I go to the gym religiously.
About twice a year around the holidays.
I’m dieting religiously.
I no longer eat in church.
Our aunt made a religiously-themed painting. After looking at it, my brother told me we're going to hell.
"We have seen the Aunty Christ."
Mike Tyson is a religious guy.
He punches people in the faith.
Did you know bees tend to have unusual religious beliefs?
That's because they're insects
Which dictator is considered a hedonist by most religious practitioners?
What’s the majority of cows religious beliefs?
What kind of birds are religious?
I recently watched a documentary on Mike Tyson. I had no idea he was so religious...
He kept saying he likes to hit people in the FAITH!!!
Whats the kinkiest religious building called?
For religious people, life is a pray-to-win game.
What religious positions are open for women?
I know a religious woman living in a monastery who studies the encyclopedia...
I don’t go to church much…
But I do drink religiously...
I recently staged an intervention for my religious feline addict.
Needless to say, he's not a Catholic anymore.
I hired a group of protestant religious sect members to haul my furniture to my new house...
They were movers and Shakers.
What's a religious businessperson's favorite type of business?
How did the religious man cross the raging river?
I decided to leave my strict, religious Pennsylvanian community to raise ducks. When I told my father, he said "Son, you have a choice"
You can either be a Quaker, or a Quacker.
Do you know that a religious person should have bagels for breakfast everyday?
They are as holy as food can get.
Do you know what is the most religious chord?
A conversation with my 11 year old this morning...
Son: Dad, there's a hole in your t-shirt.
Me: I know, it's my religious t-shirt.
Son: gives me a blank look
Me: It's holy!
What do you call a metal religious woman?
What do you call a religious cat-lover?
What do you call a religious hawk?
Why doesn't Santa have much of a religious opinion during the holidays?
Due to his diet, he tends to be eggnog-stic
What did the illiterate guy say when he saw a religious referee on a morning jog?
What do you call a religious fruit?
I don't drink for religious reasons.
I drink for completely other reasons.
What's a surfer's favorite religious book?
I tried to join a secret religious society, but the requirements were very strict.
It was called Diffi cult.
My friend loves fancy cheese so much it's almost religious.
You might say she has a personal relationship with cheeses.
Who is the most religious animal in the animal kingdom?
The mantis, because they are always praying.
My very religious Aunt attends mass daily.
She says that's because missing church for seven days makes one weak!
When you're not religious but will always throw a party
Why are Eagles so religious?
because they’re birds of prey
He came out as bi to his religious mother. She went to the Fish and Wildlife Service to ask for help.
She didn't know how to handle a bison
I had to fire my Christian guitar tutor. He was too religious. I wanted to learn guitar, but all he kept talking about was
How many religious women does it take to change a lightbulb?
What do you call a religious nomad?
Which animal species is the most religious?
Which birds are the most religious?
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