There's a medicine you can buy that apparently cures scepticism.
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︎ Jan 23 2021
My wife raises animals and also sells medicines
She's a farmercist
(based on a true story)
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︎ Feb 16 2021
What do you call it when a Mexican man takes medicines for his anxiety
Hispanic attacks his panic attacks
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︎ Feb 07 2021
Given that a case of the sniffles means staying home from school, we give my daughter a daily allergy medicine. My wife was giving her breakfast before school, and when I walked out, I asked if sheβd had her medicine yet.
My daughter said yes, and I replied, βSo youβre de-Claritin that youβve had it already?β
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︎ Jan 17 2021
Did you hear the Journal of Modern Medicine rejected an article about Midol?
The editor said it was not current at all, but more of a period piece!
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︎ Dec 21 2020
My ADHD medicine comes in a case shaped like a 3-sided polygon where each side is the same size, and the pills are distributed uniformly.
It's an equal Adderall triangle.
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︎ Dec 01 2020
Don't you think Gonorrhoea would be a great name for Diarrhea medicine?
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︎ Aug 26 2020
I started practicing complementary medicine.
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︎ Nov 20 2020
I made a medicine using ducks that can cure cancer...
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︎ Oct 30 2020
Medicine
Where do fish go to get medicine The pharmasea
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︎ Oct 22 2020
In Greek Mythology, Chiron was not only half man and half horse, he was also a doctor of medicine
That made him the centaur for disease control
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︎ Aug 27 2020
Instead of medicine, my hippie girlfriend cured her hemorrhoid using only the "power of positive suggestion."
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︎ Sep 29 2020
My wife and I went to the Museum of Medicine and we were browsing the exhibits...
Wife: "Look, they used to treat pain with willow bark".
Me: "I'll give that one 3 stars".
Wife: "This one is about the invention of antibiotics".
Me: "I'll give it 8 out of 10".
Wife: "Apparently, they used give people cowpox to protect them from smallpox".
Me: "Definitely 2 thumbs up".
Wife: "Why do you keep doing that?".
Me: "I'm the curator of this museum"!
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︎ Aug 08 2020
My dad is getting too old for a medicine cabinet.
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︎ Aug 24 2020
They say laughter is the best medicine but where do you get it?
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︎ Jun 16 2020
What Do You Call a Type of Medicine That Youβre Related To?
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︎ Jun 28 2020
You know what wouldβve been a good name for a diarrhea medicine?
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︎ Aug 02 2020
Decided on a career change, from the kitchen to medicine. Didnβt last long though.
Turns out that thyme doesnβt heal all wounds.
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︎ Jul 18 2020
My medicine makes me depressed
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︎ Jul 22 2020
How does Vanna White take her constipation medicine?
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︎ Jun 08 2020
Did you hear about the new topical birth control medicine?
Theyβre calling it Sonblock.
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︎ Jul 04 2020
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︎ Apr 24 2020
Viagra is the worst medicine for depression.
Because everything will get only harder.
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︎ Dec 30 2019
Why did the little boy tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
Because he heard there were sleeping pills in there.
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︎ Mar 04 2020
What is the medicine vampires takes when sick ?
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︎ Dec 19 2019
How many jokes about medicine does it take before people get sick of them?
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︎ Jun 21 2019
Baguette medicine is what I need
π︎ 13
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︎ Jul 28 2019
If you looked into my medicine cabinet...
...you would assume I have very conflicting views on biotics.
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︎ Nov 24 2019
My schizophrenia medicine is really messing with me...
and me and me and me and me.
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︎ Dec 08 2019
Tonight, my daughter assisted me in hanging a new medicine cabinet.
Me: I think I measured wrong. The toggle bolts aren't lining up with the darned holes. Man, I really screwed this up.
Her: Did you........make a pun?
Me: concentrating on the task at hand Huh?
Her: Never mind.
Me: gets it Ha! No, but that's awesome! "Screwed" it up. Ha! You're a PunMaster!
Her: You're a dork.
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︎ Aug 12 2019
Just when I thought medicine had gone to the dogs...
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︎ Oct 24 2018
"Hey can you give me, like, medicine?"
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︎ Apr 07 2019
What is Halloween's favorite medicine?
Any brand of coffin cold.
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︎ Oct 31 2019
There was a farmer selling his produce at the side of the road, I pulled over as I was a bit hungry to get an apple. I noticed he also sold paracetamol and cough medicine. I asked him "why do you sell drugs?"
He said "I'm a farmer see"
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︎ Jun 13 2019
My doctor said that my sleeping medicine can cause Alzheimer's
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︎ Jul 07 2019
What medicine did the bed take?
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︎ Aug 21 2018
What the best way to package cold sore medicine?
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︎ Jul 06 2019
Does medicine make you happy?
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︎ Apr 14 2019
Try not to make noise by the medicine cabinet.
You might wake the sleeping pills.
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︎ Mar 06 2019
What kind of medicine did the tree take for its aches and pains?
π︎ 8
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︎ Feb 22 2019
Where do fish go to get medicine
π︎ 13
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︎ Jul 29 2020
Gonorrhea would have been a great name for diarrhea medicine
π︎ 31k
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︎ Jan 20 2018
Gonorrhea wouldβve been a great name for Diarrhea medicine
π︎ 8k
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︎ Jul 15 2018
In Greek mythology, Chiron was half man, half horse. He had knowledge and wisdom in medicine.
You could say he was the centaur for disease control
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︎ Jan 01 2020
Gonorrhea would have been an excellent name for diarrhea medicine.
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︎ Jul 03 2019
Gonorrhea would have been a great name for diarrhea medicine
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︎ Dec 28 2018
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