In Principle Puns

Cole’s Law

He sits outside the class and can’t stop laughing. The principle walks by and sees him. He asks, “Jimmy, why are you sitting outside your class laughing?"

“I farted in class and the teacher threw me out.” The principle asks him again, “Well then, why are you laughing?”

“Because those idiots are sitting in the class smelling my fart while I’m outside in the fresh air."

When they have to make a past principle tense, it gets in-tense.

In the ship I saw the Master at Arms’ office and weapon storage was right near the ship’s bakery. It struck me as odd, until I realized that the Navy followed the same principles as the Army having the US gold in Fort Knox, surrounded by an armored force.

You have to be able to guard the dough.

I'm home for the holidays so I was lying down in my room when suddenly my brother and father burst in! My brother is holding a tape measure.

They say "Hey, check out this new physics we've invented!" while my brother fiddles with the tape measure.

I looked up and with a mixture of horror and resignation I asked "What?"

"It's the principle of BELLYTIVITY!" while stretching the tape measure between their belly buttons.

Cackling they both ran out of the room.

I'm stuck here for five more weeks. I don't think I'm gonna make it.