Four Seasons Total Lawn Care created some good ones after the bizarre press conference Saturday such as "Lawn and Order" and "Make America Rake Again" - I don't see them using this one on their promotional materials though:
👍︎ 4
💬︎
👤︎ u/danarchist
📅︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
If you rake a leaf pattern, you leave a rake pattern.
👍︎ 7
💬︎
👤︎ u/luleigas
📅︎ Nov 13 2017
🚨︎ report
I was raking and found a hornet's nest

I couldn't bee leaf it

👍︎ 3
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 28 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call a slutty farmer?

A garden hoe.

👍︎ 12
💬︎
📅︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the casino groundskeeper get fired?

He thought the 2.5% rake policy applied to leaves.

👍︎ 4
💬︎
📅︎ Nov 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Every time I grill I get raked over the coals by my family. Apparently brat jokes are the wurst.
👍︎ 7
💬︎
👤︎ u/wiseshanks
📅︎ Oct 12 2018
🚨︎ report
I used to have a job collecting leaves

I was raking it in

👍︎ 31
💬︎
📅︎ Sep 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Now that the Fall is officially here, I can't wait to make tons of extra money gathering leaves..

.. last year I raked it in.

👍︎ 20
💬︎
📅︎ Sep 25 2020
🚨︎ report
A couple of my favourites...

Why do Swedish warships have barcodes one them? So that when they dock, they can Scandinavian.

And then these work as a one-two punch:

I started a business building yachts from home...sails have been going through the roof.

And before that I had a business clearing the fallen leaves from people's backyards. I was raking it in.

👍︎ 17
💬︎
📅︎ Sep 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Gardeners in autumn must be raking it in.
👍︎ 7
💬︎
📅︎ Nov 10 2017
🚨︎ report
Raking at my place of worship gave birth to an unfunny dad joke

I was gathering the leaves from my huge pile of leaves and placing them in a garbage bag inside of a garbage can. To squeeze them down, I lifted my foot up and stomped on the leaves. One of my buddies who's like 13 says to me from the other side of the fence "All you can do is hurt leaves." I stare back at him and say "so the others know they better leave me alone."

👍︎ 7
💬︎
👤︎ u/elcielo17
📅︎ Nov 23 2014
🚨︎ report
Whats a bakers favourite joke

A cinnamon pun

👍︎ 12
💬︎
👤︎ u/reapsr2355
📅︎ Jan 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I had a really good job at the park sweeping leaves,

I was just raking it in!

👍︎ 15
💬︎
📅︎ May 09 2020
🚨︎ report
This Fall, I got a great job cleaning leaves in my neighborhood.

I was raking it in.

👍︎ 22
💬︎
📅︎ Feb 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the news about the shovel?

It's ground breaking.

But the broom?

That really swept the nation.

👍︎ 11
💬︎
👤︎ u/-da-bloos-
📅︎ Jun 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the garden tools break up?

Because the rake couldnt handle that his girlfriend was a hoe.

👍︎ 26
💬︎
👤︎ u/Mt105
📅︎ May 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Breaking Bad
👍︎ 5
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 10 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of shoes do frogs wear?

Open toad

Edit- got this off the back of a cereal box but damn love raking in this new text post juicy karma.

👍︎ 2k
💬︎
👤︎ u/Driddle07
📅︎ Jul 21 2016
🚨︎ report
Came in from doing yardwork, sweaty and hot

Said to my father, "It's hot out there."

He said, "The sun must be out."

I said, "The son is out, trimming trees with the mom!"

Eyes rolled.

👍︎ 113
💬︎
📅︎ Jun 22 2017
🚨︎ report
If Drake loved to clean, what would he be called?

Rake.

👍︎ 4
💬︎
👤︎ u/Pdonkey
📅︎ Dec 23 2018
🚨︎ report
My buddy and I used to have jobs collecting leaves.

Boy, we were raking it in.

👍︎ 5
💬︎
📅︎ Aug 22 2018
🚨︎ report
I found a place that lets you sell leaves for money.

I'm raking it in.

👍︎ 9
💬︎
📅︎ Nov 26 2018
🚨︎ report
I bought a leaf broom for my bakery...

... now I'm raking in the dough.

👍︎ 3
💬︎
👤︎ u/TheLe99
📅︎ Apr 10 2018
🚨︎ report
Dad joked my dad.

Dad: "if you're not doing anything can you rake up the leaves?.... Actually don't worry about it, I'll do it later"

Me: "so I should leaf it then?

👍︎ 5
💬︎
👤︎ u/luklux
📅︎ May 19 2015
🚨︎ report
The wife just rolled her eyes.

I was raking leaves in the backyard.

Wife: Boy there sure are a lot of leaves in the yard.

Me: I know, its unbeLEAFable!

Heh, I still think its funny.

👍︎ 17
💬︎
📅︎ Jan 15 2014
🚨︎ report
Looking forward to the Fall, when I can make serious money gathering leaves..

..Raked it in last year.

👍︎ 22
💬︎
📅︎ Jul 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I miss my old job collecting leaves.

I was raking it in.

👍︎ 7
💬︎
👤︎ u/Rav4xle
📅︎ May 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I used to have a job collecting leaves...

I was raking it in

👍︎ 2k
💬︎
👤︎ u/Reg182
📅︎ May 21 2017
🚨︎ report
I used to have a job collecting leaves.

I was raking it in.

👍︎ 20
💬︎
📅︎ Apr 07 2018
🚨︎ report
I used to have a job that involved collecting leaves?

I was raking it in.

👍︎ 7
💬︎
📅︎ Aug 04 2017
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.