This guy pulled off a 5-month long con with a hidden fake mustache just to make a dad-joke pun...and it’s amazing
πŸ‘︎ 538
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GreekAlphabetSoup
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2019
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Dad joke pun the GF hit me with this morning regarding blue jeans

While putting on a pair of jeans this morning before work, I remarked to my gf something along the lines of "I've had these jeans for years, they're so old!"

To which she replied: "Yeah I can see that, they look like they've been in your family for generations."

I'm still absolutely floored with pride.

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2019
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When telling dad jokes/puns, do you prefer your victims to laugh or groan?

I personally prefer horrible puns that make the listener regret being born with ears. But thats just me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BigBootyBear
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2015
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My friend and I went to the new stage production of β€œWords.” The production had many jokes, puns, and comedic lines. At the end, my friend asked me for an explanation because he didn’t get the humor.

I told him it was a play on β€œWords.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrPlay3r13
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2019
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[request] Conspiracy theory jokes/puns

I'm making a very silly game based on conspiracy theories. Chemtrails, flat-Earthers, aliens that kind of thing.

I need a ton of jokes and puns. Plz help.

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2018
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My girlfriends father, the king of the dad joke/pun, walks past a can of tick repellent..

Glances at his watch, taps it, keeps walking and says "Still ticking. What a scam"

On a daily/hourly basis he reels them off. It's amazing. He also photoshops pictures (using Microsoft Paint, because he likes the challenge) of himself into various ridiculous and punny situations that might be the most comically genius things I've ever seen. If you're interested I'll find some for you guys.

πŸ‘︎ 86
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pmqv
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2016
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My sons first, solid dad joke/pun - I'm so proud.

My son is four. We do a lot of puns around our house and he has tried hard, but they don't really make sense. The other day I made a mistake and said, "Oh, crap!" He told me I shouldn't say that word and I agreed, but was frustrated because I made a mistake. A minute later:

"Dad! I have a joke for you!" "What's that, bud?" "What do you say when you make a mistake and have to throw it away?" "I don't know, what?" "Ohhh, SCRAP!"

I'm so proud.

πŸ‘︎ 61
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuccessiveApprox
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2015
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My Dad with the dad joke/pun combo

Me: Dad can you turn the kettle on?

Dad: Sure thing!

(walks to kettle, bends down and whispers)

Dad: Oh Kettle you're so hot...

πŸ‘︎ 257
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Orbital9221
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2014
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[question] Are dad jokes puns?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/starno
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2016
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A awesome dad joke pun I used yesterday

So I was talking with a friend and said a really bad pun. After a sigh and a head shake he said "Man puns are terrible" , to which I followed up, puns are not terrible unless you write them down on paper (because the become "tearable")...

Took him a second to get it, but I was proud.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fildain
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2013
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Training for dad level jokes.

My wife is pregnant with our first child so I'm stepping up my joke game to reach dad level.

Mother's day was not so long ago, and since she isn't a mother yet but only a future mother, I didn't get her flowers I only got her seeds, which are future flowers.

At least I found it hilarious and so did she. Hope you guys enjoy this!

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jackybeau
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10
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My 3 year old's first joke

What's wobbly in the sky A jellycopter

Not the best execution, but I'm happy he's joining the tradition of bad jokes

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rushpig
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02
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My very first dad joke as an actual dad.

On the day my daughter was born Nurse: We're gonna have to give her a few shots in her heel. Me: Her heel?! She's not going to be able to walk for months!

πŸ‘︎ 16k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/brickforsheep
πŸ“…︎ May 19
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Sorry this isn’t really a joke but I wanted to say thanks

I just wanted to thank everyone here. My mom has been in the hospital with the virus and being able to send her jokes from here has made her laugh (we both really like puns!) so I just wanted to thank y’all for the fun jokes you post. I know it doesn’t seem like much but it has been very nice to be able to share them with her!

Edit: thank you so much for the awards and well wishes! I 100% did not expect this to blow up like it did and I’m so glad for y’all’s support!!

πŸ‘︎ 16k
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πŸ“…︎ May 23
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My dad (67) just sent this to me. It's literally a dad joke. Some of us might not get it though I'm sure.

What does the Pink Panther say when he knocked over an ant hill?

Dead ant... dead ant... dead ant dead ant dead ant... dead ant dead ant....

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Maddened
πŸ“…︎ May 30
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Do you know where I store all my dad jokes?

In a dad-a--base

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ht-18
πŸ“…︎ May 22
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I have to tell someone about this because I'm at home alone with my 2 year old and 11 month old, and they're to young to understand my best dad joke ever.

My 2 year old has cereal in her snack cup and just showed me that there was a piece of cereal in her sleeve. I said, "Looks like you got some tricks up your sleeve." GUESS WHAT KIND OF CEREAL SHE WAS EATING!.....IT WAS TRIX!
Edit: Thanks for my first gold!

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Superj89
πŸ“…︎ May 18
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*This is a literal Dad Joke my father used to tell when I was a kid about 30 years ago. He's almost 80 now and it still makes him laugh.* - So, there was this man named James Fart. Everybody made fun of him since he was very young. "James Fart! James Fart" the bullies used to make him cry...

He came of age among this suffering and at 21 was finally able to legally change his name. He arrived at the government office where he presented himself:

-I'm James Fart and I want to legally change my name!

Of course they laughed at him (everybody did) but eventually they all settled and came around to the situation.

-Ok, so... your current name is.. Β·chucklesΒ· James Fart... I'm sorry, I just...

-I know, everybody has been laughing at my name since as long as I can remember.

After a long and tedious process, everything is ready.

-Very well, sorry for the delays but you know how hard this protocols are. The good news: you are no longer "James Fart", what name do you want instead?

-Charles Fart.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gone11gone11
πŸ“…︎ May 06
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My dad made his first dad joke in a long time

For context: we have a vegetable garden and a dog named Max

During dinner, my mom remarked how her stir fry was made almost entirely out of vegetables from our garden except the eggs, to which my dad said β€œwell then we’ll just have to raise some chickens.”

I reply, β€œwell what about Max?”, implying that he might attack the chickens.

And without hesitation my dad replies, β€œwell he can’t lay eggs”

πŸ‘︎ 742
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Asian_dodo
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11
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I don’t get any of these dad jokes in this community!!!!

I must not have Reddit right.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ah20250
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26
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I plagiarized this joke.
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Toe-knail
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27
🚨︎ report
Figure out the joke yourself
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Just-Be-Chill
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22
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My son just told me his first dad joke. He's 8, so go easy.

Son: what did the fig say to the table?

Me: I don't know, what did the fig say to the table?

Son, angry voice: Hey! I'm asking the questions here. You FIG-ure it out.

Edit: thanks for the silver, I'll tell the boy in the morning!

Edit 2: explained to my son about the up votes and awards. When he heard that someone spent real money to congratulate him for the joke, he said he bets it was his grandparents. He's excited y'all enjoyed it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RicoCat
πŸ“…︎ May 23
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I finally thought of a clock joke

It's about time

πŸ‘︎ 329
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πŸ“…︎ May 27
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I think Helium hates my jokes.

He doesn’t react to any of them.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AndrewYTTRA
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03
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My wife is fed up of my constant Dad jokes, so I asked her, "How can I stop my addiction?"

Wife: "Whatever means necessary,"

Me: "No it doesn't”

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dandan_56
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30
🚨︎ report
I have a math joke

But I’m 2^2 to say it

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spacemann7
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01
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I was going to put a joke on here about carpentry.

But i didn't think it wood work.

πŸ‘︎ 285
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ May 25
🚨︎ report
I’d like to tell my lasagna joke here,

...but it’s multi-layered and way too cheesy

πŸ‘︎ 245
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PapaMammatus
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08
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How can you tell your dad joke is a dad joke?

It’s fully groan.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KoronaSenpai
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09
🚨︎ report
Anti-joke?
πŸ‘︎ 53
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πŸ‘€︎ u/donaps_13
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07
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I told a joke to a Japanese guy earlier about Sodium and Nickel...

He didn't get it though, so he just said "NaNi?!"

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/qwopcircles
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03
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I have a scary joke to tell you about maths

But I’m 2Β² to tell it!

πŸ‘︎ 357
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lewishoodmusic
πŸ“…︎ May 26
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I was going to make a joke about this mahogany bird, but that would be so immature...wooden tit.
πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CrazyPenguin44
πŸ“…︎ May 20
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I tried to come up with a joke about social distancing.

This is as close as I could get.

πŸ‘︎ 15k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22
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Not a joke: does anyone have any Dad jokes that I can use on my 5-year-old? I see maybe one joke per week on here that she would understand. Do we need a r/youngerdadjokes?

Punchline

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tippopotamus
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01
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7 year old my wife babysits just pulled out a dad joke...

While playing with our 5 year old son and discussing Ninjas and Lego Ninjago...

7 Year Old: I know what kind of shoes Ninjas wear....

5 Year Old: What kind?

7 Year Old: Sneakers

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thebowtiger
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10
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This joke panes me
πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_vasiliss
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11
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It’s kind of a β€˜shitty’ joke
πŸ‘︎ 54
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πŸ‘€︎ u/johntheas
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08
🚨︎ report
My 2.5 year old told his first dad joke.

While traveling to a cookout at my dads house, my wife (W) was working through the alphabet with my son (s)

Letter β€œI”: W: β€œ I is for..... iguana” S: β€œiguana.... iguana go outside.” W: looks at me. I look at him. S: (in his best dad style, cheesy laugh) β€œha, ha.”

He had no idea what he said. But gosh we got a kick out of it.

πŸ‘︎ 162
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πŸ‘€︎ u/imahntr
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08
🚨︎ report
How can you tell when a joke is a 'dad joke'?

When its apparent.

πŸ‘︎ 118
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πŸ‘€︎ u/atltop5150
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06
🚨︎ report
Want to know where I store all of my jokes?

In a dadabase....

πŸ‘︎ 942
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πŸ‘€︎ u/techtornado
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
🚨︎ report
I wanted to tell a yoga joke.

But it was a bit of a stretch.

πŸ‘︎ 209
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KairuSmairukon
πŸ“…︎ May 28
🚨︎ report
I’ll tell you a corona virus joke now...

But you will have to wait two weeks to see if you got it.

Edit: Thanks for the gold!

πŸ‘︎ 881
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zuckerschneggle
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
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My 11yo daughter just made up a joke. What do politicians thing of themselves?

That they're politicool...

Im biased but i think its genius

πŸ‘︎ 12k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Happy1327
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04
🚨︎ report
When do you know a joke is a dad joke?

When the punchline is a parent

πŸ‘︎ 134
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ohioboy22
πŸ“…︎ May 15
🚨︎ report
I like jokes about the eyes

The cornea the better

πŸ‘︎ 277
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arceist_Justin
πŸ“…︎ May 18
🚨︎ report
[Meta] The real purpose of dad jokes

Back in the before times, when sit-down restaurants existed, I used to order boneless cheese sticks and would just throw the word "boneless" in front of any appetizer with 100% corniness. The purpose of this isn't to make a good joke. It's not a good joke. The purpose is to make my dining companions catch some cringe splash damage and want to crawl into a hole and die out of embarrassment for my being horribly corny.

But there is a real, deeper purpose that I've discovered entirely by accident. People, especially young people, are so self-conscious and worried about saying or doing something embarrassing that it taints a lot of social gatherings. They go to a restaurant and are afraid to speak up even when their order is blatantly wrong. They'll tip well even when the food took an hour to arrive and the server has disappeared into the corn stalks behind a baseball field. It takes 2 hours of hanging out together before some friends finally stop nitpicking themselves, uncomfortable in t

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 139
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Permatato
πŸ“…︎ May 18
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I'd tell you a chemistry joke...

but all the good ones Argon

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/babygirlblue
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08
🚨︎ report
How do you correctly compliment a dad joke?

Dads a good joke!

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AbandonedS
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09
🚨︎ report
Where do you store dad jokes ?

In a dad-a-base

πŸ‘︎ 997
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Le_Canard
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22
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I heard this guy whispering a lot of Pokemon jokes to his friend...

...but I couldn't catch them all.

πŸ‘︎ 369
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BunzarTheFuzzy
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
🚨︎ report
I was going to make a joke about the unemployed...

but I couldn’t find one that worked.

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MiggyLT
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the guy who invented the 'Knock Knock' joke ?

He won the "No-Bell Prize"

πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12
🚨︎ report
The best joke I can think of is quarantine.

If you don't get it, it's because it's an inside joke.

πŸ‘︎ 268
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShotFirst57
πŸ“…︎ May 10
🚨︎ report
I know tons of dad jokes! Here’s one

1

πŸ‘︎ 54
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dandan_56
πŸ“…︎ May 29
🚨︎ report
I would tell a time travel joke,

but you didn't like it.

πŸ‘︎ 357
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ May 13
🚨︎ report
Anyone else noticing a recent influx of herb related jokes?

It is that thyme of year, I suppose.

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/entropolous
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04
🚨︎ report
My cousin tries to keep posting jokes on this sub, but gets repeatedly banned by the mods.

He’s my cousin, twice [removed].

πŸ‘︎ 548
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26
🚨︎ report
Communist jokes can be funny

But only if everyone gets them

πŸ‘︎ 872
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πŸ‘€︎ u/douglabe
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22
🚨︎ report
My mother sent me this. And I needed to share it. Behold! The Dad Joke to end all Dad Jokes!
πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 01
🚨︎ report
I overheard this guy whispering Pokemon jokes to a friend

But I couldn't catch them all

πŸ‘︎ 133
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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ May 30
🚨︎ report
I want to tell a Star Wars joke...

But I’m afraid it would be too forced.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11
🚨︎ report
Owl tell you a joke
πŸ‘︎ 117
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πŸ‘€︎ u/prabeshdai13
πŸ“…︎ May 09
🚨︎ report
Dad joke lvl 100
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/harris_dornimo
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09
🚨︎ report
Want to hear a joke about paper ?

Never mind it's tearable

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ May 31
🚨︎ report
Seally joke
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheMirsinho
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12
🚨︎ report
This is a really dope joke
πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/creepinonthenet13
πŸ“…︎ May 30
🚨︎ report
I would tell a joke about quantum mechanics...

But if you saw it, it wouldn't be as good

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/djbodford1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12
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Dad jokes are important

They are a big part of pop culture

πŸ‘︎ 592
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πŸ‘€︎ u/its-a-joke--chill
πŸ“…︎ May 03
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Can anyone inform me on who invented knock knock jokes ?

They deserve a no bell prize

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/darkalan64
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22
🚨︎ report
Want to hear a joke about paper?

I’m warning you. It’s tare-able

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AirmanProbie
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04
🚨︎ report
Can we stop circulating the same jokes over and over into the ground.

It's boring.

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kellzone
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02
🚨︎ report
Bird Jokes are very pun

Every where I go I see a group of ravens.

Call me crazy, but I think it’s a conspiracy.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ May 04
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What's the difference between a dad joke and an uncle joke?

Whether you groan or moan

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 05
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When I was 4 I asked my dad what languages my family spoke and he said "Gibberish" as a joke

So I spent the next 10 years telling everybody that my family spoke Gibberish and English and always wondering why they would laugh after I said that

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/applesauce0101
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11
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I was going to share a joke about sodium on here...

...But then I thought, "Na, they've probably heard it before."

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Majikthise042
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11
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Why can you get arrested if you tell Optimus Prime a joke?

Vehicular man’s laughter.

πŸ‘︎ 53
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 28
🚨︎ report
I'll give this one a go, with severe fright of being ridiculed for not knowing proper enunciation of the German dialect, especially after I felt no love for my PP joke recently. Please be quiet & let me have the floor. I speak timidly "What is the German word for brassiere?"

Shtoppumfrumflopinn. eh ehh?

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NYRion7
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12
🚨︎ report
Why don't eggs like jokes?

the crack up

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/invisible_being
πŸ“…︎ May 29
🚨︎ report
Let's be honest,communist jokes aren't that funny

Unless everyone gets them

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arandomredittuser
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08
🚨︎ report
Dad jokes are at all all-time high during quarantine times

Analysts say it's the worst pundemic ever recorded in modern history.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pikindaguy
πŸ“…︎ May 04
🚨︎ report
Have you heard the joke about getting rid of covid?

It’s a riot!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CodyClay1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10
🚨︎ report
The first joke my 3yo self ever made

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?

To get to the bottom.

My dad remembers me being really proud of it and telling everyone, haha!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SweetSideOfFries
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02
🚨︎ report
A humerus joke
πŸ‘︎ 53
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sid_sh09
πŸ“…︎ May 08
🚨︎ report
A joke about a suit that doesn’t fit?

Hey fam... My grandpa passed away yesterday and as I’ve been reflecting on old memories I vaguely remembered this old joke he used to tell me. I was hoping maybe someone in this community could help. I don’t remember much about it other than that it was about a suit that didn’t fit and the person in the joke had to keep getting it tailored. And maybe it was just the way my grandpa told the joke, but he’d always make this really theatrical voice and yell β€œhey! what did you do to my new suit?!” If anyone can help a grieving girl out that would be swell. :)

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/missjayelle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11
🚨︎ report
9/11 jokes go brrr
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πŸ‘€︎ u/moomansell
πŸ“…︎ May 12
🚨︎ report
Wanna hear an airplane joke?

Nevermind, it'd go right over your head.

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πŸ“…︎ May 18
🚨︎ report
How do you know when a joke becomes a dad joke

It'll become apparent

πŸ‘︎ 47
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lazy_R_Username
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05
🚨︎ report
A boxer wants to tell his coach a joke

But he forgot the punchline

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thatonedipp
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05
🚨︎ report
I have joke about left-handers.

The only issue is I’m having trouble finding the right audience.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jlionbad
πŸ“…︎ May 11
🚨︎ report
I have a joke about ducks.

Nvm I don't think it would quack you up.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Raijin_Thundergod
πŸ“…︎ May 16
🚨︎ report
I'd make a camera joke

But it'll dissappear in a flash with all the other jokes here

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πŸ‘€︎ u/moon1499
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10
🚨︎ report
Want to hear an elevator joke?

Girlfriend: No

Me: you sure? It’s really next level.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/copper_bullet
πŸ“…︎ May 20
🚨︎ report
I have a few jokes about unemployed people

But none of them work

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shikidoodles
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05
🚨︎ report
How would you summarize : "A pun walked into a bar and killed ten jokes."

Pun in ten ded.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 07
🚨︎ report
Among all the politically incorrect jokes I know, here’s my favourite:

Benjamin Franklin was the greatest US President.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22
🚨︎ report
So there was a protest the other day. Someone told a joke, and nobody could stop laughing. It was a riot.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sK197666
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01
🚨︎ report
Wanna hear a joke about pizza?

Never mind, it’s too cheesy..

πŸ‘︎ 46
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πŸ‘€︎ u/brandjohns
πŸ“…︎ May 14
🚨︎ report

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