Why was the chicken sent to the principles office?

He was caught using fowl language.

(I came up with this, but I'm sure it's been done before)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/awkunzler
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
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What has questionable principles and flies?

Mike pence during tonight’s debate.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anddditburns
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2020
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What is the scientific principle which describes the movement of cabbage in mayonnaise

Cole’s Law

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Scorpoll
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2019
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I don't have any principles.

Which means I have vice principles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/which_spartacus
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
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What Scientific Principle Should You Follow When Making Guacamole?

Avocadro's Law

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MuchoTornado
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2018
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I tried coming up with a joke about Heisenberg's uncertainty principle...

The problem was, as soon as I thought of the punchline, I forgot the set-up, and vice versa.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SmegPod
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2015
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what do you call a group of corrupt headmasters?

a lack of principles

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bdogski
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2020
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I pour my root beer into a square cup.

Now it's just beer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tanzaniteflame
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2018
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I collected a lot of data trying to disprove observation bias.

It was exactly what I expected.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2018
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How do you make holy water?

You boil the hell out of it!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lumber__Zach
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2017
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I need a pun related to the NES

My girlfriend is making a shirt with a chibi NES controller on it. We are at a loss for puns related to the NES. Any help please?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Doomhobo
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2014
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I let my family down. They dreamed of me becoming an accountant...

had to explain to them I lost interest and decided to become a principle.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SirBeefy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2016
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My dad and brother teamed up!

I'm home for the holidays so I was lying down in my room when suddenly my brother and father burst in! My brother is holding a tape measure.

They say "Hey, check out this new physics we've invented!" while my brother fiddles with the tape measure.

I looked up and with a mixture of horror and resignation I asked "What?"

"It's the principle of BELLYTIVITY!" while stretching the tape measure between their belly buttons.

Cackling they both ran out of the room.

I'm stuck here for five more weeks. I don't think I'm gonna make it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Eschaton
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2013
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If you can be bought...

If you can be induced to compromise your principles for money, that makes you a horrible person.

^^^([whoreable])

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πŸ‘€︎ u/willyyam
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2014
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