Retail Stores Puns

You'd be at the lowest of Lowe's

They both got 6 months

But the cashier keeps putting them back.

I'd put the torches in the darkest part of the shop.

The cashier asked him if he wanted to be a member there and he said Yes so the cashier proceeded to ask "okay what's your street name?" He relied "tall white boy from the hood"

This one doesn't work as well typed out, but it's still pretty good. A co-worker was putting up a basket of returns, and he stopped by to ask me where the Efferdent goes. I said "I don't know, maybe you should put some more effort into it."

"No thanks, I've got two."

A retail store

The Retail store

I was just assigned an architecture project to design a retail building of some sort. The products, name and theme are all free for me to choose, so I want to make it a killer pun.

What's a punny store name/product combo I can use?

I was working the closing shift at a retail store where every associate carries a walkie. Before closing time, a manager will generally ask which departments need help zoning (cleaning, facing merchandise, etc) and the associates will help the other departments. The other night:

Manager: -kssht- How are we on the floor?

Me:- kssht- Gravity.

So i took him to the retail store for a new one.

Finance

I work in a retail store with credit card financing signs all over the place. It was slow and boring, so I fixated on said word.

The boy is worried, thinking the mouses life is ruined since it no longer has its tail. The father says "Don't worry son, it can always go to the retail store"

High.

This is a real deal "joke" from my dad today. The first retail mj store just opened in his town. He's 60.

I work at a supplement retail store and usually greet people with "Hey! How are you today? What brings you in today?" and usually people will just tell me what they are looking for. So, I did the same thing to a man ~50 years old today, but instead of the usual response I get, he just responded with "My feet."

10/10. Would be dad-joked again.

The RETAIL store!

my 4 year old slapped me for saying this. haha

My 9yo saw my wife's shopping bag she brought home from the "TYPO" gift store and declared, "Hey, they spelt it wrong."

I said, "Maybe it was just a 'typo'..."

(Photo of TYPO Store) http://www.canelandcentral.com.au/~/media/retail/au/caneland-central/stores/typo8905.ashx?as=0&mh=1130

My dad walked in and my dog was so excited and his tail was wagging so fast.

Me (to my dog) - If your tail wags any fast it's going to fall off

Dad (to my dog) - Then we'll have to take you to the retail store.

"No, I'm a freight-not"

For those who don't know, in retail and similar stores, when a truck comes in delivering merchandise, it's the freight truck.

The lady, son, and I were in a retail store the other day when an annoucement was made over the PA system.

"Customer needs assistance in the vacuum cleaners"

I lean towards the wife and say, "Well this Hoover sucks. Oh, the Dyson it also sucks. To be honest, they all suck."

I work at a retail grocery store in the deli. I am also 6'7". I was tasked with detailing our warmer and I was working on the bottom part. Getting down is my natural enemy so I was sitting on a milk crate. Coworker from meat department comes over and asks if we had his squeegee. We did so I told him. He said, "For shame, you should feel bad." I then told him, "You're going to judge me while I'm at my lowest?"

A retail store

They go to the retail store.

The retail store

The retail store

The retail store

He went to the retail store

A retail store.

The retail store.

To a RETAIL store

To the retail store!

the retail store

To the retail store

To a retail store.

To a retail store!

The retail store

The retail store.

The retail store

The retail store

The retail store.