Why couldn't the green pepper practice archery?
because It didn't habenero . .
They say practice healthy eating…
I told my bowmen that I would pay anytime they need to get some practice in at the course.
They’re free range archers now.
What do you call a killing before yoga practice?
My son had a rough time at little league practice - after striking out three times, he lost interest and wouldn’t stop smelling the dandelions in the outfield, getting one stuck in his nose.
I’m not good with conversations, so I practice talking to large rocks.
It helps me speak boulder.
My army instructor told me he didn’t see me at camouflage practice today.
“Thank you, sir!” I replied.
Everyone keeps telling me to practice social distancing,
but when am I supposed to stop practicing and actually do it?
I had a minor accident at the practice
Accidentally played a major
I may not be a dad for a while, but I’m getting some good practice in.
What do you call it when a bowler knocks down all the pins in a practice frame?
I was having trouble playing a song on guitar and my teacher said "practice to a tick"
It didn't work at all and now I have Lyme disease
What do you call sick highschoolers who practice social distancing?
Wife: Remember to practice safe snacks and to use condiments
Me: Baby stop, you’re making me hungry
What type of practice is Dr. Pepper?
I read an article about Eskimo hunting practices today
Their method for hunting polar bears was the most interesting. They would start a fire out on a deep snow bank, and essentially melt a hole in the snow. Once the hole was big enough they would stop feeding it firewood and let it burnout on its own. Once the fire had gone down and was nothing more than smoldering ashes with a little bit of smoke, they would line the edge of the fire pit with snow peas.
All they had to do from there is hide and wait. Once a bear caught scent of the smoke and starts to investigate, the bear would eventually start eating some of the peas. Then they sneak up behind it and kick it in the ash-hole.
I always use avocados in target practice...
I guess you could make some Glockamole.
With daily practice, the lumberjack’s musical ability improved
I don't practice "social distancing."
After 30 years of social anxiety and a deep disgust of humanity in general, I operate on an "expert" level.
Did your mom have to remind you to practice piano?
No, I did it on my own a chord.
Tonight I took my son to hockey practice and realized my wife forgot to pack his jersey from the dryer.
She told me she had everything, and I was in a rush. So it got left behind. Figured it out right away as we were getting him changed and messaged my wife. She said she would bring it right away. I told my son "You mom is going to run your jersey over"
Without skipping a beat, he replied "Well that won't work, practice will probably be over. I wish she would just drive it over"
Then he gave me a huge grin. I told him he won the dad joke of the day and he continued smiling all the way until bedtime.
What do you call a practice tickle?
Do you suppose Amish pyromaniacs practice barn razing?
When Amish build barns it's called "barn raising". But raze is also a term to destroy, ruin or flatten.
Yiu know what kind of Martial Arts Jesus practices?
Why wasn't the pony able to sing his solo at choir practice?
TIL that sea-faring pirates were quite progressive in their labor practices, reserving a portion of their loot into an early sort of worker's comp, paying for peg-legs and hooks.
They weren't big fans of arrrbitration.
A man showed up to my psychiatric practice dressed only in Saran Wrap requesting diagnosis.
I told him, “I can plainly see your nuts.”
What do you call a veterinarian who practices chiropracty?
What do you call a couple that practices natural family planning?
Suddenly qualified to tell dad jokes
Who needs sex when you can practice your unicycle puns
What’s the best time to practice racket sports?
Practice safe calculations
What religion do most llamas practice?
What do musicians over 40 practice?
What did the pirate practice on the organ?
Why would somebody hire a lawyer that just practices law?
I was at track practice and I made a joke and ever since then we’ve made that joke every day.
What's the difference between someone who bought a house and someone who practices their electrician skills?
One's a home owner and the other's an ohm honer.
Doctor: You need to practice child spacing
Me: The mothers to my 3 kids are in 3 different states
Why couldn't the green pepper practice archery
Because it didn't habanero
Why couldn't the Green Pepper practice Archery?
because it didn't habanero
Why didn't the green pepper practice archery?
Because it didn't habanero.
Why didn't the green pepper practice archery?
Because it didn't habanero.
Why couldn't the green pepper practice archery?
. . . because it didn't habanero!
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