophone.

^You ^know ^what's ^coming.

I asked if she was a saxy lady.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/StrawberryBlind
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2014
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What instrument do English people play?

The Anglo-Saxophone!

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Puggy31
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2014
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Dad joke made during a band performance.

My band had a performance yesterday. We have three saxophone players. One of plays only Alto saxophone, one of them alternates between playing Alto, Tenor and Baritone saxophone and the last plays both Tenor and Baritone saxophone.

The second two kept swapping each other's instruments or one of the other saxophones they had in the background. So at one point we had to wait for them to change while the rest of us were all ready to start playing the next song.

So, trying to make it less awkward for the audience I turn to them and I says 'I'm sorry, they're just playing ... Musical Instruments'

There was a collective groan/laugh from the audience and the drummer went ba-dum-tish And the trumpeter gave me a little wah wah wah waaaaaaaaaaaah

I'm still giggling about it.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gonnnondorf
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2014
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Musical Instruments Galore

My father was quite the musician.

His favorite instrument was the saxophone.

Growing up, I’d hear him practice on it every night after work for hours upon hours.

One night, I heard an awful SCREECH and my Dad howled in pain.

"Dad, are you alright?!?"

"Don’t worry, son, it’s just a saxident."

knowdadjokes.tumblr.com

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/knowdadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2014
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