i’m giving up masturbating for an entire month
sorry, poor punctuation.
i’m giving up! masturbating for an entire month.
I entered my sons room and said, "Remember, boy, masturbating can make you go blind."
"I'm over here dad." He replied.
My wife walked in on me masturbating to an optical illusion.
I said, “Honey, it’s not what it looks like!”
A whale is masturbating. His sperm shoots out and thanks him.
He replies " You're whale cum!"
What do you call a masturbating cow?
So a man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells he needs to stop masturbating, the man asks why
The doctor replies "because I'm trying to examine you!"
My SO confessed to masturbating alone instead of seeking out sex with me.
Didn't see that one coming
We caught the drummer of our band masturbating over his drum kit...
I guess the pervert thinks of them as sex cymbals.
What do you call a bunch of cows masturbating in a field?
A man was masturbating, when the blood was suddenly cut off to his brain...
...he was having a stroke
If a guy is addicted to masturbating but then gets addicted to sex, is it fair to say
His addiction got out of hand
The knight had many standing positions for masturbating to chose from
Depending on the circumstances
I found an alien masturbating in my freezer last night.
I asked him what on earth he was doing in there. All he said was, "I cum in
peas".
I once walked in on my son masturbating in his suit.
I have to admit though, he was quite a dapper fapper
Fasting from masturbating should be called "Fasturbating".
What do you call a cow masturbating in a field?
Dad: Chuckling as he reads the menu
Me: What's so funny?
Dad: What do you call a cow masturbating in a field?
Me: blank stare
Dad: Beef stroganoff
The worst part about having depression is masturbating; clearly nuttin's going to come of it.
Why is Kylo Ren masturbating?
Did you hear about the funeral where a guy was caught masturbating?
Turned out to be a real tear-jerker.
One day, a vampire decided to try masturbating.
What do you call someone masturbating into open water?
What do you call a cow masturbating?
What do you call a masturbating cow?
Doctor: You need to stop masturbating, sir
Me: Why?
Doctor: Because I'm trying to examine you.
What do you call cattle masturbating?
What do call a masturbating cow?
Dad: "Son, if you don't stop masturbating, you'll go blind!"
Son: "Dad, I'm over here..."
What do you call a masturbating cow
My girlfriend walked in on me masturbating to an optical illusion
I told her "babe it's not what it looks like"
What do you call a masturbating cow?
What do you call a masturbating cow?
What do you call a masturbating cow
what do you call a masturbating cow?
What do you call a masturbating bull?
What do you call a masturbating cow?
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