Why are Greeks not morning people? Because Dawn is tough on grease.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mookster1338
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2018
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How do you put out a grease fire?

νΡρό

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arsenolite
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2018
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Dadjoked the family while watching Grease last night.

The scene in the beginning where they ask Danny how the action at the beach was. I said "I guess you can say it was pretty...Sandy."

Eyerolls and groans all around, and me feeling proud of myself.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/taicrunch
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2014
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Girlfriend's sister said she wanted to watch Grease. Asked her dad if they had Grease.

"No, but I have some Crisco in the cupboard."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DingoMontgomery
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2014
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What do you cook fries with?

Lots of de-grease.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Antihuman
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25
🚨︎ report
Belgium??
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/prabeshdai13
πŸ“…︎ May 21
🚨︎ report
Obituary for the Pillsbury Dough Boy, Pop N Fresh

The Pillsbury Doughboy, remembered best as "Pop N Serve", and/or "Pop N Fresh", died yesterday of a severe yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.

Doughboy will be buried in this lightly greased coffin.

Dozens of celebrities will turn out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch.

The grave site is expected to be piled high with flours.

Aunt Jemima will deliver the eulogy and lovingly describe Doughboy as "a man who never knew how much he was kneaded".

Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers.. He was considered a very smart cookie, but wasted much of his dough on half-baked schemes.

Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play dough, three children: John Dough, Jane

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eyes_and_teeth
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18
🚨︎ report
The first French fries weren't cooked in France

They were cooked in grease

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jhench78
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08
🚨︎ report
How do you get John Travolta out of your cheese?

Use Dawn. It takes Grease out of your whey.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CognitiveNerd1701
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18
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Cross post, credit to Lukas2811_
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πŸ‘€︎ u/imaginepicklez
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15
🚨︎ report
The First French Fries Weren’t Cooked In France

they were cooked in grease

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tayzy-
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15
🚨︎ report
Greased-back hair is not Greased back-hair
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mr_usher
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2017
🚨︎ report
Did you know the first French fry wasn’t cooked in France?

It was cooked in Greece

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/agarcia128
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Most people think that the first French fries were cooked in France.

They were really cooked in Grease

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/limminl
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22
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What do you call a refrigerated grilled cheese?

Chilled grease!

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2019
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Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France?

They were cooked in Greece.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheJapanPeople
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2018
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Full tank please!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Professor_Jamie
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2019
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I like how they light the Olympic torch near Athens, then it stays lit all the way to the opening ceremony.

I guess it's hard to put out a Greece fire.

πŸ‘︎ 658
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CheeseheadDave
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2018
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What's the best time of day to wash your engine?

Dawn, it's tough on grease.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nano_Jragon
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2019
🚨︎ report
The first French fries were not made in France.

They were made in Grease.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bad11ama
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2019
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If twilight is the opposite of dawn then...

A drop of twilight and grease is there

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Toady-The-Load
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2019
🚨︎ report
French fries aren't from France.

They come from grease.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheVirginBarry
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2019
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French Fries

Contrary to popular belief, the first french fries were not cooked in France! They were cooked in Grease..

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DarkEco4breakfast
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2019
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Archaeologists have discovered an oil stain that might be more than a thousand years old.

It is Ancient Grease.

πŸ‘︎ 219
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you know the first French fries where not made in France?

They where made in grease.

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/namethadqq
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2018
🚨︎ report
In which European city was oldest donut discovered: Paris, London, Berlin, Athens or Rome?

It was found in ancient grease.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OK_Compooper
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2019
🚨︎ report
The Greek army is very good at night

But Dawn is tough on Grease

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheManCaveGamer2
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2018
🚨︎ report
TIL French Fries were not originally fried in France.

They were fried in grease!

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_Cabbage_Corp_
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you know French fries don’t come from France?

Because they were made in grease.

(Told to me by one of my students because I like bad jokes)

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spyderpig89
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2018
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My girlfriend and I were talking about driving in foreign countries.

Her: "Urban Italy looks like a bad place to be with a rented car."

Me: "Yeah, I suppose there are some very old & busy cities there."

Her: "I don't know if I could do it. My Dad drove in Greece and that was bad enough."

Me: "Oof yeah, sounds sketchy. Though you'd think they'd have cleaned it up by now."

Her: ?

Me: "The grease."

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/robcap
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2018
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Are you on the Mediterranean Diet?

Because I see a lot turkey and grease.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/somedude-1
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2019
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Why did the bald man put fish oil on his head?

Because he thought it would make his herring grease.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/arbaminim
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2018
🚨︎ report
The First 'French Fries' weren't fried in France.

They were fried in grease.

Credit: Bob &Tom in the Morning All Me Baby. No credit to anyone else.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Trevo525
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2018
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I turned an English paper into one giant pun.

A Call to Arms A Plead to the Limbless

The Armless are a stump among society and could easily achieve more. It’s bothersome that somebody with great potential could allow themselves to lose grip of what they aspire for. The radius of support and development that surrounds these people is astounding. Yet they bite the hand that feeds and throw away opportunities. With each passing day they are crippled by the errors in their ways. Not only are they not properly handling the situation, they are doing a disservice to society. Most will say to refrain from pointing fingers, but it is pertinent that we show them their faults.
All aside we should most certainly not try to elbow my way into their lives. However, if they were to branch off into their own progressive groups it would be most beneficial. And severance is a good thing between them and the public. This doesn't mean a complete amputation of them from society. Perhaps selective assistance will help these people find a well fitte

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chewy_64
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2015
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How is Zorba the Greek like a paper towel?

They can both 'Zorb all that Grease.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Henri_Dupont
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2017
🚨︎ report
Working on the car

So my dad and I are working on my car when I am having a hard time loosening a bolt on the engine. After a hard tug it came undone and my arm slid into a large amount of grease. My dad turns to me and says,
"looks like all it needed was a little elbow grease"

Heeheehee.......dammit dad.

πŸ‘︎ 50
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Etrius1228
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2014
🚨︎ report
Did you know that french fries aren't actually cooked in France?

They're cooked in grease!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2017
🚨︎ report
My son and I double Dad Joked my wife

This stupid song from the movie Grease comes on the radio and my wife asked, "Do you know what part of the movie they sing this song in?". I said , " The worst part?" She said," No the end." And my son replied, "So the best?"

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/monkeybassturd
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2015
🚨︎ report
Corn bread

I made cornbread tonight and used bacon grease to grease the pan. When I flipped the pan onto a plate and it came out clean, I said "thank you, lard"

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CaptMercaptan
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2015
🚨︎ report
Trust dad to make light of a disappointing experience at the local mechanic

I was telling my dad about how we just got our car back from being fixed at our local mechanic and had a pretty disappointing experience. I had to call back several times only to find that there would be further delays (5 days total) until the car was repaired and after 'cleaning' the car and they left grease marks everywhere - including all over the windows, on the steering wheel and door handles.

My dad cut in with "at least you could slip through the traffic easily".

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fairyoathen
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2015
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What do you call bacon that's 100 days old?

Ancient Grease.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PhilABustArr
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2014
🚨︎ report
French Fries weren't cooked in France...

They were cooked in Grease.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OtisBrownTheCat
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
🚨︎ report

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