Masturbation is the most significant discovery in human history

I would argue that masturbation is the human animal's most important adaptation. The very cornerstone of our technological civilization. Our hands evolved to grip tools, all rightβ€”including our own. You see, thinkers, inventors, and scientists are usually geeks, and geeks have a harder time getting laid than anyone. Without the built-in sexual release valve provided by masturbation, it's doubtful that early humans would have ever mastered the secrets of fire or discovered the wheel. And you can bet that Galileo, Newton, and Einstein never would have made their discoveries if they hadn't first been able to clear their heads by slapping the salami (or "knocking a few protons off the old hydrogen atom"). The same goes for Marie Curie. Before she discovered radium, you can be certain she first discovered the little man in the canoe.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/background1077
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2019
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I was reading the history of the French Revolution, and just found out what happened to Louis XVI β€˜s head.

[removed]

πŸ‘︎ 30k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2019
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Decided to look up the history of the β€œHosanna Shout” and laughed out loud when I read this in the article. Picturing all the exmos shouting β€œHosanna” when they masturbate now. πŸ˜‚ https://www.lds.org/new-era/1973/09/q-and-a-questions-and-answers/what-is-the-hosanna-shout?lang=eng
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LauraBlevins
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2019
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wyr have your cock-to-ball torture website profile revealed to your friends and family with all of your viewing history OR your coworkers find you furiously masturbating with your boss in the restroom?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/findmyiPad-
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2020
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The percentage of people who masturbate with their right hands has drastically declined in the last 20 years compared to all of previous human history
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pinsorthepeople
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
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Beware of the scientists and researchers who claim that watching porn and masturbation is perfectly normal, these people are on payroll of the porn companies, porn companies pay them hefty amount of money and they spread wrong information on the internet. People can do anything for money.

Many of them are fake doctors, don't listen to them. Listen to the community, a whole bunch of 550k people can't be wrong, you have felt what consistent porn and fap do to your brain and body, so follow the signs and symptoms. Don't follow those research bullshit. I think those doctors and researchers are addicted too.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ToxicYTS
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2020
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'Masturbation photos' prompt Tunisia's #MeToo anger - Photos of a man allegedly masturbating in a car outside a high school in Tunisia have prompted an outpouring of stories by women about the sexual abuse and harassment they have experienced. bbc.com/news/world-africa…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ManiaforBeatles
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2019
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I [20F] don't want to take my boyfriend [24M] to my sorority events because they're all super hot and he has a history of masturbating (?) to hot new acquaintances Facebook profiles

I [20F] am a member of a sorority with extremely good looking girls. Many of them are models and/or instagram famous, and sleep with professional athletes and famous musicians. Unlike most of my sisters, I am a 6/10, maybe 7 if I'm being generous. I'm not even sure why my sorority wanted me, as a lot of sororities choose people based heavily on looks (yes, it's true), especially at schools where Greek life is a big deal. As a side note, I love my sisters and don't resent them for being beautiful. They are not just good-looking, most of them are also nice, smart, and fun.

My boyfriend [24M] of one year has always had a wandering eye. Whenever we hang out around a hot girl he's never met before, I catch him stalking her Facebook profile for weeks after, usually while in the bathroom or at weird hours of the night. I don't know for sure that he's masturbating to their pictures but it certainly looks that way. I have no problem with porn and watch it myself, but masturbating to people's Facebook profiles just seems too... personal. It makes me feel horrible about myself and I feel like he's just settling for me (he doesn't have great skills with the females- I actually picked him up when we first met).

He's a member of a frat so there are a lot of date events I want to take him to, but I'm afraid to hang out with him around such hot girls for fear that he'll develop another infatuation.

Please don't berate me, I know my self-esteem is very low, and I know I'm the problem, not him. I'm looking for advice on how to get over it and feel comfortable taking him to my sorority events. If someone has dealt with similar issues I would also like to hear your story and how it panned out.

Thanks!

tl;dr: want to take my bf to sorority events but am afraid he'll masturbate to their FB profiles, as he's done in the past

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mysororitysisters
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2016
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GOP Accused of 'Greatest Cover-Up Since Watergate' as Senate Set to End First Witness-Less Impeachment Trial in US History commondreams.org/news/202…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TrixyUkulele
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2020
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Joe Biden Has a Long History of Giving Republicans What They Want - For Republicans, Joe Biden has long been the ideal negotiating partner β€” because he’s so willing to cave in on most anything Republicans want. jacobinmag.com/2020/02/jo…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Demon-Rat
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2020
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I just finished reading a book on the history of metal fasteners.

I have to say it was absolutely riveting.

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
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Apparently bringing more suffering into the world to SPREAD MUH GENES is desirable, and masturbation (which has happened since the beginning of time) is bad. Blue ball time
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Initial-Duck
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2020
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Bernie Sanders Thinks Companies That Sell Your Browser History Are β€˜Trampling Over the Rights of Consumers’ vice.com/en_us/article/k7…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sideAccount42
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2020
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30 years from now you’re a professor of Meme history. What’s your first topic?
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2019
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How are the gays blamed for abortion?!?! Not to mention masturbation or contraception. That’s not how any of this works!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kraftsingles45
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Student in Peru makes history by writing thesis in the Incas’ language - A doctoral student in Peru has made history by becoming the first person to write and defend a thesis in Quechua – the language of the Incas, which is still spoken by millions of people in the Andes. theguardian.com/world/201…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ManiaforBeatles
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2019
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Just in my generation I was taught that masturbation made you gay, Blacks would NEVER hold the priesthood because they were less valiant and you pantomimed your own death by slashing your throat for revealing the secrets of the temple. Oh yeah big foot was Cain

Welcome to ever evolving and changing doctrine of Mormonism. Have fun following profit Rusty. He's accelerating the shit show!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chainsaw1960
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
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Why do all movies show the notion of masturbation with lotion?

I know it’s a weird question, but I have never been inclined to use hand lotion while masturbating. Do all other guys use it?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BuschOnTap
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2020
🚨︎ report
[bobnitengale] MLB is expected to hand down one of the harshest penalties in the sport’s history against the #Astros when their investigation is completed by the end of the month. twitter.com/bnightengale/…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/makingsomeeggs
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2020
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[IN] Living with 5 girls in family with history of sexual abuse. They spied on me recently without me knowing while I was masturbating. Now one is saying I have been molesting them.

One of the girls seemed very upset that her sisters saw me. I left the home because I felt very vulnerable. Now I am hearing that same girl is accusing me of molesting her and her three sisters and that they may be able to describe my penis in detail.

It turns out there was a hole in an air vent / air duct that only kids could fit in and see. It is otherwise pitch black. I know this is hard to believe, but both the mother and I checked the room because I change in there (and do personal things as well) and thought all vents, windows, etc. were completely sealed off.

This is extended family of mine for context as far as why I'm living with 5 young girls. The father was pushed out of the home for sexually abusing his kids.

I feel incredibly vulnerable right now. Up until this point, the mother and I have been talking about getting the family a house. I have the income to do it. No one has asked me for money or anything.

I am not sure if CPS has been called yet. Police have not yet interrogated me. I don't know what to say other than nothing.

Call a lawyer obviously. Any estimate of costs? Can't I just not say anything or tell the truth? Obviously step away from that side of the family but shouldn't I be OK just saying "No" or "I have nothing to say"? Because I honestly have no idea what's going on right now... I am trying to stay calm but it is HARD!!! I just got word of it and it's being taken very seriously. I won't be surprised if I'm in jail soon but why should I be???

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2019
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I'm Kirk Johnson, paleontologist and Sant Director of the Smithsonian National Museum of Natural History. AMA!

I’m Dr. Kirk Johnson, the Sant Director of the Smithsonian National Museum of Natural History. Here, I oversee the nation’s natural history collection: more than 146 million specimens and artifacts that together comprise the largest collection of its kind in the world. Each year, the museum hosts more than 5 million visitors and its scientists publish more than 800 scientific research papers and name more than 300 new species.

On June 8, 2019, we opened The David H. Koch Hall of Fossils-Deep Time, a 31,000 square-foot exhibition that interprets the history of life on Earth and its relevance to the future of humanity. The exhibit is packed with real fossils and skeletons including a Tyrannosaurus rex from Montana, an elephant-sized EremotheriumGround Sloth from Panama, a Diplodocus from Utah, a Stegosaurus from Colorado, a 50-million-year-old palm frond from Alaska and hundreds more. The museum also houses a 52-foot-long model of the extinct Carcharocles megalodon shark.

Before my arrival to the Smithsonian in 2012, I worked as a paleontologist at the Denver Museum of Nature & Science where I led expeditions in 18 states and 11 countries. My research focuses on fossil plants and the extinction of the dinosaurs, and has taken me from the polar regions to the equatorial rainforests. In 2011, I led an ice age excavation near Snowmass Village in Colorado that recovered parts of more than 50 mastodon skeletons.

I’m known for my scientific articles, popular books, museum exhibitions, documentaries, and collaborations with artists. My recent documentaries include Ice Age Death Trap (2012), Making North America (2015), The Great Yellowstone Thaw (2017), and The Day the Dinosaurs Died (2017). My current show, NOVA’S Polar Extremes, which premiered on PBS on Feb. 5, uses the fossil record from the Arctic and the Antarctic to show that the polar regions were ice-free and forested for much of Earth’s history.

My recent book, Cruisin’ the Fossil Coastline, The Travels of an Artist and a Scientist along the Shores of the Prehistoric Pacific (2018) explores the deep history of the West Coast from California to Alaska. And my upcoming book, Trees are made of Gas, The Story of Carbon and Climate, will be published this fall.

I’m originally from Bellevue, Washington and have a bachelor’s degree from Amherst College, a master’s from the University of Pennsylvania and a doctorate in

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kirk_Johnson1
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2020
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"We see people in their thirties with no medical history, images of lungs are terrifying" vrt.be/vrtnws/nl/2020/03/…
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SNM_2_0
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2020
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Men who are able to seperate orgasm and ejaculation from start to finish how did you do it and how has your sex/masturbation life improved because of it.

Personally I'm a little envious of men, being able to orgasm is a very easy thing for you but no one really tells you about your sexual potential. You can have a standard sneeze orgasm, or you can edge, or you can even get close to female pleasure by multiple prostate orgasms. So if you were explaining it to someone close to you how do you orgasm without ejaculation??

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Curiosityx
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2020
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Have any of you guys ever thought that masturbation during puberty could've stunted your growth?

I started masturbating at 10 years old, and I've been doing it pretty much every day ever since. I've done it excessively throughout puberty. Sometimes I wonder if this could've had an effect on the size of my penis.

My penis just seemed to never grow, and I wonder if it could've been because of my excessive masturbating starting at a young age.

Like when you ejaculate, do you lose a bit of testosterone?

What do you guys think?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LilDev1997
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
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What is the most important thing about masturbation that most of men don't know?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GdBoss
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2020
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Youtube is demonitizing videos that explore the history of WWII youtube.com/watch?v=-Ze6-…
πŸ‘︎ 40k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mycotoxicjoy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2019
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MJ on Best Ever: I never can accept that role. There's a lot of guys that influenced my game, if I didn't see them there's no way my game would've evolved. / I'm not here campaigning for best player in the world or history, I'm not saying that, because everybody plays differently in different eras streamable.com/hdpnk
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πŸ‘€︎ u/babbagack
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2019
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Despite his false claims, Republicans trust Trump for accurate information on COVID-19 over the CDC. Republicans believe Trump over health experts, despite his extensive history of lying about the new coronavirus salon.com/2020/03/26/desp…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DaFunkJunkie
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2020
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For all that BFA got wrong, Drustvar is one of the best zones in WoW’s history! Definitely a high point of this expansion
πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrplow3
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Which flag used during the history of your country do you like the most?

Disregarding the political aspect of the time it was used, only considering aesthetics.

Personally, I don't have a lot to work with with Switzerland, but I think the flag of the regiment of the Swiss guards at the French court looks kind of interesting. It was never used in Switzerland itself though.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Megelsen
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2020
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This will always be the best comeback in the history of the show
πŸ‘︎ 57k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iknowthisischeesy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
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Polish PM claims Russia's rewriting of history is a threat to Europe emerging-europe.com/news/…
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HydrolicKrane
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
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Why Is Bloomberg's Long History of Egregious Sexism Getting a Pass? gq.com/story/bloomberg-se…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/futuredude
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Astronomers detect biggest explosion in history of the universe: Researchers say the blast is the biggest since the Big Bang. It occurred at the center of a galaxy cluster 390 million light years away dw.com/en/astronomers-det…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DoremusJessup
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2020
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Your girlfriend says we need to talk, she sits you down and pulls out a printed list of your internet browsing history, what do you say?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AsyncProper
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2020
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Borderlands 3 has sold in 5 million copies after its first 5 days of launch making Borderlands 3 the fastest-selling title in 2K history and highest-selling title for the label on PC newsroom.2k.com/news/bord…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Turbostrider27
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Tom Hanks’ masturbation toward the end of β€œApollo 13” was not scripted, and Hanks told director Ron Howard to make the jizz float off his dong in post production because of the zero gravity. Howard refused to change it, telling Hanks, β€œThe acting’s too good, buddy.”
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Solvang84
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2020
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TIL that Warner Bros. allowed Bugs Bunny to appear in 'Who Framed Roger Rabbit?' under the stipulation that he only appear opposite Mickey Mouse, and that the two receive the same amount of screen time. The resulting scene is the only time in film history that the two have shared the screen together hollywoodreporter.com/hea…
πŸ‘︎ 45k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dabams23
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2019
🚨︎ report
As coronavirus spreads across the U.S., Chicago penguins got the opportunity to see sights perhaps never before seen in the species’ history. Because the city’s Aquarium was closed down to prevent transmission of the virus, the building’s penguins were allowed to roam and explore other exhibits. nydailynews.com/coronavir…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zuom
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2020
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Everything about 'The Gang Tries Desperately to Win an Award' makes it one of my favorite sitcom episodes of all time, but this song at the end is a true high point in television history. youtu.be/pQnYmC4-_1c
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cochise22
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2020
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Doctors of Reddit, what is the most obvious lie a patient has ever told about their health history?
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/theElmsHaveEyes
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2019
🚨︎ report
After 'The Exorcist' was completed and director William Friedkin spent twice the allotted budget, execs at Warner Bros. saw the final product and didn’t think they could sell it, releasing it in only 30 theaters nationwide at the end of 1973. It became the biggest hit in studio history. film.avclub.com/for-all-i…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BunyipPouch
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
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TIL George Clooney once contemplated suicide while recovering from a head injury sustained from filming a thriller movie, as the pain as so great. He basically bruised his brain and couldn’t take painkillers due to a family history of addiction. He had to use therapy to get through it. theguardian.com/world/200…
πŸ‘︎ 42k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tokyono
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Astronaut Bruce McCandless II floats untethered away from the safety of the space shuttle, with nothing but his Manned Maneuvering Unit keeping him alive. The first person in history to do so.
πŸ‘︎ 79k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tysenburg
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I have a bit of a porn and masturbation addiction and I’m kind of struggling with it.

TLDR; I’m 19 years old and have a bit of a masturbation and porn addiction. I use mastication as a way to cope with negative emotions and boredom. It’s gotten to a point where I’d rather spend hours masturbating and watching porn rather than take care of my responsibilities. I’ve noticed I’ve become very unproductive and lazy and my self esteem has been dropping. It’s becoming an issue with my life and I feel I’m really struggling with this.

I’m 19 years old and as the title states, i have a bit of a masturbation and porn addiction. I didn’t even know it was really an addiction until I was 17. I mean I always though of masturbation as a normal thing and it was pretty normal for someone my age to look at porn.

I’ve been looking at porn since I was 9 years old I believe. It started off as mostly fascination because I could never really get access to that stuff as I’m able to now. But then I was really interested in it and started using it for pretty much β€œenjoyment” purposes. Although, I didn’t start masturbating until I was 11. I remember I would look at it pretty much every chance I got. When my mom got a new iPod, I would lock myself in the bathroom to look at it. I would stay up late to watch it on my aunts laptop whenever she let me use it. I think maybe it was mostly still fascinating to me at the time and thrilling because I knew I wasn’t supposed to do it.

I can’t really say when it really became an issue for me. I know at some point, I began using masturbation as a way to cope? Whenever I was anxious, sad, needed help sleeping, or feeling numb, I would turn to masturbation. It wasn’t really for personal enjoyment or anything anymore and I would do it whenever I was feeling boredom. That was one of the biggest issues because I would spend hours (literally) masturbating and watching porn in my room or in the bathroom instead of taking care of my responsibilities like school work or chores. So I ended up doing a lot of things last minute because it wouldn’t get done. I felt it was making me feel very lazy and unproductive.

I couldn’t masturbate without watching porn either. When I was 17, I realized it was an issue after I went on a binge for a few months. I was in a pretty bad place mentally and emotionally and I would use it to cope. I would do it 4 times a day for a few hours. It was worse during my breaks because I had a lot of time to do it. When I realized it was an issue, I turned to NoFap for help. But I failed a lot and still do. I turn

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/champangemami18
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2019
🚨︎ report

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