At least he didn't say Happy Gnu Ear again

My dad was following me around all morning holding an oversized sock. I finally asked him what gives and he just said plainly. "I'm stocking you, son."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Xenrei
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2014
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You know who you are.
πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hot_controller
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2021
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The wildebeast

A wildebeest walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Well, this is gnu."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Firegoat1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2021
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Why don’t they play poker in the savanna?

There’s too many cheetahs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/H8spants
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
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My son hates it when I make Computer jokes while talking to him. One day, he took my laptop and...

...RANSOMWARE.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RoyalWar5180
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
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My dad says to me,"Hey,let's go fishing! We'll take the canoe."

I told him,"It's actually pronounced"gnu."The "g" is silent!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shdchko
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
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Was lost and confused when visiting the local aviary.

So I sorted by gnu.

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
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I think my brother is ready for kids.

"Everyone's freaking out that Matt Damon is bourne again, who cares what his religion is. He's just an actor."

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShakesOfMilk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2014
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Where can you get corned wildebeest in India?

At the Gnu Deli.

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2020
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Why is the wildebeast the most respected animal on reddit?

he sorts by gnu.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sugarweed120
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2019
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Wee fish, ewe, a mare, egrets, moose, wee fish, ewe, a mare, egrets, moose, wee fish, ewe, a mare, egrets, moose...

... and a hippo gnu year.

First saw that one in 1984 and it burned itself into my memory. :)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Matti_Matti_Matti
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2014
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What was the wildebeest herder’s favorite way to view Reddit?

Sort by Gnu

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lankyjay16
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2018
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Do you know what the first open-source subatomic particle is?

The GNU-trino

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πŸ‘€︎ u/necrotechnical
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2017
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Heard of new distro TrumpLinux?

It's fake gnu

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xstreamly
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2017
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My Pride and Joy

My son asked me this morning why our 10 year old dog is no good with Linux. Then he explained to me that "you can't teach an old dog Gnu tricks."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tallpapab
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2014
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Taking a Tram Tour at the San Diego Zoo Safari Park while a Gran'dad

While taking the Tram Tour around the Africa enclosure at the Safari Park we passed a group of Wildebeest.

I turned to my wife and said "I don't remember this group of Wildebeest, they must be Gnu."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FreddieFreelance
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2013
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